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Were you bullied, what was the worst thing they did?

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Reply 100
Original post by Quiet _One86
Thank you, and pray that story is true, and continues. I guess with good guidance and supported students there isn't room to bully. I hear stories of it happening and it sickens me because an unhappy child is a bully or being bullied, and they should break that and be friends because they are both equally unhappy and perhaps if they were friends they would make each other happier.


Well it's life I guess, I mean everyone gets bullied at least once in their life right? It's their ability to show resilience and be the better person which is the important factor...at least that's what we were taught at school in year 7,8,9 and 10 over and over again. :rolleyes:
Luckily I've never experienced anything terrible, but I was picked on in year 7 and 8. At first, it was one girl who picked on me, but her friends didn't do anything at all to stop it. I think the worst thing was when they lied to other people about things that I had apparently said - really mean, awful things that I would NEVER think of saying. It hurt to have everyone think I was a complete cow, even though I had never said any of those things about anyone. Hopefully they realised later it was all bullsh*t.

Then I moved tutors, and although I had friends, it continued. Nothing physical, just the odd comments, dirty looks, whispers and giggles as you walk by. It's silly but it affects your confidence so badly. I also walked in on a girl doing a ridiculous impression of me once in front of the rest of my class, hurt like hell. Looking back it was completely stupid - nothing like me whatsoever! (which is what my true friends said at the time) - but the fact that she was trying to make me look stupid was bewildering and pretty painful.

Thankfully things got better, I made more friends, started to fit in more which helped it to stop. But I am still quite self-conscious which definitely stems from the bullying of those first years at secondary school.

A few years later, I got to know a former close friend of the first girl who had bullied me. We got on really well, and one day she said - "I cannot believe we were so mean to such a genuinely nice person, I am so sorry for not doing anything" etc. She wrote it in my leavers' book. We still get on well, and I'm really grateful for what she said. She is a lovely person, and I guess she was just "going along" with it due to peer pressure, and I know she had her own problems too. Another one of the girls sent me a message over Facebook to apologise. The one who actually did the bullying has never said a thing to me though! :rolleyes: Pfft.

I've also had a few random people say things in the street for no apparent reason - when I was in year 10, some guy laughed as I walked past and I heard him tell his friend I was ugly. A couple of other things like that have happened. The only explanation I have is that I must have looked at them funny by accident, or maybe they were just total pricks, I have no idea.

At the time, I assumed all these things were said because I had some huge flaw - I was hideous, a horrible or boring person, fat, weird, terribly unfashionable, I don't know. But it's only looking back that I can see I was a perfectly normal, quiet, nice girl. Not beautiful but far from ugly and I certainly wasn't fat or anything like that. So I don't know why people said what they did :dontknow:

For anyone out there reading this thread, who is being bullied, stay strong and know that it will get better. In a few years you'll look back at what happened and see those bullies for the pathetic people that they are - you may even feel sorry for them. They're not doing what they're doing because there's something wrong with YOU, they're doing it because there's something wrong with THEM. Don't listen to them.

:console:
Original post by ergo30
Well it's life I guess, I mean everyone gets bullied at least once in their life right? It's their ability to show resilience and be the better person which is the important factor...at least that's what we were taught at school in year 7,8,9 and 10 over and over again. :rolleyes:


I guess, but if you are strong enough and happy that it was just a stage in your life, but I guess if the bullies at the time had a point, it sticks with you a little longer.
Original post by emilie18
Luckily I've never experienced anything terrible, but I was picked on in year 7 and 8. At first, it was one girl who picked on me, but her friends didn't do anything at all to stop it. I think the worst thing was when they lied to other people about things that I had apparently said - really mean, awful things that I would NEVER think of saying. It hurt to have everyone think I was a complete cow, even though I had never said any of those things about anyone. Hopefully they realised later it was all bullsh*t.

Then I moved tutors, and although I had friends, it continued. Nothing physical, just the odd comments, dirty looks, whispers and giggles as you walk by. It's silly but it affects your confidence so badly. I also walked in on a girl doing a ridiculous impression of me once in front of the rest of my class, hurt like hell. Looking back it was completely stupid - nothing like me whatsoever! (which is what my true friends said at the time) - but the fact that she was trying to make me look stupid was bewildering and pretty painful.

Thankfully things got better, I made more friends, started to fit in more which helped it to stop. But I am still quite self-conscious which definitely stems from the bullying of those first years at secondary school.

A few years later, I got to know a former close friend of the first girl who had bullied me. We got on really well, and one day she said - "I cannot believe we were so mean to such a genuinely nice person, I am so sorry for not doing anything" etc. She wrote it in my leavers' book. We still get on well, and I'm really grateful for what she said. She is a lovely person, and I guess she was just "going along" with it due to peer pressure, and I know she had her own problems too. Another one of the girls sent me a message over Facebook to apologise. The one who actually did the bullying has never said a thing to me though! :rolleyes: Pfft.

I've also had a few random people say things in the street for no apparent reason - when I was in year 10, some guy laughed as I walked past and I heard him tell his friend I was ugly. A couple of other things like that have happened. The only explanation I have is that I must have looked at them funny by accident, or maybe they were just total pricks, I have no idea.

