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ive had 5 crushes over the past 4 and a half years and havent asked out any of them

ive barely spoken to the last 2, am i a loser for this
Original post by deez nuts moment
ive barely spoken to the last 2, am i a loser for this

Only in the sense that you've lost the opportunity to get to know them.
Original post by DataVenia
Only in the sense that you've lost the opportunity to get to know them.

but i dont think this is normal. i at least should have spoken to them but i cant
Original post by deez nuts moment
but i dont think this is normal. i at least should have spoken to them but i cant

Agreed. But that's not the question you asked. You asked "am i a loser for this"? My response therefore stands.

If you're actual question is, "Is this normal?" then I'd say it's not normal but it's very common. I'm really no expert here, but I suspect that the issue might be that you are focusing on trying to speak to your "crushes", where you really want the conversation to go well. That puts a lot of pressure on the conversation (and you) to deliver. So, instead, don't try to strike up conversations with people where it's important that you impress them somehow; strike up conversations with "regular" folk. If the conversation goes well, great. If it doesn't, you've lost nothing.

Keep dong this and one of two things will happen. You'll gain enough confidence / experience to talk to the person you really want to speak to, or you'll form a good friendship (or more) with the person you opted to speak to instead.

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