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feel uncomfortable and kinda scared of him

i'm an undergrad at uni, just started this year 2 months ago and i have met a wide range of ppl, one being a postgrad who's age is a mystery coz he wont reveal it but hes oldest sibling whos brother is 21 and hes a 'few years older' so i'm guessing hes 25+.

i met him at a commuting social as well as some other ppl. he kept on touching me sometimes and i told him to stop and shifted away and then after we got each other contact and texted for a bit.
1 month later we meet and it gets weird, over text beforehand, he kept on complimenting me and even looking through my bag when i was trying to find something in it, touching my stuff, and it felt kinda creepy. i'm 19 so technically not a minor but it felt weird and not right. when we met he kept touching me again and compliments keep coming, making my feel icky and uncomfortable. he even acknowledged himself that i am young and he is older. we met for only like 20mins coz i felt uncomfortable and wanted to skiddadle and had a seminar.
since then i told my mum and some family members and they said he is a bit of a creep and to give a wide berth with him. the age gap is weird and also he is twice my size.
he then keeps messaging me saying if i want to meetup, i am dry and also say i'm not interested but he still persists to the point he says 'i have a free house' which was just enough for me and i removed him. not blocked, just removed.

i'm kinda scared he will find me on campus and make a whole deal out of it in public and have a go at me . i've removed him and he only got 1 year so he'll be gone but i'm kinda scared and just really uncomfortable and creeped out.

what should i do?? ://
Reply 1
Original post by Anonymous
i'm an undergrad at uni, just started this year 2 months ago and i have met a wide range of ppl, one being a postgrad who's age is a mystery coz he wont reveal it but hes oldest sibling whos brother is 21 and hes a 'few years older' so i'm guessing hes 25+.

i met him at a commuting social as well as some other ppl. he kept on touching me sometimes and i told him to stop and shifted away and then after we got each other contact and texted for a bit.
1 month later we meet and it gets weird, over text beforehand, he kept on complimenting me and even looking through my bag when i was trying to find something in it, touching my stuff, and it felt kinda creepy. i'm 19 so technically not a minor but it felt weird and not right. when we met he kept touching me again and compliments keep coming, making my feel icky and uncomfortable. he even acknowledged himself that i am young and he is older. we met for only like 20mins coz i felt uncomfortable and wanted to skiddadle and had a seminar.
since then i told my mum and some family members and they said he is a bit of a creep and to give a wide berth with him. the age gap is weird and also he is twice my size.
he then keeps messaging me saying if i want to meetup, i am dry and also say i'm not interested but he still persists to the point he says 'i have a free house' which was just enough for me and i removed him. not blocked, just removed.

i'm kinda scared he will find me on campus and make a whole deal out of it in public and have a go at me . i've removed him and he only got 1 year so he'll be gone but i'm kinda scared and just really uncomfortable and creeped out.

what should i do?? ://

Hey,

I think you made the right choice removing him and that's a great first step. Hopefully he will get the hint and leave you alone - has he tried contacting you since then? If he is persistent and starts to harass you I would block him and inform the university. They might be able to put something in place to make you feel safer on campus. If you're not comfortable doing that though, I would make sure that if you know you're going to be spending the day on campus, like in the library all day, you have a friend with you. That way you always have someone there as a sort of safety barrier until you establish what his reaction will be.

I had a similar thing happen to me in first year where a lab technician would flirt with me in the lab even though I was always dry to him. He then found my instagram over the summer which considering he only knew my first name and I never gave him my handle was slightly creepy. I stoped responding to his messages and luckily he graduated and got a new job so the problem went away. A similar thing might happen here - his pride could be too hurt to confront you, he could become wrapped up in his masters, he might go on placement you never know! So I would try not to be too scared but also play it safe for a few months as a just in case! :smile:
Reply 2
Original post by hannah6754
Hey,

I think you made the right choice removing him and that's a great first step. Hopefully he will get the hint and leave you alone - has he tried contacting you since then? If he is persistent and starts to harass you I would block him and inform the university. They might be able to put something in place to make you feel safer on campus. If you're not comfortable doing that though, I would make sure that if you know you're going to be spending the day on campus, like in the library all day, you have a friend with you. That way you always have someone there as a sort of safety barrier until you establish what his reaction will be.

I had a similar thing happen to me in first year where a lab technician would flirt with me in the lab even though I was always dry to him. He then found my instagram over the summer which considering he only knew my first name and I never gave him my handle was slightly creepy. I stoped responding to his messages and luckily he graduated and got a new job so the problem went away. A similar thing might happen here - his pride could be too hurt to confront you, he could become wrapped up in his masters, he might go on placement you never know! So I would try not to be too scared but also play it safe for a few months as a just in case! :smile:

thank u so much, yeah i might do that and hopefully it should be all good and the issue should go away. thanks for ur help, also sorry to hear a similar thing happened to u too and i hope ur alr now 🙂
Gosh he sounds like a wrong un, run away

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