Using a dating app to find first boyfriend?

Yes, I do get what you're saying, I'm just saying what I do. I'm picky, I'm not going to pick anything for the fact of saying "I've got a bloke". I've had plenty of dates from online www, just none of them progress any further as the majority want casual sex which I am NOT into, & deserve a whole lot better than that. I've messaged several men, none have responded which is fine, no biggy. However I have had men messaging me -equal split. But I will not lower what I am looking for for satisfaction of others. If I'm not interested in a short man, I'm not interested. Simple. Yes I probably am limiting myself but I'd rather be picky and selective, than being know as the girl that picks anything!

I've heard and witnessed a lot of success stories from online dating, so I wouldn't say it's a waste of time for those seeking a serious relationship. As long as you are safe and aware of your boundaries, needs and wants it should be treated as an exciting discovery phase. Dating is typically a learning experience - the more dates you encounter, the more aware you become of men's dating behaviour and what you should and shouldn't find acceptable. So I advise to not give up, keep dating! Eventually, (by the law of large numbers) you should be successful in finding a compatible partner.



DancinBallerina, I do think that being picky is the main reason why you may have not been so successful in the past. Women who produce a list of things (mostly superficial things) and measure every guy against that list, find that it is exceptionally rare to find a guy who matches everything you want. Of course you don't want to be the girl who "just picks anything", but what about being the girl "who is perpetually single"?

I mean think about it...I understand you have a preference for taller men, but you should also realise from that ONE criteria alone, you have already eliminated about 84% of the adult male population in the UK (due to your abnormally taller height) I calculate this figure by simply eliminating the adult male population who is 1 standard deviation above the mean from a standard normal distribution (which in this case is 5ft 9in). Of course 16% is still a relatively high figure, but when you narrow your search even further through other physical preferences (this is even before we even consider emotional chemistry) you'll find you have severely minimised your "success rate" of finding a compatible partner.

What I'm trying to say is, by all means don't settle for any guy - there has to be an amount of compatibility for a relationship to work, but don't be so highly selective and hard on men. Instead of judging a man on superficial criteria, produce a list which engages towards a mans character, intelligence and sense of morality.

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This is not necessarily true. If an average height woman (5ft 3in according to the ONS) wants a taller guy, then it makes very little difference to their selection of men, as the majority of men (even those deemed statistically "short") would more than likely be taller. If however the woman herself is well above average height or just demands an exceptionally tall man (6ft or above) that's a requirement that will eliminate a large proportion of men from their dating selection. My point was that if you eliminate 84% of the adult male population based on height and then further want to narrow things down to things such as age, location etc - this is before you even consider more important factors such as their sense of character, whether they are single, their sexuality, their relationship preferences, their sense of morals etc I think there is a high risk of not finding a compatible partner. I'm not here to judge anyone, everyone is superficial to some degree anyway. I only wished to point out those facts.