Struggling to make friends at Uni

I know uni has only just started but it feels as through groups are already forming. I’ve joined societies and I’ve been going to their events but I feel like the odd one out going to them alone when everyone else is with someone. I’ve spoken to a lot of people but it really doesn’t go anywhere from that one occasion or conversation since it feels like they’ve already got people. I might be overreacting but just wanted to know if anyone’s been in the same position

Reply 1

Scienceisgood

21

You wonder if anyone has been in that position? I promise you at least 30% of the population has been in that position (you’re not the only introvert out there, trust me).

Took me a while to make mates at uni (having left five years ago and going back to do my MSc now), it’s even more difficult for me as all my housemates are around 8 years younger than me (minimum).

Just go out to societies and try and strike up a conversation and try and make it progress naturally. You’ll be surprised how far a conversation can go over a drink or a burger and chips at times. 😐

Reply 2

Anonymous #2

Original post by Anonymous

I know uni has only just started but it feels as through groups are already forming. I’ve joined societies and I’ve been going to their events but I feel like the odd one out going to them alone when everyone else is with someone. I’ve spoken to a lot of people but it really doesn’t go anywhere from that one occasion or conversation since it feels like they’ve already got people. I might be overreacting but just wanted to know if anyone’s been in the same position

Hey, please try not to worry too much :smile:

Although it seem that way, I promise you there are no groups yet. People have definitely banded together but these aren't friend groups, just a collection of people who have met once or twice previously and are looking to make friends.

Most are still trying to find "their" people so please don't stop trying! Best thing to do if you feel as though it's not going anywhere is to do something and invite people along with you or ask to tag along with someone and their "group" as you have nobody. Most are very open to being friends so they should say yes! You'll get to meet more people that way too :smile:

Reply 3

Uni of Southampton Students

Official Rep

15

Original post by Anonymous

I know uni has only just started but it feels as through groups are already forming. I’ve joined societies and I’ve been going to their events but I feel like the odd one out going to them alone when everyone else is with someone. I’ve spoken to a lot of people but it really doesn’t go anywhere from that one occasion or conversation since it feels like they’ve already got people. I might be overreacting but just wanted to know if anyone’s been in the same position

Hi

Its great to hear from you and although it may not feel like it many people feel like this in the first few weeks of uni. However, I recognise that you may be feeling alone try organising an event such as a flat dinner or simply going on a walk with someone. It can feel like this because at the beginning everyone is trying to find the group that’s right for them and it can take time to realise the meaningful relationships they have formed. For example one of my closest friends I did not meet till Easter in my first year so there is hope and just stick at it.
However, if you find yourself still struggling there is plenty of support available through your University, Student Union and online charities.

I hope this helps and enjoy the rest of first year 😊
Please let me know if you have any further questions.

Caitlin
BSc Children’s Nursing
University of Southampton Official Rep

Reply 4

jobojobojoboxxx

7

Hi, this is extremely common. I know many students who are going through the exact same scenario and students who have done so in previous years. You just need to keep putting yourself out there and understand that may students feel this way. Friendships take time to evolve and although it looks like many others have formed their friendship groups many will not last or will change. Uni is a marathon not a sprint so have faith that you will find your tribe but it takes time. Just don't panic in the meantime. Try being comfortable in this uncomfortable state. It's not forever. Good luck.

Struggling to make friends at Uni

Quick Reply

Related discussions

Latest

Trending

Trending

Articles for you