I'm a girl. I like girls. I'm a "Muslim" and Asian. What to do?

*cue muslims saying "astaghfirullah"*

Yep, you read the title right.

I like girls. I like their hair. I like the way they smell. I like that they're soft. I like that I can connect with a girl far more intensely and quicker than I do with a male.

I've always liked girls. It's always been like that. When I was a child, I'd never see the hype with boys when my female friends would be getting boyfriends. Even through my teenage years, I'd never have crushes on boys - on girls though, YESSSSssSss.

Right, enough about girls. Let's move onto me, as a person.

I am a female adult who was born and raised in an Asian AND Muslim household. Both identities are notorious to shun out anyone part of the LGBT community.
I'm not a practicing Muslim. I don't believe in a God. Yet I don't drink nor eat pork. I even eat Halal food. Maybe there's a part of me that's super scared that there is a God. Anyways that's another forum topic.

I don't believe in a God because why would he/she make me the way I am? Why would he bring me into a world where people will reject me and think I'm disgusting for merely just loving another human being?

And for those who think "you chose to like girls". Um, no. I didn't wake up one day and think "Hmmmmm YESSSS I'm going to go against my religion and my ethnic background and fancy girls. Just for the #baNTZ!!!". Oh no no no. I didn't chose to be like this.

I;ve never been in a relationship with a girl, not been with one sexually. I lust after both these things. But I have a feeling that I'll never be able to do so. Even if an opportunity came, I would feel guilty.

Being from an Asian background and Muslim background, marriage is a big deal. I'm in my 20s. I'm finishing up my studies. This is the prime time for girls and boys of my background(s) to get married. Marriage is such an important thing in Islam and in all South Asian communities.

So marriage is traditionally between a man and woman (god said adam and eve not adam and steve, am i right ?!?!), and guess what, I don't like men in that way. I've tried to invest myself with a man. I can't connect with a man on an emotional level. The though of their genitals does not make me aroused. How on earth can I get married to one? If I don't get married, I'm a failure. If I come out, I will be shunned by my family and the Asian and Islamic community.

Sooooo, I'm pretty much f*cked. Let's be real, I'm not coming out any time soon to my family or friends.

I don't know what to do. I don't want to get married. I don't want to ask "God" for forgiveness. I simply do not believe in him/her.

If you're a Muslim and reading this, do not pray for me. Don't make dua for me. There's nothing wrong with me.

*cue muslims saying "astaghfirullah"*

Yep, you read the title right.

I like girls. I like their hair. I like the way they smell. I like that they're soft. I like that I can connect with a girl far more intensely and quicker than I do with a male.

I've always liked girls. It's always been like that. When I was a child, I'd never see the hype with boys when my female friends would be getting boyfriends. Even through my teenage years, I'd never have crushes on boys - on girls though, YESSSSssSss.

Right, enough about girls. Let's move onto me, as a person.

I am a female adult who was born and raised in an Asian AND Muslim household. Both identities are notorious to shun out anyone part of the LGBT community.
I'm not a practicing Muslim. I don't believe in a God. Yet I don't drink nor eat pork. I even eat Halal food. Maybe there's a part of me that's super scared that there is a God. Anyways that's another forum topic.

I don't believe in a God because why would he/she make me the way I am? Why would he bring me into a world where people will reject me and think I'm disgusting for merely just loving another human being?

And for those who think "you chose to like girls". Um, no. I didn't wake up one day and think "Hmmmmm YESSSS I'm going to go against my religion and my ethnic background and fancy girls. Just for the #baNTZ!!!". Oh no no no. I didn't chose to be like this.

I;ve never been in a relationship with a girl, not been with one sexually. I lust after both these things. But I have a feeling that I'll never be able to do so. Even if an opportunity came, I would feel guilty.

Being from an Asian background and Muslim background, marriage is a big deal. I'm in my 20s. I'm finishing up my studies. This is the prime time for girls and boys of my background(s) to get married. Marriage is such an important thing in Islam and in all South Asian communities.

So marriage is traditionally between a man and woman (god said adam and eve not adam and steve, am i right ?!?!), and guess what, I don't like men in that way. I've tried to invest myself with a man. I can't connect with a man on an emotional level. The though of their genitals does not make me aroused. How on earth can I get married to one? If I don't get married, I'm a failure. If I come out, I will be shunned by my family and the Asian and Islamic community.

Sooooo, I'm pretty much f*cked. Let's be real, I'm not coming out any time soon to my family or friends.

I don't know what to do. I don't want to get married. I don't want to ask "God" for forgiveness. I simply do not believe in him/her.

