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How to act around my uni teacher?

He's a young guy (26, I'm 21), who's probably attracted to me or just finds me weird, I don't know. I don't want to make you think I'm reading into stuffs too much, just because I like him. For this reason, I'll try to explain how he is matter-of-factly.
One thing is that he's nervous around me. At the beginning I thought that's the way he is, like I know that there are teachers who just sometimes gets awkward in front of lot of students. After a while, though I started to doubt this theory since I found seats at the back of the class and such times he's calmer. But basically when our eyes meet while explaining, he starts rubbing his chest, or touches his nose, his neck, anything. And also starts shaking his legs. He gets distracted when our eyes meet, it's like he freezes for a moment and has to concentrate hard to remember what he was talking about.
His awkwardness by the way goes even beyond his lectures. Whenever we randomly run into each other, he's really jumpy. When we met each other for the first time by accident, he really looked frightened (?). I told him good morning and he said it back in a cute almost girly voice.
Another thing that he's sometimes staring at me from far. At the very beginning I caught him looking away, but he no longer looks away and it's very confusing. He sometimes tilting his head and even parts his lips. Once he was licking his lips in an almost weird way while I was talking and he was staring into my eyes.

On the other hand, it also seems like he tries to avoid any personal contact with me. Not that I have ever tried to come up to him or such, it's just that he sometimes can't make an actual sentence when talking to me about school stuffs. When I didn't realize that he might have feelings for me, I used to go to him asking about some school-related stuffs, because he knows that I'm a foreigner and had difficulties at the beginning, so he was very kind at the beginning of this semester and didn't act the way he does now.

Now I don't ever go up to him to ask him about anything, because I realized that he's uncomfortable with it, and for this reason I also feel uncomfortable.

I think he's a great guy and really sweet. When I started to realize his flirtatious signs, I felt bad for it, because I knew that as a student, it wouldn't be legal to have any kind of romantic relationship with a teacher.
At the same time, now that I see him all the time literally suffering around me (because of me?), I wish I wouldn't acted that cold.
He stopped flirting, at least I feel like he's trying to control himself. But we still make eye contact (because I cannot help but look at someone who is explaining). Also, he's not staring that much, but he tends to look away quickly as soon as I realize him staring. Another really annoying thing is that he always takes a breath whenever he sees me or walks past me.

I didn't want to, but I got into this very uncomfortable situation, of which I don't know how to get out. I tried to, but it's impossible to just ignore him. I don't know how to act around him and he seemingly doesn't know that either. I tried to break the ice by asking about the start date of winter break. I know it was a weak reason to talk to him as I could ask anyone about it. As a response all he said without even looking at me that he doesn't know, and that I should know it.

I'm thinking whether he is angry with me because I didn't responded to him in a positive way or he's just trying to move on because he realized that it's not appropriate to flirt with a student.

Sorry for the long story, btw. The real question is simple: what should I do. I know, try to focus on school and on my grades, but I'm just not feeling well around him and can't help but feeling uncomfortable around him.
Reply 1
Original post by Anonymous
He's a young guy (26, I'm 21), who's probably attracted to me or just finds me weird, I don't know. I don't want to make you think I'm reading into stuffs too much, just because I like him. For this reason, I'll try to explain how he is matter-of-factly.
One thing is that he's nervous around me. At the beginning I thought that's the way he is, like I know that there are teachers who just sometimes gets awkward in front of lot of students. After a while, though I started to doubt this theory since I found seats at the back of the class and such times he's calmer. But basically when our eyes meet while explaining, he starts rubbing his chest, or touches his nose, his neck, anything. And also starts shaking his legs. He gets distracted when our eyes meet, it's like he freezes for a moment and has to concentrate hard to remember what he was talking about.
His awkwardness by the way goes even beyond his lectures. Whenever we randomly run into each other, he's really jumpy. When we met each other for the first time by accident, he really looked frightened (?). I told him good morning and he said it back in a cute almost girly voice.
Another thing that he's sometimes staring at me from far. At the very beginning I caught him looking away, but he no longer looks away and it's very confusing. He sometimes tilting his head and even parts his lips. Once he was licking his lips in an almost weird way while I was talking and he was staring into my eyes.

On the other hand, it also seems like he tries to avoid any personal contact with me. Not that I have ever tried to come up to him or such, it's just that he sometimes can't make an actual sentence when talking to me about school stuffs. When I didn't realize that he might have feelings for me, I used to go to him asking about some school-related stuffs, because he knows that I'm a foreigner and had difficulties at the beginning, so he was very kind at the beginning of this semester and didn't act the way he does now.

Now I don't ever go up to him to ask him about anything, because I realized that he's uncomfortable with it, and for this reason I also feel uncomfortable.

I think he's a great guy and really sweet. When I started to realize his flirtatious signs, I felt bad for it, because I knew that as a student, it wouldn't be legal to have any kind of romantic relationship with a teacher.
At the same time, now that I see him all the time literally suffering around me (because of me?), I wish I wouldn't acted that cold.
He stopped flirting, at least I feel like he's trying to control himself. But we still make eye contact (because I cannot help but look at someone who is explaining). Also, he's not staring that much, but he tends to look away quickly as soon as I realize him staring. Another really annoying thing is that he always takes a breath whenever he sees me or walks past me.

I didn't want to, but I got into this very uncomfortable situation, of which I don't know how to get out. I tried to, but it's impossible to just ignore him. I don't know how to act around him and he seemingly doesn't know that either. I tried to break the ice by asking about the start date of winter break. I know it was a weak reason to talk to him as I could ask anyone about it. As a response all he said without even looking at me that he doesn't know, and that I should know it.

