I guess she's not really my ex but I can explain. It was never really a real real relationship, we lived far away. I only got to see her in person maybe like 4 or 5 times. Sometimes I doubted us, or ever considered cutting it off, but I never did, because at the end of the day I loved it. About a month at a half to two months ago she suddenly told me she didn't think she wanted us to continue talking. At the time I told her that was fine, whatever was best for her is what I wanted but it still hurt. I was also friends with one of her best friends and ended up seeming a bit too friendly, I never had any intentions but I ended up projecting the piece of our relationship that I missed onto her. I've tried texting her but ofc she knows that happened and I feel horrible. She hasn't unadded me so I still see her, and can text her even though I know I shouldn't. I want to text or call her so bad, and tell her I'm sorry and that I was stupid. and how much she always meant to me, and how she made my life better, and how I miss talking to her, and her being the only person in the world who truly cared about me always no matter what, and how if I had known she had felt like that and why I would've done it all over again, just to make her as happy as she should've been. But I don't think I should, or that I am even allowed to. I am so ******* depressed all the time and I don't know what to do. We never kissed, or did anything more or else, but somehow I can't let go. How do you guys do it?