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Having a best friend of the opposite sex

Hi I’m a 30 year old male, and I was wondering is appropriate to have a female as a best friend even if I am not interested in her romantically?

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Original post by Fintan1993
Hi I’m a 30 year old male, and I was wondering is appropriate to have a female as a best friend even if I am not interested in her romantically?


That's fine, so long as you aren't dating anyone. If you are, then it might end up being a problem.
Reply 2
Original post by ThatOldGuy
That's fine, so long as you aren't dating anyone. If you are, then it might end up being a problem.
But

Yeah whenever I hangout with her, others I know think me and her are together. Having a best friend of the opposite sex is an amazing feeling.
Reply 3
Original post by Fintan1993
Hi I’m a 30 year old male, and I was wondering is appropriate to have a female as a best friend even if I am not interested in her romantically?

Not at all. Why do you even think like that? Friends are friends and it's absolutely fine having friends of the opposite sex as long as there's no romantic relationship.
Reply 4
Original post by Meheraj
Not at all. Why do you even think like that? Friends are friends and it's absolutely fine having friends of the opposite sex as long as there's no romantic relationship.


Yeah that’s right, and I enjoy mucking around and having a joke with them.
Reply 5
Original post by Fintan1993
Yeah that’s right, and I enjoy mucking around and having a joke with them.

That's great. I also love doing such even though it could be seen differently in different parts of the world but I reckon everything is alright when the intention is right.
Reply 6
Original post by Meheraj
That's great. I also love doing such even though it could be seen differently in different parts of the world but I reckon everything is alright when the intention is right.


I remember back in 2016 I met a girl named Ashley, and me and her we were good mates. We met at a support group/youth group, and I asked her for dating advice and she told me it will happen it just takes time.
Reply 7
Original post by Fintan1993
I remember back in 2016 I met a girl named Ashley, and me and her we were good mates. We met at a support group/youth group, and I asked her for dating advice and she told me it will happen it just takes time.

Yeah, she was right. It takes time for some individuals to find the right people in life.

I would say having close female friends is a blessing. One can comprehend the perspectives of females, ask for advice and so on.
Reply 8
Original post by Meheraj
Yeah, she was right. It takes time for some individuals to find the right people in life.

I would say having close female friends is a blessing. One can comprehend the perspectives of females, ask for advice and so on.


But with Ashley she was like having an another little sister, but yeah me and her just clicked.
Reply 9
Of course it is appropriate.
Reply 10
Original post by Gazpacho.
Of course it is appropriate.

There are some girls that can only take jokes to a certain point and then can get upset about it. But if you do unfortunately get on a girl’s bad side, it’s best to not argue with them and let them calm themselves down.
Reply 11
Original post by Fintan1993
But with Ashley she was like having an another little sister, but yeah me and her just clicked.

Good for you.
Reply 12
Sure, it's the best thing ever.
Reply 13
Original post by Kathy89
Sure, it's the best thing ever.

I take you are best friends with someone of the opposite sex.
Reply 14
Original post by Fintan1993
I take you are best friends with someone of the opposite sex.


I can say even more. I'm best friends with my ex. I also have more guy friends than gal friends...
Original post by Fintan1993
Hi I’m a 30 year old male, and I was wondering is appropriate to have a female as a best friend even if I am not interested in her romantically?


If you both vibe well and genuinely enjoy each other's company, then no reason why you shouldn't. However, be prepared for nosey people to gossip / speculate about you though (I'm assuming you're not gay lol).

If you're not too bothered about that, then go for it.

Original post by ThatOldGuy
That's fine, so long as you aren't dating anyone. If you are, then it might end up being a problem.


Depends on the attitude and/ or jealousy of your / her partner.

Original post by Meheraj
Not at all. Why do you even think like that? Friends are friends and it's absolutely fine having friends of the opposite sex as long as there's no romantic relationship.


Well a lot of people don't think it's possible for (straight) men and women to ever be "just friends". I would like to stress this is NOT my opinion, but the view of many others.

Original post by Kathy89
I can say even more. I'm best friends with my ex. I also have more guy friends than gal friends...


Some would say that because he's your ex, there was a romantic / sexual aspect; therefore it's not strictly platonic.

But yeah, I know some girls who prefer to hang out with guys, as we're much simpler (generally what you see is what you get... also, there's no where as much b******g or cattiness with guys). Ditto with some guys who aren't interested in the usual guy stuff (e.g. sports, cars etc.)
Reply 16
Original post by Old Skool Freak
Some would say that because he's your ex, there was a romantic / sexual aspect; therefore it's not strictly platonic.

We no longer have a romantic attraction.

Original post by Old Skool Freak
But yeah, I know some girls who prefer to hang out with guys, as we're much simpler (generally what you see is what you get... also, there's no where as much b******g or cattiness with guys). Ditto with some guys who aren't interested in the usual guy stuff (e.g. sports, cars etc.)


I'm the one who is more into guys stuff like sports and gaming.
Original post by Fintan1993
Hi I’m a 30 year old male, and I was wondering is appropriate to have a female as a best friend even if I am not interested in her romantically?

Oh yea.

One of my best friends was a Venezuelan gal. She didn't have any money and I got 2 hundred dollars in food aid monthly. She had a degree in metalurgy and a foul mouth. Spanish is a great language for invectives.

We ate more ribeyes than f@@k. Being poor sucked red balls!

This is a question that you need not ask. Who you love (friends) is your business, full stop.

I get why you would care what others think. STOP caring! Do what's good for YOU! Care about yourself and sack up!
Reply 18
Original post by Old Skool Freak
Well a lot of people don't think it's possible for (straight) men and women to ever be "just friends". I would like to stress this is NOT my opinion, but the view of many others.

Yeah, I noticed it too. That's how others can think and even my college principal used to say that a boy (straight) and a girl (straight) can never be friends. But I neither cared about it then nor now personally since I look at things differently. I feel it wouldn't be an issue as long as my (male) and my friend's (female) intentions are clear to each other. So, I would say it completely depends on individuals rather than anyone else.
Original post by Fintan1993
Hi I’m a 30 year old male, and I was wondering is appropriate to have a female as a best friend even if I am not interested in her romantically?

It's absolutely fine. I am 21 and my best friend is like my sister, we've been best mates since first year of primary school. Quite frankly, if you are not happy with your other half having a best friend of the opposite sex, you are either controlling, have trust issues or are jealous. If you maybe have personal issues, maybe you have been cheated on in the past then the anxiety there is understandable but there needs to be an open conversation of you both listening to each other.. not just letting each other speak in turn.

A relationship should not be a sacrifice and no one should have to sacrifice a best mate (or anyone come to that) just because their other half wants that title.
(edited 1 month ago)

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