Hi,

I was hoping to get some advice from this site..

A bit of background:
I'm an 18 yr old female and was raised as a Muslim from birth. My dad is religious, not to the extremes, but a firm believer of God. He taught me to read the Quran at a young age. My mum isn't religious at all. I have been confused as to my feelings for my religion for a long time. I've tried so hard to make sense of them but I can't and I don't know who to turn to. My parents wouldn't understand at all. My father would disown me instantly for even thinking like this.

I'm not religious. I drink. I don't pray 5 times a day and I've never prayed in a mosque in my life. I have never once fasted. I know what I do is wrong and I feel guilty all the time. I just feel awful all the time. All this probably makes me sound like the worst muslim ever but I've always believed in God... though I've doubted his existence at times.

I wonder if why, if there is God, that he brings so much pain and sorrow to this world. My family has been through so much, my dad specifically, but he is the most religious out of all of us. So, why does God choose to test him all the time?

I'm told that God has a plan for all of us but how can he? I feel like my life is one unfortunate event after the other.. is that just God's plan and I'm supposed to accept it?

There's a few of things within Islam that I don't agree with... :/

I pray, when times are tough, and it feels like nobody is listening. I do believe in a God or maybe it's the idea of him that I believe in.. I'm not even sure anymore. I don't think becoming a full on atheist is for me. I think I need the hope that comes from believing in a God to not feel so alone.. even though that probably sounds so stupid.

I don't know whether leaving Islam is for me which is why I need help. I'd love some advice on this. I'm on anon because I'm so scared I'll get a lot of backlash for saying this. This is so difficult for me to type and the first time I've even admitted my feelings to myself.

Can someone give me some advice as to what I should do or who I should talk to? This honestly isn't a troll.

I can give more information on request - if needed. I'll PM people further information if they don't want to give a full reply on this thread. :/

Thank you to anyone for even bothering to read all of this. :frown:

Hello! First of all, I have no intentions of pressuring you to pick either side.

I hope you're aware you can believe in god and not be a muslim.
You have disagreements with Islam, so I'd say that you should go away and do some research. Go to a mosque and maybe ask the Imam some questions, have a read on things online, read Quran with commentary, read hadith, look at the arguments on both sides and after your research I think it will become clear whether you want to leave or stay muslim.

People use religion to support them, it comforts them and ultimately people believe because they want to. So do you want to believe? Is it more important to you to have that community and have the answers laid out for you, or are you seeking truth? If it's the latter then I'd suggest doing research like I said above. At the end of the day religion requires faith, and you can't force it.

It's a very difficult thing to share your doubts about Islam, so congrats to you for speaking up about it. I can try to give you the best advice I possibly can, if you'd like it.

Best of luck! x

Reply 27

username2926188

21

Original post by oShahpo

Things happen for a reason? Fuc**** bull****.
My aunt died a few years ago, leaving behind 3 little girls with no one to take care of them, at all, what's the ****ing reason behind that? Allah sure never heard the prayers of her three children, crying for her to stay alive. And if he did, then the ass**** didn't do **** about it. Don't tell me everything happens for a reason, people die by the millions of starvation and disease, what's the reason for that? What's the reason for AIDS? What's the reason for cancer? What's the reason for Malaria? God didn't have anything better in mind when he killed around 12,000 Africans by Ebola, did he?

You are so disrespectful and immature. That sort of attitude isn't going to get you anywhere in life. And i didn't mean that EVERYTHING happens for a reason and you know that didn't.

Reply 28

l'etranger

2

Lots of Muslims I've spoken with have found they tend towards belief in God without following any religion since it makes more sense to them. Nobody chooses to believe or disbelieve so you have to forgive yourself rather than allowing the feelings of guilt to consume you. Whatever you choose in the end, or if you are never fully sure, you've done nothing wrong.

Reply 29

somemightsay888

20

Come on OP, you know what to do, you've even written out the solution;

You can still believe in God without belonging to a religion, you already do really.

