My parents are pressuring me to change my a level options
Basically i start sixth form this week and i picked chem history and maths. however my parents seem to think the only high paying well respected job is being a doctor and keep trying to make me switch history to biology, saying that history is useless. i wanna be a lawyer/pharmacist so i don’t even need biology plus i hate it a lot and find it difficult. in the other hand history is my passion and i adore the subject. my dad said i can’t be a lawyer because you can only work in one country as a lawyer and if an emergency happens such as a war or something and i need to leave the UK i wouldn’t be able to work, which most likely won’t happen. i feel immense pressure to go into medicine/STEM at uni because of my parents and all my cousins are doctors etc which adds more pressure onto me. what do i do? i really don’t want to do biology but i feel ashamed and like i’m disgracing my parents 
please help
please helpScroll to see replies
Hey,
Biology is a tough subject with a lot of content and I would say only pick subjects you enjoy for A-Levels because they're hard and the only thing that will motivate you and push you to do well is if you enjoy the subject. I get how you feel, my parents wanted me to do medicine so I picked chem and bio and at the start it was really hard for me because I hated it. If you don't want to do it and it's not gonna have a big impact on you're future...then don't do it. Yes you might feel bad about disappointing you're parents but in the end this is your life, not theirs...do what you enjoy. You won't disgrace your parents because tbh they only have limited knowledge on all the possible career paths out there. There are soo many other jobs that can get you a rlly good pay especially pharmacy...so if you want to do It then do it....plus they'll forget all about it once you've applied for uni 😉
Good Luck xxx
Biology is a tough subject with a lot of content and I would say only pick subjects you enjoy for A-Levels because they're hard and the only thing that will motivate you and push you to do well is if you enjoy the subject. I get how you feel, my parents wanted me to do medicine so I picked chem and bio and at the start it was really hard for me because I hated it. If you don't want to do it and it's not gonna have a big impact on you're future...then don't do it. Yes you might feel bad about disappointing you're parents but in the end this is your life, not theirs...do what you enjoy. You won't disgrace your parents because tbh they only have limited knowledge on all the possible career paths out there. There are soo many other jobs that can get you a rlly good pay especially pharmacy...so if you want to do It then do it....plus they'll forget all about it once you've applied for uni 😉
Good Luck xxx
There is no such thing as disgracing yourself when it comes to choosing your path in education. They seem to care only about money.
(edited 1 year ago)
These seem like rather drastic reasons to not do what YOU want to do- it's your life after all. Money isn't all it at the end of the day; people can get by just fine on average salaries. Don't force yourself to do subjects you won't enjoy because you most likely won't do as well in them. You are not disgracing your parents, your parents are disgracing you in all honesty. It's never a parent's job to decide what their kids do (take pageants as an extreme example- it's effectively the same thing in the sense that the parents in the scenario are forcing their child to do something extreme that the child does not want to do). At the end of the day you need to make yourself happy 
hey, try to explain to your parents that there are other pathways to get into uni with the A Levels YOU want, rather than a “normal” degree, there’s entry pathways, join degrees, foundation years that can be used to get into medicine.
Explain that A Levels are hard as it is, especially if you are “forced” to study one you don’t enjoy.
A Levels need full dedication, you have to be passionate about your subjects to do well x
as
Explain that A Levels are hard as it is, especially if you are “forced” to study one you don’t enjoy.
A Levels need full dedication, you have to be passionate about your subjects to do well x
as
there is many unis which dont require bio for medicine only chem and maths so if i were u i would apply to med and as a fifth choice i would put pharmacy. if i get into med then happy days otherwise follow my passion and do pharmacy. if you care about salary more than passion then do med otherwise maybe say u applied to med but dont actually do it then tell them u got rejected. so its kinda not ur fault if you know what i mean. but as a summary u can do med with chem and maths only but if u really dont like med then dont do it and follow ur passion and heart. ♡
Original post by Anonymous
Basically i start sixth form this week and i picked chem history and maths. however my parents seem to think the only high paying well respected job is being a doctor and keep trying to make me switch history to biology, saying that history is useless. i wanna be a lawyer/pharmacist so i don’t even need biology plus i hate it a lot and find it difficult. in the other hand history is my passion and i adore the subject. my dad said i can’t be a lawyer because you can only work in one country as a lawyer and if an emergency happens such as a war or something and i need to leave the UK i wouldn’t be able to work, which most likely won’t happen. i feel immense pressure to go into medicine/STEM at uni because of my parents and all my cousins are doctors etc which adds more pressure onto me. what do i do? i really don’t want to do biology but i feel ashamed and like i’m disgracing my parents please help
please helpOnly about one third of medical schools require A-level Biology and with maths and chemistry you meet the requirements for most of the other ones, so medicine is still an option anyway. So just point that out to them to satisfy them for now and be on your way.
Original post by zuluwarrior7650
There is no such thing as disgracing yourself when it comes to choosing your path in education. They seem to care only about money.