I'm thinking whether he is angry with me because I didn't responded to him in a positive way or he's just trying to move on because he realized that it's not appropriate to flirt with a student.

Sorry for the long story, btw. The real question is simple: what should I do. I know, try to focus on school and on my grades, but I'm just not feeling well around him and can't help but feeling uncomfortable around him.


When i was at uni lecturers could have relationships with students aslong as the lecturers inform the department so there is no favoritism if he was to mark your work but there was no problem with student teacher dating.
Just act normal around him if you fancy him maybe act flirty and show him not to be nervous around you.
Although he dosent seem to act comfortable maybe just concentrate on your work instead.
(edited 7 years ago)
Reply 2
Can't you find someone else other then your uni lecturer to date? If this is allowed i really want to know who allowed such nonsense, i demand a law to ban this. When i have kids and i send them to university i dont want them to date their flipping uni lecturer.
Original post by Anonymous
He's a young guy (26, I'm 21), who's probably attracted to me or just finds me weird, I don't know. I don't want to make you think I'm reading into stuffs too much, just because I like him. For this reason, I'll try to explain how he is matter-of-factly.
One thing is that he's nervous around me. At the beginning I thought that's the way he is, like I know that there are teachers who just sometimes gets awkward in front of lot of students. After a while, though I started to doubt this theory since I found seats at the back of the class and such times he's calmer. But basically when our eyes meet while explaining, he starts rubbing his chest, or touches his nose, his neck, anything. And also starts shaking his legs. He gets distracted when our eyes meet, it's like he freezes for a moment and has to concentrate hard to remember what he was talking about.
His awkwardness by the way goes even beyond his lectures. Whenever we randomly run into each other, he's really jumpy. When we met each other for the first time by accident, he really looked frightened (?). I told him good morning and he said it back in a cute almost girly voice.
Another thing that he's sometimes staring at me from far. At the very beginning I caught him looking away, but he no longer looks away and it's very confusing. He sometimes tilting his head and even parts his lips. Once he was licking his lips in an almost weird way while I was talking and he was staring into my eyes.

On the other hand, it also seems like he tries to avoid any personal contact with me. Not that I have ever tried to come up to him or such, it's just that he sometimes can't make an actual sentence when talking to me about school stuffs. When I didn't realize that he might have feelings for me, I used to go to him asking about some school-related stuffs, because he knows that I'm a foreigner and had difficulties at the beginning, so he was very kind at the beginning of this semester and didn't act the way he does now.

Now I don't ever go up to him to ask him about anything, because I realized that he's uncomfortable with it, and for this reason I also feel uncomfortable.

I think he's a great guy and really sweet. When I started to realize his flirtatious signs, I felt bad for it, because I knew that as a student, it wouldn't be legal to have any kind of romantic relationship with a teacher.
At the same time, now that I see him all the time literally suffering around me (because of me?), I wish I wouldn't acted that cold.
He stopped flirting, at least I feel like he's trying to control himself. But we still make eye contact (because I cannot help but look at someone who is explaining). Also, he's not staring that much, but he tends to look away quickly as soon as I realize him staring. Another really annoying thing is that he always takes a breath whenever he sees me or walks past me.

I didn't want to, but I got into this very uncomfortable situation, of which I don't know how to get out. I tried to, but it's impossible to just ignore him. I don't know how to act around him and he seemingly doesn't know that either. I tried to break the ice by asking about the start date of winter break. I know it was a weak reason to talk to him as I could ask anyone about it. As a response all he said without even looking at me that he doesn't know, and that I should know it.

I'm thinking whether he is angry with me because I didn't responded to him in a positive way or he's just trying to move on because he realized that it's not appropriate to flirt with a student.

Sorry for the long story, btw. The real question is simple: what should I do. I know, try to focus on school and on my grades, but I'm just not feeling well around him and can't help but feeling uncomfortable around him.


OMG i have the exact same problem as you!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply 4
Original post by Anonymous
OMG i have the exact same problem as you!!!!!!!!!!!


Ah, it's good to know someone who can relate to my problem, what are you doing? I bet you haven't find the right solution either. Once you come up with one please tell me about it! :biggrin: I don't know how about you but as for me, this thing simply drives me nuts.
Reply 5
Original post by Zeus007
Can't you find someone else other then your uni lecturer to date? If this is allowed i really want to know who allowed such nonsense, i demand a law to ban this. When i have kids and i send them to university i dont want them to date their flipping uni lecturer.


As if it was something you can choose. Haven't you ever felt attracted to someone you knew it was forbidden? By the way I agree with you, you can believe me this definitely was not a thing I've been dreaming of. It's simply annoying and that's exactly why I want to figure out what the heck is going on with him and if nothing else, I am even willing to go out with him, if this would solve the problem. You know, it's not fun to be around someone who's distracted because of you and you cannot do anything but listen to him painfully. This even lessens my willingness to study his subject, because I don't want to bother myself thinking about him all the time. And I feel this way after one month. I can't imagine what would (or will) happen months later if things remained the same.
Original post by Anonymous
Ah, it's good to know someone who can relate to my problem, what are you doing? I bet you haven't find the right solution either. Once you come up with one please tell me about it! :biggrin: I don't know how about you but as for me, this thing simply drives me nuts.


No I haven't got a solution- but I have the same problem with lots of staring and acting nervous. He can't even speak to me properly; he just starts stuttering! Yeah i feel really uncomfortable around him too- to make it worse I am also very attracted to him too.:redface:

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