Friends at uni

I struggled making friends my whole uni time, feel so lonely still. In my final year and it’s been nothing like I expect uni to be. Has anyone else struggled making friends? Feels like I’m doing something wrong or I’m just not likeable iygm

Reply 1

M.Grace.B

6

I'm sorry to hear about your situation - how disappointing and lonely it must all have been for you ):
Hang in there for the remainder of final year - It's never too late to make a friend! Even if not, graduating and going on to greater things will surely push you towards a brighter future.
I've not got to Uni quite yet but I stuggled making friends all through the second-half of GCSE and A-Levels (even slightly within my own career) but I make attempts to improve my situation and to find new oppurtunities to recreate myself.
If it's communication you struggle with then I really recommend listening to some podcasts about proactive listening - it really advances how approachable you are.
If it's anxiety then try some exposure therapy by stepping out of your comfort zone - try some mixers or look for online forums of people discussing hobbies that you like maybe?
I'm lucky at my homebase because I have a wicked group of friends but I found them when we were all younger. I will add that we were all outcasts, however! Try finding some outcasts and make sure to stay open-minded about everyones differences.

This all seems so hard right now, I'm sure. But, really, you're so young and there will be ample oppurtunites in your future to make friends - as long as you're ready to start making them!! I've been where you are and I found my people - I hope you'll be just as lucky as me (:
All my luck,
Bee

Reply 2

Wired_1800

20

Original post by Ktja

I struggled making friends my whole uni time, feel so lonely still. In my final year and it’s been nothing like I expect uni to be. Has anyone else struggled making friends? Feels like I’m doing something wrong or I’m just not likeable iygm

It depends on what you have been doing. Friendship is not one-sided where you expect people to make the effort while you sit back.

You should join clubs, societies and other events. Put yourself out there and actively seek to meet new people. An unknown fact about life is that many people tend to feel the same way as us, so they would be waiting for others to make the move.

Original post by Ktja

I struggled making friends my whole uni time, feel so lonely still. In my final year and it’s been nothing like I expect uni to be. Has anyone else struggled making friends? Feels like I’m doing something wrong or I’m just not likeable iygm

It can be really tough to find a good group of friends, or even one great friend, and it can take time to build those relationships.

It's also very normal to take time making friends, I didn't find my group of friends until my 3rd year of uni. My advice would be don't worry if there's already an established group or 'clique' - that doesn't mean they're not open to having more friends. You might be surprised at how many people do actually want to make friends with you but just may be a bit shy.

I also suggest you try joining a society that you're interested in. They're a brilliant way to meet new people and you're likely to hit it off with other people due to your common interest. It's difficult but try to be brave and put yourself out there. Even studying on campus and engaging with familiar faces in the library could help - it definitely helped me make friends.

Good luck!

Friends at uni

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