Advice needed

So, since I was young my parents have always said that they give me the freedom to choose whatever career I want to go into, even when relatives come and say that my parents should allow me to do whatever I want, they always say that it will always be my choice.

Until recently.

I am going to be starting my A levels next year and have had my mind set on that. I want to become a solicitor because I would love to have a job that involves having clients that I'll be personally helping and also fulfil my dream of becoming a lawyer.

But my dad's friend has told him that a job as an ''Immigration officer is great''. And so my dad is set on me doing that job. Whenever I say that no I don't want to and that I just won't enjoy the job, he says that he doesn't enjoy his job and that I should just quit being difficult. When I asked him why he wants me to become one he said that being a ''officer'' fits on the tongue and is valued - something that he'll ''put on his Facebook page and show his friends.''

I've done research on the job and it' just isn't for me. I can't see myself doing it and it's just frustrating that all these years they've said that they'll listen to me but now when the time for me to decide is coming nearer, they are going against what they say.

My Mum had initially tried to explain to my dad that he shouldn't force it but the very next day she goes, ''What's wrong with doing what your dad says? He wants the best for you so you should just listen to him.''

I'm the oldest daughter so if I let my parents control this, they'll also be controlling my siblings later on and I can't let that happen.

What can I do?

Reply 1

DataVenia

Volunteer Team, Clearing and Applications Advisor

Original post by Anonymous

What can I do?

You can simply ignore him. You pick A levels which would be appropriate for a career as a solicitor, without explaining that's what you've done.

If he's so easily impressed by the word "officer" in the "Immigration Officer" job title, and is so easily influenced by his friend recommending the job, then he's unlikely to have researched good A levels for the career he wants you to have - and I don't know what those A levels would be anyway. (Apologies if this sounds rude towards him.)

That kicks the can two years down the road. When it comes to choosing a degree (which I assume is the route you'd take to become a solicitor), you might have a hard time convincing him that a Law degree would be relevant for an Immigration Officer. But you'd explain that the role has a clear relationship with immigration law, and ensuring that people are not in breach of it.

Once you graduate with a Law degree, and start looking for work as a solicitor, you'll have moved out of home (most likely) and be a fully-fledged adult. You can therefore do whatever you like. :smile:

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

Original post by DataVenia

You can simply ignore him. You pick A levels which would be appropriate for a career as a solicitor, without explaining that's what you've done.
If he's so easily impressed by the word "officer" in the "Immigration Officer" job title, and is so easily influenced by his friend recommending the job, then he's unlikely to have researched good A levels for the career he wants you to have - and I don't know what those A levels would be anyway. (Apologies if this sounds rude towards him.)
That kicks the can two years down the road. When it comes to choosing a degree (which I assume is the route you'd take to become a solicitor), you might have a hard time convincing him that a Law degree would be relevant for an Immigration Officer. But you'd explain that the role has a clear relationship with immigration law, and ensuring that people are not in breach of it.
Once you graduate with a Law degree, and start looking for work as a solicitor, you'll have moved out of home (most likely) and be a fully-fledged adult. You can therefore do whatever you like. :smile:

Thanks for the advice!

I've thought of doing biology, psychology and economics for A level and I've made it clear that I'll be doing my A levels next year. My Dad is still a bit annoying and keeping saying that my sister will make him proud instead. Ah well.

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Original post by Anonymous #1

Thanks for the advice!
I've thought of doing biology, psychology and economics for A level and I've made it clear that I'll be doing my A levels next year. My Dad is still a bit annoying and keeping saying that my sister will make him proud instead. Ah well.