Definitely don't tell your parents, Islam doesn't allow apostates a leg to stand on.

Reply 30

xCoddi

4

Convert to Shia Islam? Lol

Reply 31

oShahpo

20

Original post by emerald7770

You are so disrespectful and immature. That sort of attitude isn't going to get you anywhere in life. And i didn't mean that EVERYTHING happens for a reason and you know that didn't.

Oh, so not everything happens for a reason? So God just likes to roll dice every once in a while and see what happens, you know, sometimes he does things for no reason, even if that means death of millions. It's either that, or God just can't stop Malaria or AIDS, in such case, he's not really worthy of worship.

Reply 32

PossiblyNotGod

20

Original post by hezzlington

May allah guide you back :/

May atheism guide you forward.

Reply 33

Anonymous #2

Original post by oShahpo

Things happen for a reason? Fuc**** bull****.
My aunt died a few years ago, leaving behind 3 little girls with no one to take care of them, at all, what's the ****ing reason behind that? Allah sure never heard the prayers of her three children, crying for her to stay alive. And if he did, then the ass**** didn't do **** about it. Don't tell me everything happens for a reason, people die by the millions of starvation and disease, what's the reason for that? What's the reason for AIDS? What's the reason for cancer? What's the reason for Malaria? God didn't have anything better in mind when he killed around 12,000 Africans by Ebola, did he?

look mate, life is a test just because we don't understand the wisdom behind these things, doesnt meanthere is wisdom byGod, ever heard of faith?have a little bit of it...over and out (drops mic)

Reply 34

l'etranger

2

Original post by XOR_

May atheism guide you forward.

It's not the hokey cokey m8

Reply 35

hezzlington

20

Original post by XOR_

May atheism guide you forward.

Original post by l'etranger

It's not the hokey cokey m8

Hahahah

Reply 36

troubadour.

19

Original post by Anonymous

Can someone give me some advice as to what I should do or who I should talk to? This honestly isn't a troll.

I can give more information on request - if needed. I'll PM people further information if they don't want to give a full reply on this thread. :/

To be honest, this is one situation that attracts vultures like no other, so I'd advise that you consult only yourself. It really is an individual thing - you either believe that Islam is true, or you don't. You can't consciously 'decide' what to believe, you just do.

You're welcome to PM me in confidence but, as I said, this is mostly about you and you're unlikely to hear anything you didn't already know or expect to hear.

Reply 37

Zamestaneh

21

Original post by AppleB

right

Original post by ShamelessSharma

Salafism is the most extreme form of islam

I think ISIS and Saudi Arabia are salafi aswell
Posted from TSR Mobile

Khwarijism* is the most extreme form of Islam. It involves a lack of understanding and the strict application of rules in an incorrect fashion, and thus those Muslims who commit major sins are considered apostates and executed. This is what ISIS is like; ISIS is not Salafi.

Salafism is an orthodox methodology in understanding Islam as it was understood by those who first believed and practiced Islam - the Prophet, his companions, those who followed them, and the generation after them. The scholars and population of Saudi Arabia are largly Salafi; the laws and policies set by the government are orientated towards the Salafi understanding of Islam, but there are obvious ways in which it deviates e.g. having a King (which isn't an Islamic concept), forbidding women from driving (not an Islamic concept) etc.

Reply 38

Anonymous #2

Original post by l'etranger

It's not the hokey cokey m8

hockey cokey, what is that? Some new drugs yobs be sniffing?

Reply 39

MadVisionary

13

My life got much better after I got rid of the chains of Catholicism, having been raised as a catholic.
You can believe in whatever you damn well want, without having stupid rules imposed on you by others
I'd say leave Islam, then believe in a god if you like😄 There's no reason to conform to a religion you're not comfortable with
I'd say Deism most closely reflects what I believe
That a God/Deity created the universe then retreated and let nature take its course and didn't interfere
Basically I don't want to rule out the existence of a god but I don't believe there's an omnipotent benevolent omniscient being watching over us day and night judging us for everything we do :tongue: