Keeping Calm and Cavying on at uni

Feel ridiculously groggy. Is so hard to function. 'These will probably make you feel floppy and tired' no kidding. Although is kind of hard to be unstable when feel this tired so that's something. Feel a bit more normal.

03/03/18
What I'm grateful for today
Don't know really

A random act of kindness I've done
Texted my parent best wishes about something

A random act of kindness someone has done for me
@Matrix123 's lovely personal rep :hugs:

Something I could improve on
Doing work

What I've achieved today/Things I did well
Nothing really. Woke up about 7am then went back to sleep again. Kept having hypnagogic jerks which was a bit annoying but yeh. Woke up did some of the se software tutorials we have to do for one of the modules and wrote like one sentence on my report before i got tired again. DId some clothes washing in the bath and showered. Was about it

What I've done to look after my mental health
Dont know taking these 5 pills a day

Something I have to look forward to
Being asleep

Original post by Lemur14

600 calories per hour still seems like a lot! Proud of you for going out in the snow :yep:

(I have hidden indoors since it started :laugh:

) And that was lovely of you to buy them haribo I'm sure they appreciated it :smile:

Posted from TSR Mobile

Original post by 04MR17

I always love notifications from in here. My fave blog :hugs:

(no offence to you other bloggers out there :redface:

).

I'm enjoying the adventures of Gus not gonna lie. :love:

Try not to compare yourself to the dude next to you in the rower. Are bodies are all different, and they're meant to be otherwise humanity would be boring af

Original post by Muttley79

Original post by rhiannon277

thank you guys :hugs:

sorry for never giving extensive replies am just exhausted :redface:

but always appreciate your responses :cube:

Reply 583

How is your neck Cavy?

Don't worry about not replying individually, you have more important things to focus on. I'm always please you even quote me

Hope Gis and wolf are looking after you :smile:

Reply 584

Original post by Muttley79

How is your neck Cavy?

Don't worry about not replying individually, you have more important things to focus on. I'm always please you even quote me

Hope Gis and wolf are looking after you :smile:

It is a lot better thank you :hugs:

still a bit sore but took ibuprofen last night for period cramps and think rowing yesterday helped to loosen it a bit
Thank you for being so lovely I hope you are well yourself and taking care :cube:

Reply 585

Lemur14

Glad you're feeling a bit more normal :hugs:

Reply 586

username3684524

Aw Cavy, I’m so sorry for not getting round to messaging you sooner! :console:

Life has been really intense, I hope you’re a bit better today :hugs:

That all sounds very traumatic. You’re also incredibly brave for even sharing it, I don’t even like thinking about my past experiences.

Sorry to hear that the APs are so sedative. Hopefully it doesn’t impact on your ability to function properly as then it’s not ideal for your quality of life :frown:

If there’s anything at all you need/want/have to ask, I’m a PM away :hugs:

Reply 587

04MR17

Original post by CoolCavy

Thank you guys :hugs:

sorry for never giving extensive replies am just exhausted :redface:

but always appreciate your responses :cube:

That's alright Cav. It's always nice to get a notification in here, even if the response isn't extensive or your day has been a bit rubbishy, because it means you're sharing these parts of your life. And personally, I think sharing is always good.

Reply 588

Original post by CoolCavy

It is a lot better thank you still a bit sore but took ibuprofen last night for period cramps and think rowing yesterday helped to loosen it a bit
Thank you for being so lovely I hope you are well yourself and taking care :cube:

Sore or stiff necks are horrible so good to hear that it is improving. Yes, I'm good thanks, snow is gradually going.

Take care :hugs:

Reply 589

I feel so weird. It's really foggy today outside which is the perfect representation for the inside of my head. Feel sedated.

04/03/18
What I'm grateful for today
My parent. Told them got put on a new drug (not the entire thing about the other night, am keeping that to myself thanks, only drip feed them stuff cos dont want to worry them) and they asked how i was getting on with that and stuff. Appreciate that

A random act of kindness I've done
I did something but i've forgtoten what it was now

A random act of kindness someone has done for me
Messaged my group mate saying that i was really sorry but because of stuff (he knows some of it, one of two people in my class that do) i dont think i could take on the work for monday. He said that was absolutely fine and that him and the other guy would handle it and that they would do anything to help if i was struggling which i appreciate as im behind on litererally everything in life.