At the time, I assumed all these things were said because I had some huge flaw - I was hideous, a horrible or boring person, fat, weird, terribly unfashionable, I don't know. But it's only looking back that I can see I was a perfectly normal, quiet, nice girl. Not beautiful but far from ugly and I certainly wasn't fat or anything like that. So I don't know why people said what they did :dontknow:

For anyone out there reading this thread, who is being bullied, stay strong and know that it will get better. In a few years you'll look back at what happened and see those bullies for the pathetic people that they are - you may even feel sorry for them. They're not doing what they're doing because there's something wrong with YOU, they're doing it because there's something wrong with THEM. Don't listen to them.

:console:

Thank you and well done for taking the time to write this, and I hope that you hold onto your words, if ever you have to face this in any way. I am thankful, that I am stronger and wiser now than I was, and I am happier to move on from the cowards that bullied me, and the friends that didn't stick around because I don't think I would of known how to be a good friend then any way.
Original post by Hanvyj
I find it really strange when bullies are quite nice later. There was one kid who got an award for doing some charity work at my school and he was praised as a "nice lad", in my experience he was a complete thug - I met him later and he just seemed normal.

Regarding being over-sensitive. To me, its bullying if the person is trying to hurt you - if they are just joking (although clearly it can go too far) then you just need to be thick skinned - people aren't trying to hurt you.


People grow up perhaps.
Wasn't bullied but I got as good as I gave out in high school. I suppose it was banter at the time but now looking back there are things I said and done that I thought were hilarious at the time, but was clearly taking it too far.
Original post by Kiss
Usually violence but it lessened when I stood up for myself once and hit one of them in the face.


:cool:
Reply 107
In Year 6 a boy at the park threw sand in my face and then in my ear. That was probably the most upsetting thing that's every happened to me, but I had my hair pulled on the bus for maybe five stops before I said anything, and that made me really sad actually. That was last year. Yesterday as well, a boy in Year 7 started singing Gangnam Style in my face because I'm Asian...strangely though, he was Filipino...
Original post by Quiet _One86
Thank you and well done for taking the time to write this, and I hope that you hold onto your words, if ever you have to face this in any way. I am thankful, that I am stronger and wiser now than I was, and I am happier to move on from the cowards that bullied me, and the friends that didn't stick around because I don't think I would of known how to be a good friend then any way.


I just hope anyone who is going through it believes what I wrote in bold - I know when you're feeling low that if anyone says "it will get better", you're not usually inclined to believe them!

Glad to hear you have managed to overcome it - and yeah, it certainly shows you who your true friends are, and who isn't worth bothering with!

x
The "thuggish" boys took my allowance plus plus for months and they physically hurt me, such as punching and kicking me down on the basketball court. It ended when they spat on me and left - because the teachers saw it. Ah, this happened during my primary years.
In junior high I wasn't what the students considered "a pretty girl" so people deliberately left me out of their conversations or group projects. The only three people who stood by my side was my childhood friend, a new exchange student and a family friend's son. Apparently I was diagnosed with (very) mild depression and high stress levels. It continued till I graduated from the IB, although the alienation slightly decreased.

Its all fine now though. I have friends who I can trust, a great boyfriend (even if we have our ups and downs) and I know how to take care of myself. I've also learnt how to communicate better with my parents - I've had serious trust issues with my parents but I'll probably derail the topic so I'll end it here for now.
(edited 10 years ago)
*****DISCLAIMER: although none of this is in any way okay and no one ever deserves to be treated like this, it's basically just normal stuff that every kid goes through, and nothing like the stuff in some of my dad's stories. It has not affected me negatively in the long term and I ended up going to a grammar school where there has not been a single incident of bullying that I know of. But, again, the fact that this is happening everywhere is NOT OKAY.*****

This went on for 3 years so I'm probably not going to talk about all of it - I'm sure there's a character limit! XD

The worst lesson I ever had was when these two guys:
(a) threw my open pencil case across the room and lost most of my stuff under the machinery (it was in DT)
(b) stole my scissors and started cutting the back of my neck
(c) tried to chop off my ponytail - they got some of it but thankfully the teacher stopped them
(d) stole the teachers's electric drill (like, for drilling in walls) and drilled my arm with it right on top of where I burnt it a few days earlier

Bonus: the teacher saw everything and all he did was say, "That's not very nice, please say sorry" which was probably just as bad.

