Guy I'm seeing won't help?

I started talking to a guy who is a PhD student. Initially he came across as a very quiet and serious guy who is very focussed on his studies.
So when I noticed him staring at me a lot, I decided to approach him thinking he's shy and quiet.

Turns out, he is not whom he appears to be. Anyway, I'm thinking of doing a PhD myself so I thought he would be of great help.
However, when I asked him about his research, all he said was the topic he was writing on. I asked him about his fieldwork, he simply replied I have my fieldwork.
He didn't tell me anything nor seemed interested in his own research. I also asked him how difficult it is or how he manages his time, and again he went like "Anyone can do a PhD, I'm not organised and I barely get any work done as I come in late and go out a lot".

Which is true that the only time he comes in early when he's 2 weeks away from the deadline. Otherwise, he's always going out, drinking or even hooking up with girls (which he denies) .

He also told me that I don't have to worry about PhD either and offered no help.

Should I stop seeing this guy?

What exactly is your relationship based on?

I dont even know. We have lots of things in common but like he doesn't offer any help on anything. So I'm assuming it's just looks/physical considering he stares ate a lot?

Is that enough for you?How long have you been together.Is he happy with his own Phd?

Not for me hence asking this question. 3 months and he never says anything . His colleagues talk so much in depth, how its a rewarding experience etc and they are always very busy with their work too.
But he's a completely different case.

He comes in, sits 2 hours then gone. Sometimes he even ghosted me but tried to revive us by chatting in person.

Maybe he is having a hard time with his Phd or is struggling with depression.Bottom line is you have a communication problem and unless you two are able to talk to each other about how you are feeling you are going nowhere fast.Many people do not have a great phd experience and he may not want to admit it but after 3 months unless he is fantastic fun and great in bed I think I would look elsewhere .But I do not go for moody silent blokes!

But he seems relaxed ???

seems.

But if he was struggling he wouldn't be going out this much???

He might? Stress does odd things to people and they don't always wear it clearly on their sleeves.

The way I see it is people make time and effort for the things they care about. If you observe that his actions would suggest he doesn't then take it for what it is. Granted that's easier said than done. Perhaps draw back a bit and focus on other things/ people.

Some people are really competitive and they may think that helping you puts you in a better position than them. He may not want to help because he doesn't want you surpassing him. Hence why he's so vague with his field work and not offering to help.

In any case, regardless of what the reasoning behind his actions are, he's shown himself to be cryptic and reluctant to help, so take it for what it is - a man not wanting to help. We tend to focus too much on the why (which is very understandable) but don't waste too much time on it when the end result (him being vague, unreliable and unhelpful) is the outcome he chose.

Is this the chap with the messy hair who doesn't cook for himself or somesuch?

What's this about?

I'm the one providing value , from concern and care. All while receiving nothing in return.