Should I lose my virginity to friends with benefits?
We’ve been friends for 1.5 years and talked romantically at first but realised we’re better as friends. After that realisation we drifted apart a bit but still spoke daily and have pretty much the entire time we’ve known each other. Recently we’ve become a lot closer and sometimes conversations go a little sExual. He’s expressed that he finds me very attractive and during a sExual talk said he’d be happy to lose his virginity to me but that it’s up to me as he knows i don’t like doing stuff outside of relationships.
I know no relationship would come out of it but I am thinking but of going for it because the first time is scary and ik he cares for me and will make me as comfortable as he can (sometimes i struggle w my mental heath and he’s happy to stay on the phone all night cheering me up). Everyone has to lose it and losing it in a relationship doesn’t inherently make it special. He is special, we are very close friends and have been here for each other a long time. (doesn’t hurt that i also find him very attractive)
Should I go for it or hold back on the off chance i’ll regret losing it to someone i’m not dating ?
I know no relationship would come out of it but I am thinking but of going for it because the first time is scary and ik he cares for me and will make me as comfortable as he can (sometimes i struggle w my mental heath and he’s happy to stay on the phone all night cheering me up). Everyone has to lose it and losing it in a relationship doesn’t inherently make it special. He is special, we are very close friends and have been here for each other a long time. (doesn’t hurt that i also find him very attractive)
Should I go for it or hold back on the off chance i’ll regret losing it to someone i’m not dating ?
Listen I think the issue is, do you want to wait until you find someone special/you're romantically involved with to have sex with?
If you do (by the way, I would recommend this as it makes sex something completely different), then wait. HOwever, if you want to have sex just to have sex and don't feel that in the future should you meet someone you wanted to have sex with as your first time you'll be sad, then go for it.
I had a similar oppotunity to have sex for the first time with my fwb BUT decided against it bc i wanted to wait until i was with someone who i was head over heels for - and i am still very thankful to this day that I held off because i think of the first time i had sex very romantically and it couldn't have been better. If i had had it with the fwb guy i would have regretted it bc it would have been my first experience having sex, when it could have been so much more special (as it thankfully turned out to be).
It's really up to you and how well you know yourself mentally. Good luck!
If you do (by the way, I would recommend this as it makes sex something completely different), then wait. HOwever, if you want to have sex just to have sex and don't feel that in the future should you meet someone you wanted to have sex with as your first time you'll be sad, then go for it.
I had a similar oppotunity to have sex for the first time with my fwb BUT decided against it bc i wanted to wait until i was with someone who i was head over heels for - and i am still very thankful to this day that I held off because i think of the first time i had sex very romantically and it couldn't have been better. If i had had it with the fwb guy i would have regretted it bc it would have been my first experience having sex, when it could have been so much more special (as it thankfully turned out to be).
It's really up to you and how well you know yourself mentally. Good luck!
Up to you. And honestly, as you two get older, I wouldn’t brush off the idea of being in a relationship because the wisest thing I’ve heard from an adult is, “The best person to be in a relationship with is a best friend you’d like to f*ck”. And if we’re being honest, he wasn’t wrong. And if you to can enjoy that moment with each other, then I’d say go for it, it might lead to a relationship that you’d both love being in.
However, if you don’t think you’ll pursue him ever, then I’d really think about it carefully. It could possibly make things awkward, but if you both decide that it’s what you want to do, then that’s up to you.
Just remember, do lots of foreplay with each other before hand, otherwise it may not be that enjoyable. And even though you may not be experienced, don’t be afraid to ask him to try doing certain things to you to make it feel better. First time will never guarantee a good time, but if you both want to, you can enjoy yourselves and maybe get each other off in the process.
Good luck!
However, if you don’t think you’ll pursue him ever, then I’d really think about it carefully. It could possibly make things awkward, but if you both decide that it’s what you want to do, then that’s up to you.
Just remember, do lots of foreplay with each other before hand, otherwise it may not be that enjoyable. And even though you may not be experienced, don’t be afraid to ask him to try doing certain things to you to make it feel better. First time will never guarantee a good time, but if you both want to, you can enjoy yourselves and maybe get each other off in the process.
Good luck!
Original post by emma4700
We’ve been friends for 1.5 years and talked romantically at first but realised we’re better as friends. After that realisation we drifted apart a bit but still spoke daily and have pretty much the entire time we’ve known each other. Recently we’ve become a lot closer and sometimes conversations go a little sExual. He’s expressed that he finds me very attractive and during a sExual talk said he’d be happy to lose his virginity to me but that it’s up to me as he knows i don’t like doing stuff outside of relationships.
I know no relationship would come out of it but I am thinking but of going for it because the first time is scary and ik he cares for me and will make me as comfortable as he can (sometimes i struggle w my mental heath and he’s happy to stay on the phone all night cheering me up). Everyone has to lose it and losing it in a relationship doesn’t inherently make it special. He is special, we are very close friends and have been here for each other a long time. (doesn’t hurt that i also find him very attractive)
Should I go for it or hold back on the off chance i’ll regret losing it to someone i’m not dating ?
I know no relationship would come out of it but I am thinking but of going for it because the first time is scary and ik he cares for me and will make me as comfortable as he can (sometimes i struggle w my mental heath and he’s happy to stay on the phone all night cheering me up). Everyone has to lose it and losing it in a relationship doesn’t inherently make it special. He is special, we are very close friends and have been here for each other a long time. (doesn’t hurt that i also find him very attractive)
Should I go for it or hold back on the off chance i’ll regret losing it to someone i’m not dating ?
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