Yes it’s so exhausting. Just today my dad got me to call my uncle and he was telling me history was useless and i have to change my options to biology. I feel like crying i wish i did bad in my gcses so i wouldn’t have all this pressure. I hate this so much I don’t want to do biology at all
Original post by artful_lounger
Only about one third of medical schools require A-level Biology and with maths and chemistry you meet the requirements for most of the other ones, so medicine is still an option anyway. So just point that out to them to satisfy them for now and be on your way.
Thank you
they said i would be behind in medicine if i didn’t study biology tho
Original post by Anonymous
Thank you
they said i would be behind in medicine if i didn’t study biology tho
they said i would be behind in medicine if i didn’t study biology tho
Evidently if the medical schools don't think so, you wouldn't be. You should point out to your parents that the doctors teaching in medical schools who help determine entry criteria know better than they do.
Original post by artful_lounger
Only about one third of medical schools require A-level Biology and with maths and chemistry you meet the requirements for most of the other ones, so medicine is still an option anyway. So just point that out to them to satisfy them for now and be on your way.
yes. another argument would be that if you did ever consider that you did want to medicine it is far better to get 3 As than 2 As in Chem and Maths and a B in Bio.
I am not suggesting at all that you should lie to your parents about this, but no decision has to be made on future careers absolutely now. If you continued down your chosen path of Chemistry, Maths and History then options are open for you to decide what steps you want to take for yourself.
I have been going around the Medicine open days this summer. There is a lot of emphasis from every school that the only reason to do medicine is because you want to - not because somebody else wants you to. Is there a middle path to explore all options / med (by doing some brief online MOOCs) and similar on pharmacy and law. That way you will be informed better for when the discussion arises again as you move through sixth form.
Good luck with whatever you decide.
Hey,
Like others have said, choose subjects you think you would most enjoy. If you end up choosing subjects your parents want you to pick, you likely will not enjoy it and won't be willing to put in the work. This would mean you won't satisfy your parents expectations regarding grades but most importantly, you might not satisfy what you want to achieve and this could limit your career options (whatever that career you have in mind might be).
Besides, if you do end up wanting to go into the medical field (obviously only if you want to; not because you want to make your parents proud), chemistry is the requirement amongst many medical schools anyway and Biology isn't a compulsory subject (it's only required by a small minority of medical schools).
A little anecdote: I am quite good friends with a girl whose parents pressured her into doing Medicine. She did 4 A levels ( and completed them). She was offered interviews at 2 unis for Medicine but she said she didn't try. She was then rejected. She wants to pursue a Computer Science degree at uni but because her parents wanted her to pursue a medical degree, she's still unsure what to do.
Parents might think they know what's best for you but only you truly know. Go with what you want to do because that will make you the most happy and most successful. I know it's hard to put yourself first especially if you care so much about others, but this is one of those occasions where your interests must come first. Trust me, you will thank yourself later!😊
Hopefully, your parents soon start to show less resistance to your A Level Choices. Best of luck!🤗
Like others have said, choose subjects you think you would most enjoy. If you end up choosing subjects your parents want you to pick, you likely will not enjoy it and won't be willing to put in the work. This would mean you won't satisfy your parents expectations regarding grades but most importantly, you might not satisfy what you want to achieve and this could limit your career options (whatever that career you have in mind might be).
Besides, if you do end up wanting to go into the medical field (obviously only if you want to; not because you want to make your parents proud), chemistry is the requirement amongst many medical schools anyway and Biology isn't a compulsory subject (it's only required by a small minority of medical schools).
A little anecdote: I am quite good friends with a girl whose parents pressured her into doing Medicine. She did 4 A levels ( and completed them). She was offered interviews at 2 unis for Medicine but she said she didn't try. She was then rejected. She wants to pursue a Computer Science degree at uni but because her parents wanted her to pursue a medical degree, she's still unsure what to do.
Parents might think they know what's best for you but only you truly know. Go with what you want to do because that will make you the most happy and most successful. I know it's hard to put yourself first especially if you care so much about others, but this is one of those occasions where your interests must come first. Trust me, you will thank yourself later!😊
Hopefully, your parents soon start to show less resistance to your A Level Choices. Best of luck!🤗
(edited 1 year ago)
Original post by Anonymous
Basically i start sixth form this week and i picked chem history and maths. however my parents seem to think the only high paying well respected job is being a doctor and keep trying to make me switch history to biology, saying that history is useless. i wanna be a lawyer/pharmacist so i don’t even need biology plus i hate it a lot and find it difficult. in the other hand history is my passion and i adore the subject. my dad said i can’t be a lawyer because you can only work in one country as a lawyer and if an emergency happens such as a war or something and i need to leave the UK i wouldn’t be able to work, which most likely won’t happen. i feel immense pressure to go into medicine/STEM at uni because of my parents and all my cousins are doctors etc which adds more pressure onto me. what do i do? i really don’t want to do biology but i feel ashamed and like i’m disgracing my parents please help
please helpDon’t change history out for biology.
If you end up doing biology and getting a low grade in it, then it’s possible you’ll get nowhere and your parents will continue being arses to you.
If you stick with history and excel at it (i.e a very realistic possibility), you’ll get somewhere and prove them wrong.
Tell them that your decision is final and that you aren’t going to change it.
