Opinion: Do you make your life friends at Univeristy or at School
So as the title says opinion on friends that you make at High School/College vs the ones you make at University.
My opinion stands, as a 1st year going into my 2nd year, that the friends I have made at University are leagues more aligned with me and they click with me better. This could be because we practically live together for so many weeks a year and then subsequently plan holidays together.
I feel like the University community as a whole is much better for longer term friendships. I always thought that the 'friends' you make at high school or college are just your 'classmates' i.e you befriend them because you need somebody to talk to at school. Granted I had some close friends from high school and college whom I still speak to on occasion, but even now, I still speak to my University friends more often.
My teachers in high school and college always used to say that you make your life friends at University.
I'd be interested in anybody who has left University and can give their own account.
My opinion stands, as a 1st year going into my 2nd year, that the friends I have made at University are leagues more aligned with me and they click with me better. This could be because we practically live together for so many weeks a year and then subsequently plan holidays together.
I feel like the University community as a whole is much better for longer term friendships. I always thought that the 'friends' you make at high school or college are just your 'classmates' i.e you befriend them because you need somebody to talk to at school. Granted I had some close friends from high school and college whom I still speak to on occasion, but even now, I still speak to my University friends more often.
My teachers in high school and college always used to say that you make your life friends at University.
I'd be interested in anybody who has left University and can give their own account.
I'm only going to uni in septemeber but I can already now say that in my case and in case of many of the people I know, friendships practically die during college. I my self had a lot of friends in school, a few of them I still had as friends in college since not all went to the same college as me. But most of these friends during my 3 college, slowly began becoming people I just know. At this point, college finished and all ready for uni, i don't have friends and I'm okay with that tbh. I do think it is due to the "only class mates" or "people to hang out at breaks" sort of friendship.
I think the reason some people may say that you start to make actual friends at uni is because after all, you go into such education at a much mature age (usually 18,19) and leave in your 20s. After so many years of education and meeting so many people, I think that at uni you pick your friends much more carefully than you did at school/college. You're then at an age where you spend more time with people outside of education so you're not seeing them as just "classmates" anymore but actual fiends you will see outside of uni, hang out in free time etc. You pick people who you know are going to be worth your time and not going to fade away really
I think the reason some people may say that you start to make actual friends at uni is because after all, you go into such education at a much mature age (usually 18,19) and leave in your 20s. After so many years of education and meeting so many people, I think that at uni you pick your friends much more carefully than you did at school/college. You're then at an age where you spend more time with people outside of education so you're not seeing them as just "classmates" anymore but actual fiends you will see outside of uni, hang out in free time etc. You pick people who you know are going to be worth your time and not going to fade away really
Original post by katherine9609
I'm only going to uni in septemeber but I can already now say that in my case and in case of many of the people I know, friendships practically die during college. I my self had a lot of friends in school, a few of them I still had as friends in college since not all went to the same college as me. But most of these friends during my 3 college, slowly began becoming people I just know. At this point, college finished and all ready for uni, i don't have friends and I'm okay with that tbh. I do think it is due to the "only class mates" or "people to hang out at breaks" sort of friendship.
I think the reason some people may say that you start to make actual friends at uni is because after all, you go into such education at a much mature age (usually 18,19) and leave in your 20s. After so many years of education and meeting so many people, I think that at uni you pick your friends much more carefully than you did at school/college. You're then at an age where you spend more time with people outside of education so you're not seeing them as just "classmates" anymore but actual fiends you will see outside of uni, hang out in free time etc. You pick people who you know are going to be worth your time and not going to fade away really
I think the reason some people may say that you start to make actual friends at uni is because after all, you go into such education at a much mature age (usually 18,19) and leave in your 20s. After so many years of education and meeting so many people, I think that at uni you pick your friends much more carefully than you did at school/college. You're then at an age where you spend more time with people outside of education so you're not seeing them as just "classmates" anymore but actual fiends you will see outside of uni, hang out in free time etc. You pick people who you know are going to be worth your time and not going to fade away really
I agree. People at school are just people you know, like you know their face, you know a little bit about them superficially.
I think it's also to do with the fact that people disperse into different universities. Say you had a friendship group, all of them will most likely end up at different universities, some may end up staying with others, but in the majority that's what happens. You, yourself, will find your new friends at University and they themselves will do the same, so you just push each other away for the new friendships you make at University and since you're at a much mature age, you tend to open up to them more and they become real true friends and so the friends you once were 'close' with at college, become just your regular friends you see on facebook once and a while. Especially if your core friendship group doesn't leave near each other, there's no chance for a regroup when you all come back.
