Am I destined to be alone forever?
I have romantic feelings, and very strong ones. I am gay (female) and have never been in a relationship or done anything serious, but did get close a couple of times with one girl, but it didn't work out. I thought I was asexual as well for a very long time, but I realise now I do have some sexual attraction... I mean I find girls sexy, and imagine all sorts... but I actually have no interest in sex whatsoever. With anyone. That doesn't even make sense to me, so sorry of it sounds stupid. It slightly grosses me out, I'm incredibily insecure as it is, I don't like the feeling of being so inexperienced and facing mockery if I tried anything, and just in general.. I'm not interested. The first time I realised how often people had sex, I was shocked and (ngl) a little disheartened. I thought that, a couple times a week, I'd just have to 'do it' to make my partner happy, but it sounded like a chore and I felt extremely uncomfortable at the thought. To think that, in a relationship (which I want) I would have to force myself. I also think it would be unfair on my partner, if they have needs that aren't met, or if they feel insecure if I seem disinterested.
As of now, I'm still a virgin with no intimate experience whatsoever, so does this mean I have to 'do it' to be interested/enjoy it? I don't even like masturbating, and I very rarely get aroused. However, I do feel romantic attraction like everybody else, and always dreamed of getting a wife, settling down... the usual. But not I feel like I'm going to be forever alone, involuntarily. I thought I would feel differently after I matured and went through puberty, but I don't. Be honest, am I never going to have a happy relationship if I feel this way about sex? Or am I suddenly going to feel differently?
As of now, I'm still a virgin with no intimate experience whatsoever, so does this mean I have to 'do it' to be interested/enjoy it? I don't even like masturbating, and I very rarely get aroused. However, I do feel romantic attraction like everybody else, and always dreamed of getting a wife, settling down... the usual. But not I feel like I'm going to be forever alone, involuntarily. I thought I would feel differently after I matured and went through puberty, but I don't. Be honest, am I never going to have a happy relationship if I feel this way about sex? Or am I suddenly going to feel differently?
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