Ive posted about this before but it’s still driving me insane ): I’ll start off by saying I’m a 17 year old girl. Ever since I broke up with my last boyfriend I’ve started to question my sexuality because I lost feelings for him because he was overly clingy. When I started to notice I was losing feelings I started panicking and asking myself if the real reason I didn’t want to be with him anymore was because I was truly a lesbian. This idea of me being lesbian formed out of nowhere, it’s really starting to affect my mental health, to mention this has been bothering me since March ): I’m constantly getting anxious over my sexuality, I’ve watched lesbian porn and I’ve enjoyed it and have found it appealing but I wouldn’t try to do anything sexual with a girl in real life. Porn is also apart of the reason I’ve been constantly questioning my sexuality, it’s not normal for me to be appealed to lesbian porn, is it? I get so anxious about over the idea of being lesbian to the point where I’m constantly google searching signs that I’m lesbian or ill read about people’s coming out stories. One day when I was searching, I found out about HOCD, which is basically false intrusive thoughts about your sexuality. I relate so so much to all of the symptoms of HOCD and I’m convinced I may have it but I’m scared I’m just in denial and scared about being a lesbian. I’ve considered myself straight all of my life, I’ve been in 2 relationships and I’ve always had crushes on guys. I feel like my anxiety has gotten so bad to the point where my brain is tricking me into confessing that I’m a lesbian. This is all very stressful!! I’m not homophobic at all, I just see myself marrying a man but then I have a fear that I’m living a lie and my brain is trying to tell me the truth which is that I’m a lesbian. I’ve never questioned my sexuality until now, this has added so much stress into my life, I don’t want to be lesbian, I don’t want to be constantly worried about my sexuality, I really want to go back to the days where I wouldn’t even question if I were a lesbian. I’m so so scared, I don’t know how to cope with this fear, I wake up in the morning and the first thing my brain tells me is “you’re lesbian” and then I stress about it for the whole day ): does this sound like denial or anxiety? Help would be very appreciated, I feel trapped in my thoughts, I’ve never felt so alone ):