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Unhappy at university

I am really not enjoying being at university. I'm sorry if the post is too long.

I hate being here all the time and at the end of the day having to stay here rather than go home. I have made a few friends but not loads, and I hate the drinking culture here so much so it's harder. Making good friends seems to be a matter of luck, but I just don't seem to click with many people or have similar personalities to many. I get really worried about this stuff. I also hate that I'm complaining about everything but I just feel very unhappy here.

I'm doing medicine and the course is fine, I like the content. But it is a lot of self directed learning and I am struggling to motivate myself. I miss lots of lectures and try to catch up on a lot but it makes me feel worse. I thought I would be so happy doing my dream course that I've worked so hard for but it's just an anticlimax.

I have been trying to do things to make me feel better. I've been trying to exercise more, go for runs and I joined an ice skating society but sometimes I miss sessions simply because I feel a bit down. I feel like I've gone from a good student to useless.

I've not spoken to any staff about this because I just feel like I'm complaining over nothing. I'm so lucky to be doing this course, and it's not like anything is completely wrong, I just feel unhappy here.

Dropping out is not an option because I know that I still want to be a doctor in the end; I hope that starting placements in year 3 will be better than this now. But I would honestly be happy if the rest of the year was cancelled because of coronavirus- I'm actually holding out hope for it.

Sorry if the post is long but does anyone have any advice, similar stories or encouragement?? Thanks so much for reading

Reply 1

gomgossa

I guess it's easy to feel isolated and that no one else is feeling similar because people don't ever talk about it. But I know some people feel the same, just hard to really feel it.

The lectures are voice recorded so I can deal with that, but if i dont go to the lectures I feel more isolated and things get on top of me. It's just difficult to motivate myself to catch up on, even when I try to I cant focus well. Its annoying because I used to be able to study for hours on end. Now I'm weeks behind and feeling guilty.

The good thing is I still feel content with my course :smile:

I am trying very hard to keep it in mind. At least I have a career path at the end if I can just make it through these few years.

I'm not sure whether to go and talk to my tutor or someone about this to see what theyd say but I'm not sure if theres anything that could be done? Maybe help me to organise my time a bit better ? I just feel like a bit of an idiot if I cant do that myself.

I've been going to ice skating society, signed up for a couple more but haven't actually been to any of their events because theyre limited and fill up too quickly and I guess I'm not super enthusiastic about them. It again makes a big change from last year when I would try and get involved with as many things as I could. Just feel very drained and too drained to focus on different stuff like that. I might start going to running club when I get my fitness levels up further because I know exercise is supposed to make you feel better.

Thanks for your advice :smile:

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

I hate the drinking culture!!! I’ve made friends but I’ve felt many groups immediately closed off to me because of not engaging in that culture. :frown:

Does your uni offer any sort of support scheme where they pair you with a student to help you out because mine does that and I think it’s a good starting point to get advice from a peer.