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i like two girls, and feel horrible

Hi, I had a girl friend for about 3 years, she broke up with me just over a year ago. i didnt rush into another relationship instead I concentrated on other things such as uni, and thought to my self if I ever get in another relationship it'll be something serious not just a few months.

So I wasnt really looking for a gf at first, but at the start of the summer I met 2 girls, I didnt rush into a relationship with them, and as a result felt like they pushed me away maybe because I made them feel like I wasnt interested. I only see them about every 2 or 3 weeks, and usually isnt very physical, about a month ago I felt like I was drifting away from them both and was thinking about dropping contact with them.

But, about 2-3 weeks ago one of the girls came up to me and told me she really liked me, so I asked her if she wanted to meet up, a little bit more frequently. This was to help understand how we really felt about each other, she said she wants to but is to busy with uni/work, and wait till she gets back for christmas holidays, so I did but have only seen her once since then.

The other girl, i had pretty much given up on until about 2 weeks ago, when she then text me asking me if I wanted to go out with her christmas eve. So I went out with her christmas eve, but we've made no plans to meet again, i also have no plans to meet the first girl.

The thing is I know the first girls brother from school, and when I first met up with her he wasnt happy, but his sister said nothing was happening between us and that was the end of it.
The second girl Ive known for quite a few years, and sometimes feel like were really close friends, and I like being friends with her, in terms of a relationship its a little weird, when I ask her if she wants to do something she sounds really enthusiastic about going out with me but says shes busy and wont be able to see me for another week or so, which is one of the main reasons we dont see each other very often, kinda like she doesnt have the time for me :s, but then when she is with me she gives the impression she wants to stay with me, texts me after saying thanks for the night and all that, but then doesnt arrange to see me again for 2 weeks.

Honestly, at the moment, I think about the second girl more, but sometimes think I have more in common with the first girl and she'll be better for me.

Im pretty certain the second girl knows I like her because I bought something up about it on christmas eve. The first girl hasnt spoke to me for about 3 days, ive got a worrying feeling that its because I went out with the other girl on christmas eve.

I feel like texting the second girl telling her how I feel. I guess im worried that if the second girl says she likes me ill go out with her and ruin everything between me and the first girl, or make the first girl really upset.

:frown:

sorry about the long post and thanks for any advice.

Reply 1

amsie/

that's kinda greedy :nothing:

ummmm... don't go for either, that way there'll be no hard feelings between them :biggrin:

Reply 2

Roo Bix

Play it a little more cool with the second girl. It's almost as if the first girl is an alternative, because you have a certain type of friendship that has psychological obstacles with the second girl (you feel a bit odd hooking up with her and lack incentive to make moves).

It may be the case that she's aware that you haven't made any moves and/or you're unsure whether you want to go out with her or not.

Increase conversations, phone her and see how she is every now and again, she should pick up the hints that you're interested in her.