You may wish to show your parents each of the following:
Average salary of a lawyer: https://www.reed.co.uk/average-salary/average-lawyer-salary
Average salary of a pharmacist: https://www.reed.co.uk/average-salary/average-pharmacist-salary
Considering the national average salary is like £28,000 or £29,000 iirc, both of the jobs above are perfectly lucrative and are very necessary. If everyone were to become doctors, society would fall apart. By aspiring to differ from your cousins and parents, you are not doing anyone a disservice.
Average salary of a lawyer: https://www.reed.co.uk/average-salary/average-lawyer-salary
Average salary of a pharmacist: https://www.reed.co.uk/average-salary/average-pharmacist-salary
Considering the national average salary is like £28,000 or £29,000 iirc, both of the jobs above are perfectly lucrative and are very necessary. If everyone were to become doctors, society would fall apart. By aspiring to differ from your cousins and parents, you are not doing anyone a disservice.
Original post by TypicalNerd
You may wish to show your parents each of the following:
Average salary of a lawyer: https://www.reed.co.uk/average-salary/average-lawyer-salary
Average salary of a pharmacist: https://www.reed.co.uk/average-salary/average-pharmacist-salary
Considering the national average salary is like £28,000 or £29,000 iirc, both of the jobs above are perfectly lucrative and are very necessary. If everyone were to become doctors, society would fall apart. By aspiring to differ from your cousins and parents, you are not doing anyone a disservice.
Average salary of a lawyer: https://www.reed.co.uk/average-salary/average-lawyer-salary
Average salary of a pharmacist: https://www.reed.co.uk/average-salary/average-pharmacist-salary
Considering the national average salary is like £28,000 or £29,000 iirc, both of the jobs above are perfectly lucrative and are very necessary. If everyone were to become doctors, society would fall apart. By aspiring to differ from your cousins and parents, you are not doing anyone a disservice.
my parents really need to see this! they also say i can’t be a lawyer bcos you can’t work as a lawyer abroad and they said if i immigrate or move elsewhere i won’t be able to work and i’ll struggle
i’ve wanted to be a lawyer for such a long time and know the system to becoming one inside out bcos of how passionate i was abt studying law but they crushed my dreams and now if i pursue law i would feel guiltyOriginal post by TypicalNerd
Don’t change history out for biology.
If you end up doing biology and getting a low grade in it, then it’s possible you’ll get nowhere and your parents will continue being arses to you.
If you stick with history and excel at it (i.e a very realistic possibility), you’ll get somewhere and prove them wrong.
Tell them that your decision is final and that you aren’t going to change it.
If you end up doing biology and getting a low grade in it, then it’s possible you’ll get nowhere and your parents will continue being arses to you.
If you stick with history and excel at it (i.e a very realistic possibility), you’ll get somewhere and prove them wrong.
Tell them that your decision is final and that you aren’t going to change it.
i think that’s what i’m going to do because i honestly just cannot do biology i’ve always found it the most difficult science
i’m just scared bcos my dad wants me to be a doctor bcos i got really good gcse grades and all his brothers have kids that are doctors so i’m being compared to them. i feel guilty studying history even tho i’ve lived history and excelled at it ever since i was in primary school
Look at all these people telling you to do History do what YOU want to do, once you are on the pathway your parents cannot stop you- your parents can't stop you anyway. Try not to worry about being compared to others and feel proud that you are changing the expected path and doing something that you have clearly loved your entire life. This entire thread is behind you!
do what YOU want to do, once you are on the pathway your parents cannot stop you- your parents can't stop you anyway. Try not to worry about being compared to others and feel proud that you are changing the expected path and doing something that you have clearly loved your entire life. This entire thread is behind you!Original post by Anonymous
i think that’s what i’m going to do because i honestly just cannot do biology i’ve always found it the most difficult science
i’m just scared bcos my dad wants me to be a doctor bcos i got really good gcse grades and all his brothers have kids that are doctors so i’m being compared to them. i feel guilty studying history even tho i’ve lived history and excelled at it ever since i was in primary school
i’m just scared bcos my dad wants me to be a doctor bcos i got really good gcse grades and all his brothers have kids that are doctors so i’m being compared to them. i feel guilty studying history even tho i’ve lived history and excelled at it ever since i was in primary school
Original post by LJ234
Look at all these people telling you to do History do what YOU want to do, once you are on the pathway your parents cannot stop you- your parents can't stop you anyway. Try not to worry about being compared to others and feel proud that you are changing the expected path and doing something that you have clearly loved your entire life. This entire thread is behind you!
do what YOU want to do, once you are on the pathway your parents cannot stop you- your parents can't stop you anyway. Try not to worry about being compared to others and feel proud that you are changing the expected path and doing something that you have clearly loved your entire life. This entire thread is behind you!Honestly thank you so much for this!! I was feeling so anxious about this entire thing and I think i’m going to stick with history because I know I would get a better grade in history than biology
Original post by Anonymous
Honestly thank you so much for this!! I was feeling so anxious about this entire thing and I think i’m going to stick with history because I know I would get a better grade in history than biology
Good for you!
Go for it, I know you'll smash it!😊Quick Reply
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