A homosexual muslim's dilemma.

I understand your dilemma, I really do.

You are aware of Islam's stance on homosexuality and its rulings; it's highly probable that your family members and Muslim friends do too. If there's a possibility your relatives may not be so open-minded regarding your sexuality, I would not suggest telling them just yet. Although I cannot stress the importance of telling your parents, perhaps not today, and perhaps not even tomorrow, but there will come a time where you will have to openly admit that you are a homosexual.

You seem certain about your sexuality and I believe you require support and impartial advice, rather than being labelled by the Islamic society. Your parents may be ashamed, your relatives may blame your Western upbringing, your male friends may start to avoid you. This, I would say, seems very likely, only because Islam and homosexuality are polar opposites. I would suggest you take a step away from Islam for a moment and think about yourself as am individual. There is more to Islam than your sexuality, just like there is more to Islam than a girl's virginity, wearing a headscarf, drinking alcohol and fasting. People sometimes make bad choices in life, especially in mainstream society, where temptation surrounds us all, but this does not make us bad people.

There is no need for you to feel the need to reconcile with your religion, otherwise we would all have to find the means to do the same. I have not met a single Muslim who has abode by the words of Allah 100%

Seams to me that your religion is oppressing you and causing you fear of not being accepted for who you are, do you really want to be part of that?

(Before I begin, I just want to say that I know the stance of homosexuality within Islam and it's rulings and that I do adhere to my religion and no, homosexuality is not a choice).

I am a gay muslim and wanted to get some advice. Apart from 2 people, no one knows that I am gay. Trying to reconcile my homosexuality with Islam has been hard, to say the least, and it doesn't help that I have hardly anyone to talk to about this, hence why I am making this thread.

What can I do to reconcile with myself, instead of going into a pit of depression, anxiety and self hatred, which I am slowly going into? Telling anyone within the family or the muslim community would be social suicide and I would treated as someone with an incurable highly infectious disease. Any advice would be appreciated, particularly from any other gay muslims.

Thank you so much for your response.

My parents will Never be open minded about it, and I'm not even talking about anything sexual or relationship wise, just the fact that I'm attracted to men will most likely make everyone hate me, even though I never chose to be this way. Most of my family and family friends are extremely islamic minded in this topic, which I find hypocritical as they are not so extreme in other topics.

I would never tell my friends that I am homosexual. Some of them have vehemently opposed it, calling it a fetish and the others don't understand the issue however, both groups would out me instantly. Since I'm not out to them, I feel like that I'm betraying them, in a way, as they don't know who I Really am, and on top of that betraying myself.

Feelings of loneliness and helplessness have lead me down to how I'm feeling.

You Can be gay and muslim, however you risk the punishment of Allah on the day of judgement.

I dont know what to tell you, its a tough one.

If you want ur religion then u have no choice but to keep our feelings to yourself

If your feelings overpower your religious beliefs then I suppose you just come out and leave your religion.

Thats as blunt as it can get, good luck.

How close are you to your parents? As people have said, I wouldn't advise telling them just yet, but most parents instinctively want the best for their children. Is it possible they would actually try to help you, and be able to keep it a secret, or would their religion always come first? I'm sorry if I don't properly understand.

Assuming that you couldn't tell anybody in your family, have you looked for support groups for other homosexual muslims? They must exist, though I'd imagine they are hard to find. A quick google search came up with;

http://imaanlondon.wordpress.com/

This may require a bit more research - I don't know if they would aim to 'cure' you, or help you. However, if it is a legitimate support group I think you would benefit from meeting people with the same problems in person.

If anything they'd be betraying you for not accepting you.

(Before I begin, I just want to say that I know the stance of homosexuality within Islam and it's rulings and that I do adhere to my religion and no, homosexuality is not a choice).

I am a gay muslim and wanted to get some advice. Apart from 2 people, no one knows that I am gay. Trying to reconcile my homosexuality with Islam has been hard, to say the least, and it doesn't help that I have hardly anyone to talk to about this, hence why I am making this thread.

What can I do to reconcile with myself, instead of going into a pit of depression, anxiety and self hatred, which I am slowly going into? Telling anyone within the family or the muslim community would be social suicide and I would treated as someone with an incurable highly infectious disease. Any advice would be appreciated, particularly from any other gay muslims.

LGBTQIA in Islam?

http://mohamedghilan.com/2013/02/01/lgbtqia-islam-2/

Have a read...

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Thanks for responding.

Islam deals with the topic of the actual action, not the feelings associated with it. Islam has nothing against homosexual on the surface as long as it is not followed up by actions. What is oppressing me, however, are the people that have a very very backward mentality on the topic of homosexuality, muslim or not. Many people believe this as a horrific disease and for some time I thought of it like this as well until I found out that homosexuality is the product of physiological and genetic factors. The problem is not Islam, the problem is educating the people.

Where Islam comes into is that as a homosexual, I will not be able to have that emotional or sexual experience with a man, which in itself depresses me.

I'm a Muslim and I really sympathise with you, being homosexual is a definite no-no in Islam. Honestly and realistically it would be for your own well being if you didn't tell your family because this will make matters worse. I can only imagine what you're going through and having to do it alone doesn't help. I can't say I'm a properly religious Muslim but I would advise you to try and ask Allah for help and guidance.
Feel free to pm me.