So I'm just finishing first year and pretty sure I'm going to fail one of my modules, worth 20 credits. I think I will scrape by in the other ones, so I should still have 100 credits by the end of the year, but I've just absolutely fumbled my most recent exam for this particular module. It's three exams, I got like 60% or somthing on one, I could have done better but I really messed up and didn't read a bunch of the questions properly. I feel like a right idiot. And then my most recent one was speaking and I just could barely get a sentence out, I'm certain I failed it. Now I have one more tomorrow and I'm realising that I'm totally unprepared, and I've forgotten loads of stuff that we covered last semester.
I know it sounds really bad, but please don't tell me to reconsider uni or my course. I am actually good at it, I promise and I absolutely love it. I just had a family member pass away in March, which triggered my depression a lot and just stuck me in a rut which I'm only just starting to get out of.
I'm really eager to sort myself out over summer now and come back ready next year, but I'm just not really sure what that will look like. Am I likely to have to repeat the whole year, or just the module? And then do you think I'm likely to be able to do it alongside everything else come september. I've heard that you can do summer school and then resit, but this isn't really viable for me as I really need to work over the summer, my uni is really far away and I can't even afford to travel back until september, let alone pay for rent or anything.
Also will this affect my student loans if I do have to repeat?
I'm just really scared about whats going to happen next, I absolutely never thought this would happen to me and I feel so disappointed in myself.
I don't even know if special circs would help at this point, I feel like I've totally failed, besides I don't want to apply for them because I just feel so guilty about it and I don't want to be the one to take advantage of a bad situation.