Other Things:
*cut my hair
*put gum in my hair (buried deep and right at the top, so I lost a substantial chunk)
*hit me over the head with bags
*took pictures of me changing and sent them around then told the teacher I was a paedophile (what?????)
*tried to shove me down the stairs
*shoved me against lockers
*pulled my skirt down on the bus
*put red grapes down my shirt and squashed them
*threw apple cores at me/put them in my shirt
*pulled out whole chunks of my hair claiming it was a wig and asking how I stuck it down etc.
*made up rumours about me being a lesbian (I feel like this has happened to most girls, it's just so original)
*stole my calculator and threw it around the bus (that one actually makes me laugh)
*the usual Facebook bullying that happens to almost everyone ("Go run into an ugly tree dog" was a particularly funny comment)
*spit on me daily on the way to school (plus once on a weekend on my birthday)
*cycled their bikes into me at high speeds (oh, the tyre burns and grease)
*pushed my into traffic
*threw a milkshake at me
*this *****y girl broke her nail in PE and told everyone I attacked her (again, what?????????)
*a TEACHER made fun of me for being a "foreign student" by introducing me as that (I am Polish, in case you were wondering), putting on an accent and making up names for me in front of my entire year group (~250 people), then made me go up on stage and made fun of me for looking upset
*told important visitors to the school really vulgar (and obviously untrue) things about me that I still refuse to repeat to anyone
*dragged me down the stairs by my hair
*got injured and told a teacher that I did it to them to get me in trouble

Some of these aren't that interesting and are actually fairly common (what a sad education system we have). I said I wouldn't but I listed everything I could think of off the top of my head.

Sorry for the long post! I really enjoy talking about this. It seems so, so stupid all these years later. And it makes me really appreciate where I went to school after that - a wonderful safe haven in comparison.
delete
Original post by Black Hand Path
delete


....your account @Paracosm
Original post by Nirvana1989-1994
....your account @Paracosm


sorry, what do you mean?
Original post by Black Hand Path
sorry, what do you mean?


:colonhash:
The worst was when some guy swung his heavy bag up into my face and my vision in my right eye went totally black. I thought he had permanently blinded me. Had to go to the hospital and have various tests done but thankfully my vision returned after a little while. But god I was terrified.

Second worse was when one guy punched me in the stomach and when I fell he and his friends were kicking me, then they all spat on me, called me "a ****ing freak" then threw my bag in the bin as they walked away. The feeling of being spat on is so much worse than the punch or kicking. :frown:
I was beaten Up when I was really young by loads of The neighbours lol. Constantly about my weight that I rarely waited to leave The house. One of The worst comments came from a young lad whose now a pro footballeur. Then most recently at The age of 22 a 29 year old man And his 25 year old brother were So nasty to me In a constantly basis It was'nt even funny. People can just go way to far.
Pointed out the fact that I was disabled.

Spoiler

I was bullied in secondary school. Think it started from the end of year 7/beginning of year 8.

Some of the 'popular' people were just horrible to me, called me names, made comments about me, etc. Obviously I tried to stick up for myself but never woarmed :frown: I regret not telling a teacher or one of my parents :frown:!

Also, when I was in year 9, I had someone accuse me of being racist to them. We were having a go at each other about something, and he turns round and goes 'oh go and have a bath' (just to let everyone know, I do shower daily) and then I turned round and was like 'I do have a bath everyday' and at this point he stood up and glared at me and said something (can't remember what) because he didn't hear me/didn't listen properly and accused me of racism, and I've never been racist in my life, I remember bursting into tears after the lesson when the teacher kept me behind to ask what had happened because I know I'd never say something like that, but luckily one of my friends sat nearby and heard what I'd said. I then remember quite a while later in another class that someone else basically twisted what I said and made out I said something racist from that incident, the teacher then told him to stop it.

Also I can be shy, I think I was even more shy back in school, which might of been a cause for people starting on me :dontknow:! Also, I was friends with a girl from primary school, we were good friends up until around the start of year 8, and she started hanging out with the people who were just horrible to me, and for some reason (up until this day) I think she made up stuff about me or whatever which made them bully me more :/!

Also, when I was in year 10 (it was towards the end of year 10), I got into a fight with another student, I got provoked. I remember for a while some people were just horrible towards me about it. And when I was in year 11, I walked back into form at the end of the day. I had gone into the toilets as I had to rub something off my face. Anyway when I was walking into form, I remember someone saying 'oh you got into another fight?' I was like no, then they started going on about how they would've liked to have seen the fight from year 10, and how they would've filmed it and cheered the other girl on (or something like that). I just ignored him as I didn't feel like getting into an argument with him. He was loud enough for the my form tutor to hear, but what got me was my form tutor didn't say anything to him, so looking back I wish I'd have said something to him.

But there were other popular people who were genuinely nice to me though :redface:! Just wish I stood up for myself more back in school, or told a teacher or someone..
A couple of girls during roughly yrs 7-9ish constantly made fun of me because back then I had severe acne. I didn't have anything in me to stand up to them so I just took it but luckily I had friends that stood up for me. Not trying to be mean but several of my Chinese relatives would also make snarky comments every time they saw me. I used to cry in secret so much. I ended up going on roaccutane just over 1.5 years ago to treat it.

It's a working progress to regain my self confidence but I'm working on it and it's been getting better over time.
Forgiving them was one of the biggest steps for me to being happy again and it felt like a big weight had been lifted off of me. I knew I had to learn to let go of the resent I felt towards them if I wanted to move on and stop being that girl that was scared to even go outside without makeup on. I'm currently in yr 13, have amazing friends and I'm feeling much better now. I'm also more open about my acne story now. Having been through it I know it's always reassuring to know that you're not alone in dealing with this condition even if sometimes it might feel like it
(edited 7 years ago)

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