Something I could improve on
functioning

What I've achieved today/Things I did well
Have nearly finsihed my report, has taken me so long as can't think of the words im trying to write. Will probably have to read over it when im more awake as some of it probably doesnt make sense.This is the hardest bit cos is about internal mechanisms and stuff and **** me if i know anything about that.

What I've done to look after my mental health
Dont know, slept with my wolf last night

Something I have to look forward to
Dont know, just heard a knocking on the door really loud downstairs cos must have been a parcel or something but nearly **** myself.

Original post by darkforest

Aw Cavy, I’m so sorry for not getting round to messaging you sooner! :console:

Life has been really intense, I hope you’re a bit better today :hugs:

If there’s anything at all you need/want/have to ask, I’m a PM away :hugs:

a, so sorry for not replying to your personal rep :frown:

totally forgot you sent it am sorry :frown:

thank you for being so lovely to me, ik you understand all the things i talk about and appreciate that , you are amazing and i hope you are as well as possible :cube:

Original post by Lemur14

Glad you're feeling a bit more normal :hugs:

Original post by 04MR17

Original post by Muttley79

Sore or stiff necks are horrible so good to hear that it is improving. Yes, I'm good thanks, snow is gradually going.

Take care :hugs:

THank you guys :grouphugs:

Reply 590

Matrix123

Original post by CoolCavy

Sorry I haven't been messaging too much, it's been very stressful with revision and all... still is really haha :tongue:

Glad you've got some lovely people like your group mates there and it's great you're still doing this blog and taking care of your MH :heart:

Reply 591

Am just grumpy today. Am just tired and annoyed that the tiredness wont go away. I slept through the entire night for the first time in ages but still dream. Keep dreaming of ****ing school. At some point before may i need to go back to school to collect all of my work that is on display. I have quite a lot on display so **** knows how im gonna transport it all back but basically i need to go and get it so my dreams keep revolving around that but with other horrible stuff happening. Yay.

05/03/18
What I'm grateful for today
I guess that i can see. My eyesight is *****y hence the glasses but at least i can see well with glasses. There was some blind lady crossing the traffic lights and it was amazing she like put her ear to the traffic light button box thing and knew if it was green or not. Pretty admirable.

A random act of kindness I've done
Gave a homeless guy 50p cos had no haribo.

A random act of kindness someone has done for me
The guy at the gym picked up my comb and returned it to me

Something I could improve on
Not being pissed off

What I've achieved today/Things I did well
Idk why i went outside today tbh. Needed milk and bread and stuff and thought that going outside would make me feel better. It didnt tbh. Walked to the gym via primark. Finally found some knee high socks and some shorts for a good price (£4). Socks are bit translucent but meh whatever, shorts are so much cooler than trousers and then i dont have to walk back all the way home in sweaty trousers cos i can just put the sweaty shorts in my bag and put my normal trousers back on. Did rowing for 20 minutes and cycling for 20 minutes, did some stupid weight things (i can lift 30lb :rofl:

tbf i could probably lift more but would injure my back and my back already has issues) then some calf weight things then went home via lidl.
Everything was going fine until i was taking my stuff from the till to the little shelves to pack it in my rucksack and some woman cut right infront of me so i stopped but my pasta sauce didnt and it flew in a graceful arc to the ground and smashed everywhere :borat:

a great thing to happen to a socially awkward little bean like me. She didnt even apologise :angry:

and i wasted 80p :colonhash:

Went home via the doctors to weigh myself and am only 0.3kg lighter than the days ago i did it last :/ meh am disappointed

What I've done to look after my mental health
Taking these pills. Makes me want to cry that im taking 5 pills a day just to be normal but meh

Something I have to look forward to
Showering cos forgot yesterday and am so greasy

Original post by Matrix123

Sorry I haven't been messaging too much, it's been very stressful with revision and all... still is really haha :tongue:

Glad you've got some lovely people like your group mates there and it's great you're still doing this blog and taking care of your MH :heart:

Dont apologise :nah:

you are the best :hugs:

hope you are well matrix :loveduck:

Reply 592

Could you ask your parent to help with transporting your work from school? It sounds like you need a car to get it all back home. Btw, your work must be amazing if you have so much on display :smile:

Sorry you felt grumpy today, but you still helped people, so well done.

