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Is it normal for girls to talk about relationships with their friends?

I always thought at this age (19) me and my friends would talk about guys and relationships... I've found it to be the complete opposite.

With one friend... We talk about wanting to be in a relationship... But my friend never goes in depth about stuff. For example... If there's a guy she likes... She won't tell me. The only thing we ever talk about is wanting to be in a relationship. She'll never ask me for advice or tell me about anyone she likes.

With other friends I have... We never talk about relationships. Whenever I ask my friends if they like someone... They make a joke about it and say they like no one. For all the time we've been friends they've never once told me who they liked... They always say they like no one. I understand they may not like like someone... But they've never even told me who they find attractive. They've never even told me about finding a celebrity attractive. We just never discuss anything about it... Even when I bring it up.

I always see on television and in books... Girls go to their friends for advice and talk to their friends about guys... I genuinely feel I can't talk to any of my friends about this sort of stuff... I want to... But because they're all quite reserved I feel I can't.

For example... Another one of my friends is seeing someone... I feel like I can't even generally talk to her about her relationship... It just seems like a dead end conversation... For example I asked her if she was nervous about her first date... She said no. That's it... When I tried to get further into it... It was just useless. I asked how Valentine's day was... She said good. I understand she may not want to tell me personal stuff... However... Whenever we have a conversation about it I just feel like it's a one word reply and she's not interested.

I want to know if this is normal? Do girls talk to their girl friends about their relationships? Do girls ask their girl friends for advice?

Personally... None of my friends have ever asked me advice... These are close friends I'm talking about and people I've known for more than 2 years...

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I personally (as a girl) talk to one male friend about relationships but only certain things like my friend's relationship was going downhill and he asked for my help with how to help prevent it failing and another friend helped me when I was confused about liking my now long term male partner (I was into girls at the time and was confused) with the first friend we had only been colleagues for a year the other I had known forever and it took us until about two years ago to start talking about relationships and stuff I'm 20 now and he didn't tell me for two years after he lost his virginity. And none of my female friends talk about that stuff apart from one who just tells me all the time about the sex she isvgetting with random guys and doesn't want to hear anything from me...
Which is fine by me her anecdotes are kinda funny and I really don't want to tell her private stuff.

What I'm saying by demonstrating the above is that every friendship is different and you can't expect people to really talk to you about stuff A because they may not want to or may be shy/a private person or religious... B you may make them feel uncomfortable or be too forceful with them- how/in what context do you ask? C they may want you to get to know them before they tell you anything

Some people just don't talk about that stuff it doesn't make them less of a friend or is anything to do with being male or female...Or anything else! :tongue: it's just the way they are
Accept that these friends don't want to talk about it, find other new friends who do want to talk about it or who are more open too...it's always good to have a range of friends!
If it's the fact that they don't talk about private stuff with you think what am I doing to stop them talking about this with me? As a last resort just ask them-why don't we talk about things like relationships or how we feel? It may make your friendship stronger...Or weird them out :tongue: good luck!! And don't worry!! :smile:
Reply 2
Is that the only thing you want to talk about? Don't you have more interesting things in mind?
With my close friends yeah :smile:
Original post by Ecro
Is that the only thing you want to talk about? Don't you have more interesting things in mind?
i was thinking the exact same thing!! I guess OP is at that stage in her life where relationships really matter/are new and therefore she wants to talk about them to understand them , i was there at school tbh..don't mean to be patronising or anything....
Reply 5
Tbh it's better when they're not constantly banging on about relationships in your ear hole. The occasional chat about it is good but you get these girls that giggle and non stop chat about 'oh and he said this then I said that'...I just think to myself, is that your life? :tongue:
Reply 6
Original post by marythestudent
I personally (as a girl) talk to one male friend about relationships but only certain things like my friend's relationship was going downhill and he asked for my help with how to help prevent it failing and another friend helped me when I was confused about liking my now long term male partner (I was into girls at the time and was confused) with the first friend we had only been colleagues for a year the other I had known forever and it took us until about two years ago to start talking about relationships and stuff I'm 20 now and he didn't tell me for two years after he lost his virginity. And none of my female friends talk about that stuff apart from one who just tells me all the time about the sex she isvgetting with random guys and doesn't want to hear anything from me...
Which is fine by me her anecdotes are kinda funny and I really don't want to tell her private stuff.

What I'm saying by demonstrating the above is that every friendship is different and you can't expect people to really talk to you about stuff A because they may not want to or may be shy/a private person or religious... B you may make them feel uncomfortable or be too forceful with them- how/in what context do you ask? C they may want you to get to know them before they tell you anything

Some people just don't talk about that stuff it doesn't make them less of a friend or is anything to do with being male or female...Or anything else! :tongue: it's just the way they are
Accept that these friends don't want to talk about it, find other new friends who do want to talk about it or who are more open too...it's always good to have a range of friends!
If it's the fact that they don't talk about private stuff with you think what am I doing to stop them talking about this with me? As a last resort just ask them-why don't we talk about things like relationships or how we feel? It may make your friendship stronger...Or weird them out :tongue: good luck!! And don't worry!! :smile:


Thanks for the reply. I always ask in a general way... It's never foroceful or unnatural... I'll just generally ask them... For example... Is there anyone you like at university? And before that we'll be taking about university anyway...
Reply 7
Original post by Ecro
Is that the only thing you want to talk about? Don't you have more interesting things in mind?


It's not the only thing I want to talk about... I think it's the fact we never speak about it.

I just assumed at this age people would speak to about it...
Reply 8
Original post by marythestudent
i was thinking the exact same thing!! I guess OP is at that stage in her life where relationships really matter/are new and therefore she wants to talk about them to understand them , i was there at school tbh..don't mean to be patronising or anything....


This could be partly the reason... It's something new and something everyone is going through at this age... I just assumed people would speak about it...?
Reply 9
Original post by Hanya Pouncey
Tbh it's better when they're not constantly banging on about relationships in your ear hole. The occasional chat about it is good but you get these girls that giggle and non stop chat about 'oh and he said this then I said that'...I just think to myself, is that your life? :tongue:


Because my friends never speak about it... I think I'd prefer what you described above! 😂😂😂😂😂
Reply 10
Original post by >Username<
Because my friends never speak about it... I think I'd prefer what you described above! 😂😂😂😂😂


Haha let's swap situations!😂😛
No. I never talk about that. I once talked about this guy to my friends and well they ruined it for me and him. They made fun of him, called him weird and made him delete my number.

Girls get jealous... I don't want a friend to be jealous about the fact I have a thing with a guy.

I will never talk relationships with a girl unless we are close and she has someone aswell

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