BF made me feel crap about sex

My tip for not feeling like crap would be to dump him and to date someone with a shred of emotional maturity.

I've been seeing this guy (my bf) for about a few months, we only rekindled our relationship as we dated 4 years prior and broke up over summer, only to reconnect again im 22 F and hes 23 M. I've been a virgin up until 2024, now I obvs am aware that pain is normal etc, as is bleeding but after three seperate incidences i've been bleeding post-coital. Anyway, I think he was just messing around infront of my friends on a gc, and I told him to just stop (I knew I didn't want any private moments being shared on a gc with all of my mates on it), he then jokingly said that i didn't tell him to stop the other night, so I rightfully and honestly said that I told him to slow down and stop a fair few times, which he did- as the pain for me was unbearable to the point where I began to cry. I felt like due to this pain being so unbearable and being different severity to the previous two times we've tried to have s*x i then said how he probably took it slow till he was all the way in to which he claimed he wasn't and that I only took about half his size to which I admit kind of hurt me because I personally felt like due to this pain I was handling a lot more than i handled the last two attempts. I explained this and he said that it wasn't his fault, that he didn't understand what I expected him to do about this with and I quote saying "do you want me to reduce my size or something?" to which i angrily responded that he should just find someone else who he wouldn't have these issues with...he then commented "one who wouldn't bleed after having a normal sized d"ck in her?" this comment hurt me the most especially because the night before I had been bleeding and passing blood clots. I just feel like for the amount of pain I endured and everything after that I deserved a lot more respect and I feel utterly like I'm just abnormal or not good enough. Besides wanting to wait for this weekend to end so I can book in a GP appointment is there any tips that I should do for not feeling like crap, and should I forgive him, as I also shouldn't have been bitter.. any ideas?

You clearly deserve a LOT better than him. Personally I would dump him (I am male by the way) and chill for a while until you find someone better. It is NOT your Fault it is HIS fault so do not go thinking it is any of yours. It isn't.

Thank you, I did deflect a lot of blame onto him, but I felt I only did that because I was angry that he wasn't getting the memo, the pain I had felt was incredibly immense and here he was on a gc full of people saying that I actually hadn't taken in as much as I personally thought I did, and despite me being in denial, I felt that he could've been more sensitive about the issue, knowing that I had been upset, that this was hugely personal that I was uncomfortable. It was such a change as on that day he was comforting me making sure I was okay we were communicating throughout that whole process, and I thought that the pain I had felt was almost worth it if that makes sense- but to hear that he didn't even go that far and for him to say that infront of everybody or not clock onto why I was getting so angry and so bitter I felt like he was insensitive with it. I also feel like he shouldn't have been saying this on a public groupchat with my friends on it at all...

After appointment see what Dr says, then discuss it with him. See his reaction, then decide