I'm quite fortunate in that I had a small close knit group of friends at College and so I've kept good contact with those.
It's interesting to see people's view on this, however
Original post by Protoxylic
So as the title says opinion on friends that you make at High School/College vs the ones you make at University.
My opinion stands, as a 1st year going into my 2nd year, that the friends I have made at University are leagues more aligned with me and they click with me better. This could be because we practically live together for so many weeks a year and then subsequently plan holidays together.
I feel like the University community as a whole is much better for longer term friendships. I always thought that the 'friends' you make at high school or college are just your 'classmates' i.e you befriend them because you need somebody to talk to at school. Granted I had some close friends from high school and college whom I still speak to on occasion, but even now, I still speak to my University friends more often.
My teachers in high school and college always used to say that you make your life friends at University.
I'd be interested in anybody who has left University and can give their own account.
My opinion stands, as a 1st year going into my 2nd year, that the friends I have made at University are leagues more aligned with me and they click with me better. This could be because we practically live together for so many weeks a year and then subsequently plan holidays together.
I feel like the University community as a whole is much better for longer term friendships. I always thought that the 'friends' you make at high school or college are just your 'classmates' i.e you befriend them because you need somebody to talk to at school. Granted I had some close friends from high school and college whom I still speak to on occasion, but even now, I still speak to my University friends more often.
My teachers in high school and college always used to say that you make your life friends at University.
I'd be interested in anybody who has left University and can give their own account.
I met my partner at uni,however my closest friends i met at school so it's down to the individual i think.
Original post by claireestelle
I met my partner at uni,however my closest friends i met at school so it's down to the individual i think.
Of course
I start university in September and i think school is more people you are friends with just for convenience as its easier to just be friends then be awkward in lessons, break, lunch etc..
I think at university you will probably develop a closer bond as you live with those people and the friends outside your flat are usually people like course friends so you may have the same career in mind or friends you make at societies so you share common interest.
Maybe im wrong but at school i think you just take people at face value and you have a laugh and stuff but i dont think it builds a "lifelong" friendship whereas at university you are more mature and the people you are friends with you choose to be friends with as there are thousands of people in university whereas in my year group there is about 130 of us so we cant really "avoid" people even if we try because the awkward is REAL.
I think at university you will probably develop a closer bond as you live with those people and the friends outside your flat are usually people like course friends so you may have the same career in mind or friends you make at societies so you share common interest.
Maybe im wrong but at school i think you just take people at face value and you have a laugh and stuff but i dont think it builds a "lifelong" friendship whereas at university you are more mature and the people you are friends with you choose to be friends with as there are thousands of people in university whereas in my year group there is about 130 of us so we cant really "avoid" people even if we try because the awkward is REAL.
Original post by Protoxylic
So as the title says opinion on friends that you make at High School/College vs the ones you make at University.
My opinion stands, as a 1st year going into my 2nd year, that the friends I have made at University are leagues more aligned with me and they click with me better. This could be because we practically live together for so many weeks a year and then subsequently plan holidays together.
I feel like the University community as a whole is much better for longer term friendships. I always thought that the 'friends' you make at high school or college are just your 'classmates' i.e you befriend them because you need somebody to talk to at school. Granted I had some close friends from high school and college whom I still speak to on occasion, but even now, I still speak to my University friends more often.
My teachers in high school and college always used to say that you make your life friends at University.
I'd be interested in anybody who has left University and can give their own account.
My opinion stands, as a 1st year going into my 2nd year, that the friends I have made at University are leagues more aligned with me and they click with me better. This could be because we practically live together for so many weeks a year and then subsequently plan holidays together.
I feel like the University community as a whole is much better for longer term friendships. I always thought that the 'friends' you make at high school or college are just your 'classmates' i.e you befriend them because you need somebody to talk to at school. Granted I had some close friends from high school and college whom I still speak to on occasion, but even now, I still speak to my University friends more often.
My teachers in high school and college always used to say that you make your life friends at University.
I'd be interested in anybody who has left University and can give their own account.
From what I've experienced, I had a lot of friends in secondry school, but I've only managed to stay close to about 3 of them. In college, I had a group of 9 closer friends, that went up to about 20 or so, and now as the year has come to an end, I've maybe stuck with about 5.
When people move away, you have different interests, and you spend less time together, unless you're really really close, you gradually just fall apart from eachother. Happens with any kind of mate.
