Hi, I’ve been wanting to drop out since the middle of first year but fear, anxiety and family pressures have stopped me until now. I’m in second year and in the last term but I have been miserable ever since now that I think back on it. I commute and haven’t really participated in anything because of my circumstance. The degree is not bad. It’s actually decent but I don’t have any interest in it at all. I don’t think I would have ever picked it if I hadn’t been pressured to go to university. I really regret caving in.
I’ve been avoiding confronting it for a while because at first I thought it would be good for me to continue. I kept thinking logically about it, repressing everything I felt and now I’m here in this impossible situation. I know people would say “Keep continuing you only have a few months left anyways.” but I’m not sure I would actually get a good grade at the end of it because it’s impacting on my mental health and I’ve skipped so many weeks this term that I honestly have no clue what I’m doing.
I don’t have a backup plan other than get a job and try to move out from my household that isn’t great. But then, I would still have to lie about it because it’s embarrassing telling my parents I dropped out after pursuing this degree that a. was a result of a random choice and a half hearted interest in it at first and b. not a STEM degree like they wanted.
I’m sort of terrified and need some advice because at this point I don’t think I can do any of this alone or keep repressing stuff.