I have a totally gigantic ass.
Mostly just genetic though - I have naturally huge legs, which are proportionally short compared to my torso (and just short full-stop, since I'm 5'5, so yes, they are tree-trunks) and that's also where I store most of my fat. I mean, I know there's a lot of fat since when I shake my legs a lot of the flesh on the inner bit of the thigh bounces about and my quadriceps themselves aren't very defined from the side when not tensed and despite having gigantic thighs I still struggle to squat 110KG...
They still look good though. Look like any rugby player's legs and they're still good for wrestling since they weigh a ****ing ton.
Sorry OP I can't even help you.