People talk to you just because you're there.
Original post by TSRFT8
I start university in September and i think school is more people you are friends with just for convenience as its easier to just be friends then be awkward in lessons, break, lunch etc..
I think at university you will probably develop a closer bond as you live with those people and the friends outside your flat are usually people like course friends so you may have the same career in mind or friends you make at societies so you share common interest.
Maybe im wrong but at school i think you just take people at face value and you have a laugh and stuff but i dont think it builds a "lifelong" friendship whereas at university you are more mature and the people you are friends with you choose to be friends with as there are thousands of people in university whereas in my year group there is about 130 of us so we cant really "avoid" people even if we try because the awkward is REAL.
I think at university you will probably develop a closer bond as you live with those people and the friends outside your flat are usually people like course friends so you may have the same career in mind or friends you make at societies so you share common interest.
Maybe im wrong but at school i think you just take people at face value and you have a laugh and stuff but i dont think it builds a "lifelong" friendship whereas at university you are more mature and the people you are friends with you choose to be friends with as there are thousands of people in university whereas in my year group there is about 130 of us so we cant really "avoid" people even if we try because the awkward is REAL.
Yeah I agree, you can build memories and somewhat good friendships, but in my opinion none of them are are strong as the friends you meet at university. You make friends at university because you go out of your way to make them, whereas at school you just end up talking to them and then eventually calling them your friend. I can definitely see building lifelong friendships with the friends I have made so far at university and it's only been a year, yet I know so much more about them than any other classmate I have talked to (bar extremely close friends that I have known for about 16 years). You can just chat with them at night, social gatherings loads of things.
Original post by omfgalib
From what I've experienced, I had a lot of friends in secondry school, but I've only managed to stay close to about 3 of them. In college, I had a group of 9 closer friends, that went up to about 20 or so, and now as the year has come to an end, I've maybe stuck with about 5.
When people move away, you have different interests, and you spend less time together, unless you're really really close, you gradually just fall apart from eachother. Happens with any kind of mate.
People talk to you just because you're there.
When people move away, you have different interests, and you spend less time together, unless you're really really close, you gradually just fall apart from eachother. Happens with any kind of mate.
People talk to you just because you're there.
Yeah same with you. Social groups that you were in at college of high school tend to fall apart once you get to university unless you're really tight, but loads of people come with an open mind to make friends.
Original post by Protoxylic
Yeah I agree, you can build memories and somewhat good friendships, but in my opinion none of them are are strong as the friends you meet at university. You make friends at university because you go out of your way to make them, whereas at school you just end up talking to them and then eventually calling them your friend. I can definitely see building lifelong friendships with the friends I have made so far at university and it's only been a year, yet I know so much more about them than any other classmate I have talked to (bar extremely close friends that I have known for about 16 years). You can just chat with them at night, social gatherings loads of things.
I think i speak to alot of people in school because if you dont there is this awkwardness as you are in a compact space for 6-7 hours of the day 5 days a week. When we started year 13 in September everyone was best of friends as the year went on and closer towards exams everyone started distancing themselves from each other as we knew we would not need to be friends once exams finish and i think this happens at all schools. At university no one is OBLIGED to have to be friends with anyone albeit unless you are in a flat and then it would be awkward if you did not like anyone but aside from that you can pick and choose whereas in school you are given say 100 class mates and have no real choice.
I met most of my best friends right after uni, though I still have some friends from school I see occasionally. There's only one or two people from uni I'm still close wih (graduated 3 years ago).
I think it's different for everyone though.
I think it's different for everyone though.
Original post by TSRFT8
I think i speak to alot of people in school because if you dont there is this awkwardness as you are in a compact space for 6-7 hours of the day 5 days a week. When we started year 13 in September everyone was best of friends as the year went on and closer towards exams everyone started distancing themselves from each other as we knew we would not need to be friends once exams finish and i think this happens at all schools. At university no one is OBLIGED to have to be friends with anyone albeit unless you are in a flat and then it would be awkward if you did not like anyone but aside from that you can pick and choose whereas in school you are given say 100 class mates and have no real choice.
Yeah I see that
Original post by ForgettingWhatsername
I met most of my best friends right after uni, though I still have some friends from school I see occasionally. There's only one or two people from uni I'm still close wih (graduated 3 years ago).
I think it's different for everyone though.
I think it's different for everyone though.
