I'm a second year Computer Science student at a top Russell Group university, I went through first year mostly depressed and unable to do the required work and through cheating made it to second year.
I spent most of my first year depressed and stuck in my room, sleeping 12-14 hours a day. I hated university life, while everyone was out enjoying their time at uni I was stuck with the postgrads in my hall, who understandably, didn't want to go out and do stuff. My coursemates are your typical CS students who play video games, etc etc.
When the covid-19 pandemic hit I already dropped out but re-entered uni since the exams were going to be easy. When I moved home I got some mental health help and started getting better, The exams were open book + 24 hours so you barely had to study to pass and I bagged myself easy passes for all my exams, including the deferred first term ones. This didn't mean I understood or even learned the content however. I barely studied all year and was thrown a lifeline or miracle.
I don't know how to code very well or know the basics of discrete maths (I only need to do 3 or so lectures from first year to catch up however). I am struggling so hard on the content in second year since I just don't have good enough coding skills to do most of the coursework and don't even know how to approach most of the Qs.
I'm far behind on lecture content, even though I attend and go through the work, I'm not understanding it, even the ones which require no pre-requisite knowledge cos I have no resources to learn - the lecturer can't speak english well and hasn't given us a textbook/reading list or very descriptive slides. I've spent 6+ hours trying to go through his lecture and can't understand a single thing.
I don't want to do another set of open book exams cos then I'll have left no skills when I graduate and be in a worse position than when I started. I have no idea what to do, I was thinking about taking the year out and catching up on first year stuff and dodging the online uni experience or completely withdrawing & doing a different course.
I've gone from A*A*A in A levels to a complete failure at university, I don't have any extracirruculars or side projects to be competitive enough to even get into a summer internship and missed all my spring week applications for IB last year because of depression, despite pretty much an easy pass into them since I already had IB experience pre-university.
Even if I get an interview I won't be able to pass the coding or theory based tests. I've applied for all non tech but tech internships such as tech consulting or trading floor research.
I enjoy Computer Science but don't have any enthuasism or motivation to study since I'm angry, stressed and confused half the time.