Don't know whether to be flattered or disgusted...

what a

My head is genuinely a little bit of a mess right now.

So I went out for a spot of lunch this afternoon and had a fondue, rather enjoyed it. The type with skewer-type utensils that you stab your food with to pick it up. I'd been having a cheeky flirt with our waitress, what a gorgeous set of buttocks she had

After I'd finished eating, the same waitress took my plate away and went around the bar, almost round the corner to some sinks but she was still just about in clear view from my seat, and I was having another look at that fantastic ass.

Here's where it gets odd. She put my plate in the sink. She then took the skewer I was eating from and started sucking it, then popped it in her pocket and disappeared round the back somewhere. What on Earth...

I feel weirded out, obviously. Did she just fancy a bit of what was left on the stick and thought I looked in good hygeine (maybe similar to how a lot of people would still drink a beverage if someone they fancied spat in it)? Why did she keep the stick, though... Hopefully she's not gathered our mixed DNA on a stick and is planning to create a test tube baby (which, thankfully, I don't think is possible).

My head is genuinely a little bit of a mess right now.

Next time on things that never happened...

She's DTF mate. Go back and get those digits.

GUMI's real parents deciding to keep him upon his birth

That's where you tell her you've got another stick for her...........
Seriously though, that's kinda weird, I dunno what to make of that

I realise now I've missed an opportunity, was just a bit taken aback tbh. She might also cut off bits of my hair and steal my boxers to start some sort of shrine

Frankly, if she took your boxers off you whilst you were wearing them, then that's a pretty reasonable deal in my books.

Well, I did mean once they were already on the bedroom floor, but you're right there.

Good sleep?

maybe she wanted to make a clone of you