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Would you date someone in the Army?

Hi all,

I'm 21 and have been a member of the army for a few years. Currently on a solid wage with very little out goings so financially pressure free. Since joining however, my social life has taken a hit due to the pressures of work and I now struggle to find the time to meet new people apart from my original group of friends.

While I've always received quite a positive reaction from older women, girls my own age seem to have a less than enthusiastic reaction when they learn of my job. What is the general view of the Army among women around my age?
Would you recommend dating sites etc as a good way to meet new people?
I'm 21 and feel sometimes I live the life of a priest!

Thank you, any advice is appreciated.

Reply 1

CleverSquirrel

21

Hey!
I know a few people who have dated/ are dating people in the army, and they are really happy!
you could try dating sites- not a bad idea, just be careful as some people just use for casual hook-ups ect!

How are you in terms of confidence ect when it comes to talking to girls?

tbh, you're job shouldn't matter, they should like you for who you are! not your job!

try going out to a bar or some-where along the lines of that with your original group you speak of? (not clubs though-it's hard to find someone to talk to and having conversations in clubs is just a pain because of the music haha)

Reply 2

Caraphernelia

12

hello,

My boyfriend of 5 months is currently in the army. We are both of a similar age to you (him 21 me 20) so I would say it is possible to find someone. Most of my female friends find guys in the military attractive so there are girls out there for you.

I met my boyfriend at a mutual friends christmas party when he was on leave so not sure if you go home at leave at all but maybe through socializing with friends in an environment where there are going to be girls (e.g. parties/BBQ's) you might meet someone. Again not sure if you go home at the weekends or stay on camp but there may be opportunities to meet girls through friends at home (worth a try!). Do any of your friends have any mutual female friends they could perhaps invite to a party or something?

Think the best way for you to meet someone is just by socializing and putting yourself out there, it may take a while but it will be worth it when you find a nice girl.

Dating sites like POF might work (you can state that you are looking for a relationship and not a hook up) but I'd probably stay away from the ones such as tinder due to the reason most people use it for.

Good luck!

Reply 3

doodle_333

19

personally I wouldn't, just because I would struggle with the long period of time being long distance and the constant worry but I'm sure plenty of people would still be interested, I would have a lot of respect for someone who committed to joining the armed forces

Reply 4

Juichiro

18

Original post by Anonymous

Hi all,

I'm 21 and have been a member of the army for a few years. Currently on a solid wage with very little out goings so financially pressure free. Since joining however, my social life has taken a hit due to the pressures of work and I now struggle to find the time to meet new people apart from my original group of friends.

While I've always received quite a positive reaction from older women, girls my own age seem to have a less than enthusiastic reaction when they learn of my job. What is the general view of the Army among women around my age?
Would you recommend dating sites etc as a good way to meet new people?
I'm 21 and feel sometimes I live the life of a priest!

Thank you, any advice is appreciated.

Well, I am guessing they imagine that you are more likely to die than the average potential mate. Or that you might be more likely to be away from long periods of time. Or that you might be emotionless (aka fit the stereotype of a soldier). Or that you might engage in warfare campaigns (aka shooting people or stuff like that). Your best bet is to ask when you see that reaction.

Reply 5

XMaramena

22

I don't know many people in the army. My cousin was practically a best friend to me. Then I didn't see or hear from him for a while when he went through training then was away doing something I'm not sure. Next time I saw him, he was practically lifeless. Didn't really say anything, just answered yes or no questions then sat upright in a chair the whole time dead silent. Didn't even make eye contact with anyone. As if someone had taken his entirely personality and just sucked it out, and left a basic functioning human body behind. It was creepy. That was 5 years ago, he's been that way ever since. The guy in the local gun shop's the same. He served in with the royal artillery for 15 years, it's impossible to have a conversation with him. I'm surprised he ever sells anything to be honest.

I'm sure not everyone in the army ends up like that, but I think there's definitely a part of the training that destroys a little part of you, so I suspect dating someone in the army might be very frustrating.

Reply 6

Findlay6

19

Personally, no.
1) I don't agree with the Army (war/fighting/killing to resolve issues) which would obviously be an issue between our opinions/values.
2) I like spending time with my partners - physical time, all through the year. I couldn't deal with 6 month long-distance.
3) PTSD/Other mental issues you can develop due to the job - It's not nice to witness and it's self-inflicted.

Reply 7

LucyJoC

Original post by Anonymous

Hi all,

I'm 21 and have been a member of the army for a few years. Currently on a solid wage with very little out goings so financially pressure free. Since joining however, my social life has taken a hit due to the pressures of work and I now struggle to find the time to meet new people apart from my original group of friends.

While I've always received quite a positive reaction from older women, girls my own age seem to have a less than enthusiastic reaction when they learn of my job. What is the general view of the Army among women around my age?
Would you recommend dating sites etc as a good way to meet new people?
I'm 21 and feel sometimes I live the life of a priest!

Thank you, any advice is appreciated.

Hello! I currently have a boyfriend in the RAF who is training and so fortunately the base is near home and so he visits every weekend. However at the end of August he will graduate and be placed to a different base and I won't seem him as much because of it being so far away. We are taking it in our stride and seeing how things will go. I've known him for 4 years and we've been really close for about 2 years and started dating only a few months ago. I love him to pieces and so will do my best to make things work and he has also promised the same.
With your situation, I believe that there are women out there that will be okay with someone who is in the army and away for long periods of time. It's just finding that girl in the first place that is the tricky part. I think dating sites would be a great start and mention what you're looking for. There will be some girls that will be up for it! don't lose hope and I wish you all the best :smile:

Reply 8

MrsSheldonCooper

20

Yeah probably.

We could have shooting lessons together :ahee:

Reply 9

Juichiro

18

Original post by MrsSheldonCooper

Yeah probably.

We could have shooting lessons together :ahee:

Totally irrelevant but your profile picture makes me think of a vampire. :tongue:

Reply 10

EmmaB7695

1

No I am around the same age as you your not the problem they are they ask you to tell them and don't like the answer well it's a war what were they expecting you to say and no datingsites they will take all your money if its any concelation I would date you in a heartbeat.

Would you date someone in the Army?

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