If you're a Muslim and reading this, do not pray for me. Don't make dua for me. There's nothing wrong with me.

*cue muslims saying "astaghfirullah"*

Yep, you read the title right.

I like girls. I like their hair. I like the way they smell. I like that they're soft. I like that I can connect with a girl far more intensely and quicker than I do with a male.

I've always liked girls. It's always been like that. When I was a child, I'd never see the hype with boys when my female friends would be getting boyfriends. Even through my teenage years, I'd never have crushes on boys - on girls though, YESSSSssSss.

Right, enough about girls. Let's move onto me, as a person.

I am a female adult who was born and raised in an Asian AND Muslim household. Both identities are notorious to shun out anyone part of the LGBT community.
I'm not a practicing Muslim. I don't believe in a God. Yet I don't drink nor eat pork. I even eat Halal food. Maybe there's a part of me that's super scared that there is a God. Anyways that's another forum topic.

I don't believe in a God because why would he/she make me the way I am? Why would he bring me into a world where people will reject me and think I'm disgusting for merely just loving another human being?

And for those who think "you chose to like girls". Um, no. I didn't wake up one day and think "Hmmmmm YESSSS I'm going to go against my religion and my ethnic background and fancy girls. Just for the #baNTZ!!!". Oh no no no. I didn't chose to be like this.

I;ve never been in a relationship with a girl, not been with one sexually. I lust after both these things. But I have a feeling that I'll never be able to do so. Even if an opportunity came, I would feel guilty.

Being from an Asian background and Muslim background, marriage is a big deal. I'm in my 20s. I'm finishing up my studies. This is the prime time for girls and boys of my background(s) to get married. Marriage is such an important thing in Islam and in all South Asian communities.

So marriage is traditionally between a man and woman (god said adam and eve not adam and steve, am i right ?!?!), and guess what, I don't like men in that way. I've tried to invest myself with a man. I can't connect with a man on an emotional level. The though of their genitals does not make me aroused. How on earth can I get married to one? If I don't get married, I'm a failure. If I come out, I will be shunned by my family and the Asian and Islamic community.

Sooooo, I'm pretty much f*cked. Let's be real, I'm not coming out any time soon to my family or friends.

I don't know what to do. I don't want to get married. I don't want to ask "God" for forgiveness. I simply do not believe in him/her.

If you're a Muslim and reading this, do not pray for me. Don't make dua for me. There's nothing wrong with me.

You have no other choice but to just live your life how you're supposed to live it aka find a girl and live happily ever after. If your parents or friends cannot accept this then obviously they will sadly be no longer a part of your life anymore but there's nothing you can do about it. You will find new friends and you can have your OWN family

Hey

I'm a Muslim Asian female too but I'm not going to criticise you. Just be the way you are. I'm afraid I don't know how I can help you but I really hope and pray that you get be who you really are. That must be such a phase for you rn. I'm sorry .

Good for you. Be who you want to be. You might not be able to have a relationship with a girl now if you're living me at home with a Muslim family, but you could wait until you have a job and are financially independent before doing so. Then there wouldn't be the risk of being kicked out and/or disowned.

There is no way that someone's religion should ever stop them being the person they are. Take me as an example. I am a catholic lesbian and many times I have had people ask me "how can you be gay and so religious at the same time?". Sexuality is innate and out of a person's control. RELIGION HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH SEXUALITY.

I also have a friend who is a Muslim and likes girls. She fell in love with me but for her sake I declined. She and I are both coping with our situations by just not coming out to our siblings and parents. There is no need to.
My dad is one of those who believe that you can "pray the gay away" and my mum thinks that "God hates homosexuals". When I had a girlfriend I kept it secret. I suppose that's the beauty of homosexual relationships; when you're around other people you can just pretend to be only friends.
I take great pride in both my faith and sexuality as God created me as a lesbian, and I don't give a damn what others say as I can never change.

About the marriage thing; it is illegal I think to force a marriage anyway. As for the shunning; there's not much you can do unless you're lucky and your parents don't mind you remaining unmarried.

Just ride it out. As I have grown up and become more experienced with relationships and gay problems I have learned how to make it an enjoyable part of who I am. Stay confident. And stay gay. 😉🌈

Do what you think is right. At the end of the day, it's between you and God. And you don't have to get married, your parent can't force you islamically.

My ex - friend isnlike this.

Seriously OP you need to leave your communinty /religious relatives if they dont accept you for who they are and start a fresh.

well I mean ... there's nothing in the Qur'an about lesbianism
read this : http://www.answering-islam.org/Responses/Osama/lesbian.htm

you can be Muslim and a lesbian gurl you don't have to do anything