Of course, it's interesting to see everybody's view
In all honestly I don't think either are particularly important, I'd like to think that you make more friends in areas where you live once you get your first job
Probs lifelong friends are made at school. You will lose touch with both sets but probably more likely to run into school Mates in your local pub if you return home to visit or live near for example. People change, life goes on
Original post by Protoxylic
So as the title says opinion on friends that you make at High School/College vs the ones you make at University.
My opinion stands, as a 1st year going into my 2nd year, that the friends I have made at University are leagues more aligned with me and they click with me better. This could be because we practically live together for so many weeks a year and then subsequently plan holidays together.
I feel like the University community as a whole is much better for longer term friendships. I always thought that the 'friends' you make at high school or college are just your 'classmates' i.e you befriend them because you need somebody to talk to at school. Granted I had some close friends from high school and college whom I still speak to on occasion, but even now, I still speak to my University friends more often.
My teachers in high school and college always used to say that you make your life friends at University.
I'd be interested in anybody who has left University and can give their own account.
My opinion stands, as a 1st year going into my 2nd year, that the friends I have made at University are leagues more aligned with me and they click with me better. This could be because we practically live together for so many weeks a year and then subsequently plan holidays together.
I feel like the University community as a whole is much better for longer term friendships. I always thought that the 'friends' you make at high school or college are just your 'classmates' i.e you befriend them because you need somebody to talk to at school. Granted I had some close friends from high school and college whom I still speak to on occasion, but even now, I still speak to my University friends more often.
My teachers in high school and college always used to say that you make your life friends at University.
I'd be interested in anybody who has left University and can give their own account.
Are you a mod? Why is ur name red
Original post by JoshC98
I'm starting university in September, and my closest friends are those I went to primary school with. I imagine they'll still be my closest friends once I've finished university as well
Yeah I agree. Primary school friends are actually quite different to High school friends, they're your first venture into social life and they stick with you forever. One of my close friends I have known since we were just 5, now we're both 19 and still kicking it
Original post by BrianMcEgg
In all honestly I don't think either are particularly important, I'd like to think that you make more friends in areas where you live once you get your first job
Nah, I'm not comparing their importance, I'm comparing people's opinions on who they think, based on where abouts there are now in education, they will get their life long friends, it may be both, it may be either one or the other. I have just heard the popular opinion with teachers and with others who are currently at University, that you tend to make the best long term friendships at University.
Original post by neal95
Probs lifelong friends are made at school. You will lose touch with both sets but probably more likely to run into school Mates in your local pub if you return home to visit or live near for example. People change, life goes on
That is true. School mates are sort of your 'home friends' if they live near you.
Original post by Teleport1
Are you a mod? Why is ur name red
I'm not a mod, nope
I'd say most of the time school friends as you'll always have the location connection whereas after university a lot of people won't revisit their university city particularly often and it's a lot more difficult to keep a friendship going as you have to organise trips rather than just posting "Hey I'm back home for a week" on facebook.
If you stay in your university area after you graduate then it will definitely be at your uni however as like you said the friendships made are more meaningful.
If you stay in your university area after you graduate then it will definitely be at your uni however as like you said the friendships made are more meaningful.
I think it's a bit of both. I have about 7-8 friends from school I still talk to, text and see for a coffee or go out clubbing. They're my rocks.
Having been to two unis: I have made at least 3 close friends that I speak to and see over the year. I see 2/3 because they live 20 mins away from me so it's easier to catch up than the 3rd. But I made SO MANY "friends" in my first uni that just have not even breathed a text to me when I left the uni. Says a lot really. But I have 3 close ones from that uni and that's all that matters.
The same as this uni - I think I've made about 3-4 close friendships in my new uni which is alright cause I have an extra 2 years to develop them. There is a ridiculous pressure in the air for first years to become best friends with people they have just met in Freshers and to maintain their friendship even if you don't like their particular social activities.
I'd rather have a few close friends than a lot of distant friends. Always remember this!!
Having been to two unis: I have made at least 3 close friends that I speak to and see over the year. I see 2/3 because they live 20 mins away from me so it's easier to catch up than the 3rd. But I made SO MANY "friends" in my first uni that just have not even breathed a text to me when I left the uni. Says a lot really. But I have 3 close ones from that uni and that's all that matters.
The same as this uni - I think I've made about 3-4 close friendships in my new uni which is alright cause I have an extra 2 years to develop them. There is a ridiculous pressure in the air for first years to become best friends with people they have just met in Freshers and to maintain their friendship even if you don't like their particular social activities.
I'd rather have a few close friends than a lot of distant friends. Always remember this!!
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