He asked me to be his girlfriend! Why can't I say yes?!

URGENT HELP NEEDED!

I sit next to this boy and I really thought I liked him and was considering asking him out.Then he asked me! Usually I can just say yes or no. I don't know why but I'm finding it really hard to say yes.?! He definitely has an amazing personality and I've known him for about a year and a quarter but isn't particular attractive. Why am I struggling so much to say yes?!
I have had a lot of relationships for my age the longest lasting 3 years and the shortest lasting about 2 days. I have ended about 2/3 of them. Could that be affecting my answer?

Reply 1

utr

18

Maybe because you actually like him you're struggling to say yes in case you do end up breaking up with him?

The way to look at it is, how much will you regret it if you don't tell him? Would you rather not say yes and not try it OR say yes, it falls on its arse and it doesn't work.

I suppose the other alternative is that your subconscious is telling you that you don't actually like him and you've found yourself liking him purely because you're sat next to him.

Reply 2

rockrunride

19

I have two guesses.

Firstly, your "liking" may have been the idea of being with him and perhaps you weren't prepared for the imminent possibility of intimacy. You mulled over asking him, which was great, but when he asked you it was a shock, you've been thrown a curveball and you have to adapt.

Secondly, pursuit is a thrill. If you were to immediately say yes, the thrill would dissipate and take work to get back again. Your mild resistance is regenerating the thrill.

(edited 6 years ago)

Reply 3

MrDoggyPants

12

You've made 3 different threads about this.
https://youtu.be/9Deg7VrpHbM

Reply 4

username944192

21

Original post by Girl w/ problems

the shortest lasting about 2 days

How old are you?

Reply 5

Crumpet1

19

You say he's got an amazing personality and you like him - so say yes. You're saying yes to going out, not marrying the guy.

Reply 6

Tricky12002

2

Original post by Girl w/ problems

URGENT HELP NEEDED!

I sit next to this boy and I really thought I liked him and was considering asking him out.Then he asked me! Usually I can just say yes or no. I don't know why but I'm finding it really hard to say yes.?! He definitely has an amazing personality and I've known him for about a year and a quarter but isn't particular attractive. Why am I struggling so much to say yes?!
I have had a lot of relationships for my age the longest lasting 3 years and the shortest lasting about 2 days. I have ended about 2/3 of them. Could that be affecting my answer?

You can probably go for an evening out without rushing off to Gretna Green or even agreeing to a marriage proposal.
(Perhaps he will agree to wear a bag on his head?)

Reply 7

cheesecakelove

20

Perhaps you are nervous to say yes? Do you feel ready to date again? If so, say yes. You get on well together and you like him!

Reply 8

SomeWelshGuy123

19

Original post by infairverona

How old are you?

I was gonna to say that, i've slept longer than that before.

Reply 9

bones-mccoy

19

Asking someone on a date is not the same as asking to be their SO

Reply 10

username3381582

9

Original post by Girl w/ problems

URGENT HELP NEEDED!

I sit next to this boy and I really thought I liked him and was considering asking him out.Then he asked me! Usually I can just say yes or no. I don't know why but I'm finding it really hard to say yes.?! He definitely has an amazing personality and I've known him for about a year and a quarter but isn't particular attractive. Why am I struggling so much to say yes?!
I have had a lot of relationships for my age the longest lasting 3 years and the shortest lasting about 2 days. I have ended about 2/3 of them. Could that be affecting my answer?

are you a malayali?

Reply 11

username3381582

9

This girl is a troll who is hungry for attention on student room and wants more rep points>>>this is her like 5th thread on this!!! Report her please for heavens sake

Reply 12

Brinda2018

3

Original post by Tricky12002

You can probably go for an evening out without rushing off to Gretna Green or even agreeing to a marriage proposal.
(Perhaps he will agree to wear a bag on his head?)

+100 points for Georgette Heyer reference. In response to OP, high school relationships typically don't last that long, so you can date him w/o worrying about marriage and other commitments. Also, if he's got an amazing personality, he's a dying species of teenage boy so I'd suggest you snap him up before someone else does. To be as cliched as possible, looks fade — but personality doesn't.

Reply 13

Tootles

21

Original post by Girl w/ problems

URGENT HELP NEEDED!

I sit next to this boy and I really thought I liked him and was considering asking him out.Then he asked me! Usually I can just say yes or no. I don't know why but I'm finding it really hard to say yes.?! He definitely has an amazing personality and I've known him for about a year and a quarter but isn't particular attractive. Why am I struggling so much to say yes?!
I have had a lot of relationships for my age the longest lasting 3 years and the shortest lasting about 2 days. I have ended about 2/3 of them. Could that be affecting my answer?

You're more interested in the chase than the boy.

If you don't find him attractive, don't bother. But do be honest.

Reply 14

username3517176

6

Original post by Girl w/ problems

isn't particular attractive

There's your answer, you don't find him attractive enough to say yes.

Reply 15

freedom

19

Original post by Girl w/ problems

URGENT HELP NEEDED!

I sit next to this boy and I really thought I liked him and was considering asking him out.Then he asked me! Usually I can just say yes or no. I don't know why but I'm finding it really hard to say yes.?! He definitely has an amazing personality and I've known him for about a year and a quarter but isn't particular attractive. Why am I struggling so much to say yes?!
I have had a lot of relationships for my age the longest lasting 3 years and the shortest lasting about 2 days. I have ended about 2/3 of them. Could that be affecting my answer?