Sending lots of postive thoughts :hugs:

Reply 593

Lemur14

Well done for getting all that done :hugs:

You're doing so well!

Reply 594

Have blisters on my hands from stupid rowing.

06/03/18
What I'm grateful for today
A podcast that i listen to reguarly. They are each an hour long and is loads of them and they are just nice background noise

A random act of kindness I've done
Gave a homeless woman £1. I need to stop giving money to homeless people cos i have like no money myself

A random act of kindness someone has done for me
The lady in the queue in aldi said i could go in front of her and called me lovely

Something I could improve on
Everything everyone does is just annoying me atm

What I've achieved today/Things I did well
Didn't have tutorial until 2:15 in my group of 3 (3 including me) so worked some more on this ****ing report. Realised the bulb i had chosen would probably blind the user so had to change all that. Urgh. Then at 1:45 walked down to uni. Tutor was late by 15 minutes so started at 2:30. Tutorial was fine i guess. Was more concentrating on the massive headache i had and the fact someone was knocking upstairs and that was aggravating.
Tutor wanted to speak with me and asked me to stay behind. He wanted a catch up and stuff and asked how i was doing. Said not very well and told him the stuff that had happened recently. He was just trying to convince me that i was a worthwhile person basically so that was appreciated.
Decided to walk to the gym and because it's me nothing can ever be simple. Was at the traffic lights minding my own ****ing business and these women with a buggy were like 'SCUUUSSEE ME' so i was confused cos there was a massive pavement to the side of me, they could have just walked around me like a normal person and stood there. They tried to ram their buggy into me and started screaming at me about what i was doing and i was like im waiting for the traffic lights to go green like wtf. They could easily get past and i wasnt going to walk into the road it was on red. Then they started swearing at me and laughing at me and saying that i looked like a man. Then they walked across the road (around me like they could have done in the first place) while it was still red and kept looking back and laughing at me. Am so glad that you could pick on someone who already felt **** and has non-existent self esteem just for your 5 minutes of pleasure. Cheers for that. Am now going to have more intrusive thoughts about my appearance :borat:

Cried when they had gone cos im sensitive. Already felt sensitive from talking to my tutor and they made it worse. Am just a joke to everyone. Everyone thinks im weird and abnormal.

Then decided to go to the stupid gym so went and did 20 mins of rowing 20 mins of cycling and like 10 minutes on each stupid weight thing. Turns out i can lift 40lb wow who knew.

What I've done to look after my mental health
Dont know dont care

Something I have to look forward to
Nothing. My life is literally wake up take pill do uni work go to uni go to the gym or the doctors or whatever, go to aldi, come home, take more pills, sleep and have nightmares. Oh yeh and last nights nightmares were just great. Fantastic.

Original post by Muttley79

Could you ask your parent to help with transporting your work from school? It sounds like you need a car to get it all back home. Btw, your work must be amazing if you have so much on display :smile:

Sorry you felt grumpy today, but you still helped people, so well done.

Sending lots of postive thoughts :hugs:

my parent doesnt have a car but i asked them last night when they rang and they said they would help me carry it on the bus :colondollar:

and i would hope so :redface:

tbh am proud of that work but feel like i cant reach that standard again :redface:

sending positive thoughts to you as well :hugs:

Original post by Lemur14

Well done for getting all that done :hugs:

You're doing so well!

Reply 595

Matrix123

Original post by CoolCavy

Dont apologise :nah:

you are the best :hugs:

hope you are well matrix :loveduck:

Aw it's great that you managed to sleep the whole night without waking up or anything! :h:

It's also very nice of you to give that 50p away to the homeless man :yy:

As for the tablets thing, it's better that you're doing something than just neglecting how you feel adn your MH so I wouldn't say it's anything to feel bad about :hugs:

Aww Cavy, you're super awesome :biggrin:

I wasn't feeling that great yesterday but it might be the stress getting to me big time. I'm a bit better today though so I'm just hoping things will continue that way :smile:

I hope you've had a good day :heart:

Reply 596

Congrats on your TSR nominations Cavy :smile:

I'm sure your work is still amazing and forget those mums as they are probably fed-up with their kids - they need to behave like the adults they are supposed to be.

Cavy - you are valued by lots of us on here - Sending positives thoughts.

Wolf and Gus will look after you

(edited 6 years ago)

Reply 597

Lemur14