The Student Room Group

Why has he gone cold suddenly after being interested?

From the start there was attraction from the moment we met in the gym the way he winked at me etc. He works there, Walking past the area he trains heard “there she is” . I emailed him at some point from there he asked for my number texted me from his personal phone. He started helping me with bench press aot always told me to text him to check if hes there or let him know when I'm in. He often comes up bringing his face close close behind me leaning in. He grabbed my hands before on the bench press putting my hand in the right place like no let me admiring my hands. I went too far back on the bench hit him he didn't move stayed there . He's started walking upstairs after asking if I needed to get my stuff saying let me walk you,

One of his close friends were training next to where we were he called her over over saying just my name almost like she would know who I was and she came and said hello etc He fist pumped me one time and i rubbed his hand and he didn't move it and came closer seemed to be more available after. I've seen him past 3/4 weeks since then although he hasn't always told me to text but always did because he told to before , not sure if it was becoming routine. I knew he was always being extra personal with me trying to get closer at times. Now recently he text me after saying he wasn't free that day to help here's my work number text me . Maybe I got too dependent on him texting him to see if he was around? Should I give him space see if he comes around and not text him at all? It feels so awkward text his work phone going backwards.
Sounds like he’s trying to move you to being a professional acquaintance now instead of friends and telling you to only contact him through work channels.
Reply 2
Original post by GabiAbi84
Sounds like he’s trying to move you to being a professional acquaintance now instead of friends and telling you to only contact him through work channels.

It's weird hes the one who wanted to be personal? is he maybe getting annoyed if I've gmber gotten over dependent on him?
I feel like maybe he might miss the chase or something? was thinking of not texting him at all cause it's too weird to go to his work number giving him space?
Original post by Anonymous
It's weird hes the one who wanted to be personal? is he maybe getting annoyed if I've gmber gotten over dependent on him?
I feel like maybe he might miss the chase or something? was thinking of not texting him at all cause it's too weird to go to his work number giving him space?


Sounds like he’s realised that the relationship should be professional instead.
Maybe that’s just how he gets clients if he’s a personal trainer by making them think he’s interested.
If you don’t want to contact him, don’t. If you want something more, ask.
Reply 4
Original post by GabiAbi84
Sounds like he’s realised that the relationship should be professional instead.
Maybe that’s just how he gets clients if he’s a personal trainer by making them think he’s interested.
If you don’t want to contact him, don’t. If you want something more, ask.

Its weird cause its been like almost a year and he definitely seemed interested? or do you think he might want space? I wasn't really training with him anymore and he never really saw me as a client. He's always acted way extra with me. Even one of the guys who helped me out one time were like you used to train with him. He's always touching and responded back to mine there was a vibe chemistry.
I don't know I do feel like maybe because I texted him all the time asking if he was there to help? hes getting annoyed at that even though hes the one who wanted it initially. Maybe I just give him space maybe he felt the chase was over or something as well ? don't text him at all? there definitely was something there and he spoke about me to his friends etc. The text caught me off guard . I didn't reply left it on read . Maybe I give him space stop depending on him it's a weird situation . I was even myself starting to wonder that I could be over dependent without realising .
Original post by Anonymous
Its weird cause its been like almost a year and he definitely seemed interested? or do you think he might want space? I wasn't really training with him anymore and he never really saw me as a client. He's always acted way extra with me. Even one of the guys who helped me out one time were like you used to train with him. He's always touching and responded back to mine there was a vibe chemistry.
I don't know I do feel like maybe because I texted him all the time asking if he was there to help? hes getting annoyed at that even though hes the one who wanted it initially. Maybe I just give him space maybe he felt the chase was over or something as well ? don't text him at all? there definitely was something there and he spoke about me to his friends etc. The text caught me off guard . I didn't reply left it on read . Maybe I give him space stop depending on him it's a weird situation . I was even myself starting to wonder that I could be over dependent without realising .


It’s been a year and nothing has happened?
Doesn’t sound like anything was ever going to happen tbh.
Don’t start playing stupid games. Either ask him out or move on.
Reply 6
Original post by GabiAbi84
It’s been a year and nothing has happened?
Doesn’t sound like anything was ever going to happen tbh.
Don’t start playing stupid games. Either ask him out or move on.

Well more months there was lockdowns in between. But it definitely felt like we were getting closer only the lockdowns were happening.
It's weird he introduced me to his friend randomly as well . I'm not sure how I'd ask him out after that . There definitely strong chemistry , I had noticed it changed recently . He gave his personal number for a reason. and the other day during bench we were chatting a lot , complimented him something about his training saying his arms were getting bigger it's working. Noticed he was standing much closer to the bench as well. He gave fist pump at some point I did that and grabbed rubbed his hand he didn't move away. And offered to get me in for like a extra bench to help me. At the end after I went to wipe the bench instead of leaving him to do it he was like "you hardworking woman" . We flirted a lot . Or should I give it time don't text him or anything train with someone new. I feel awkward around him now after that feel like I need to take a step back for a while. He definitely seems like a guy who enjoys attention and hes competitive he may just enjoy the chase felt he "got me"
Original post by Anonymous
Well more months there was lockdowns in between. But it definitely felt like we were getting closer only the lockdowns were happening.
It's weird he introduced me to his friend randomly as well . I'm not sure how I'd ask him out after that . There definitely strong chemistry , I had noticed it changed recently . He gave his personal number for a reason. and the other day during bench we were chatting a lot , complimented him something about his training saying his arms were getting bigger it's working. Noticed he was standing much closer to the bench as well. He gave fist pump at some point I did that and grabbed rubbed his hand he didn't move away. And offered to get me in for like a extra bench to help me. At the end after I went to wipe the bench instead of leaving him to do it he was like "you hardworking woman" . We flirted a lot . Or should I give it time don't text him or anything train with someone new. I feel awkward around him now after that feel like I need to take a step back for a while. He definitely seems like a guy who enjoys attention and hes competitive he may just enjoy the chase felt he "got me"


None of that is anything new to what you have already said.
You flirted-nothing happened, now he’s pulled back.
Either make a move or move on.
ask him
Reply 9
Original post by GabiAbi84
None of that is anything new to what you have already said.
You flirted-nothing happened, now he’s pulled back.
Either make a move or move on.

Would he not pull away further if I ask him out? if hes already pulling away? maybe I'll ask him eventually give him space for now maybe in few weeks see whats up. also cause I still have to see him around the gym . Would there be a reason he pulled back?
Original post by Anonymous
Would he not pull away further if I ask him out? if hes already pulling away? maybe I'll ask him eventually give him space for now maybe in few weeks see whats up. also cause I still have to see him around the gym . Would there be a reason he pulled back?


He’s not interested or has found someone else.

Move on.
Original post by GabiAbi84
He’s not interested or has found someone else.

Move on.co

Will the interest come back ? like he seemed super interested at the start
Original post by Anonymous
Will the interest come back ? like he seemed super interested at the start


Why would it?
Like I said, you flirted and nothing happened. Now instead of making a move towards something he’s making a move away.

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