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Can't seem to approach girls in any situation Watch

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    Hey people,

    I have a serious problem when it comes to girls. I see girls when im just out casually shopping or whatever, at the pub, clubbing etc. Never and I mean never have the balls to go up to them and strike up a convo with them probably due to the fear of rejection and having no idea what to say.

    I have quite high standards of girls but i see quite a lot of attractive girls when i go out, i just have it in my head that i have to be very drunk to even look at them

    I'm 21 soon and im still a virgin and i dont think im a bad looking guy, i just think its my major lack of confidence...

    Just wanna know some advice as it feels like everyone around me is able to get with whatever girl they like whenever they try!
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    Relax, and don't set yourself up to fall, just go with what comes naturally when conversing. And like Ape says, see if there's any eye contact - don't make that mistake alot of guys make where they will begin a conversation, to only then get shuffled along within the first few seconds because there was no prior enticement.
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    I get my mates saying to me that girls are giving me looks but im just too shy to do anything about it... they even say lets go over ill be your wingman... it is poor on my side lol
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I get my mates saying to me that girls are giving me looks but im just too shy to do anything about it... they even say lets go over ill be your wingman... it is poor on my side lol
    Well in personal experience Ive found that pressure from mates always ruins romance. Its about a leap of faith. The trick is to remove yourself from the equation. Dont think about what youll get out of it/ will lose if you fail. Dont even bother with wingmen. Its about a 1 on 1 encounter, I used to be nervous about girls too, youve just got to trust yourself that this girl might like you, and if she doesnt, her loss.
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    Hello, I fully understand the situation you currently find yourself in. I am quite the same way inclined, very shy/reserved and often struggle to find ways to approach a girl. Conclusively, I personally do not think there is any hard or fast rules to approaching girls. Additionally, I think that if your going to approach a girl, its best said, to do so on your own. Because at the end of the day, you could approach her with your friends initially, but, ultimately it is you that is going to have to meet her from there onwards.

    Now I am no expert, I am shy like you, and so in regards to my situation I have yet to actually approach a girl myself as such. As I have never actually, shall I put it, successfully approached girls. So I suppose in a sense, I could really do with taking a leaf out of my own book! But hey, I'm just here to point you in the right direction. In terms of myself, I basically just focus on some other aspect in my life, most notably my education. I have confidence in the fact that, if I focus on this rather than girls, life becomes much easier and more manageable. Therefore I feel less emotional and empty inside as such, its all about distractions of the mind.
    Plus, if you focus on your education, or something of benefit, in the future you will be more equipped in terms of finance with a adequate career and so girls will be more accepting of you. Or even hobbies? You may well meet plenty of females which match your interests and you could find yourself a female counterpart! Good luck and I hope my answer has provided you with some clarity and reflection. If you want to talk further PM me, all the best.
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    (Original post by royal1990)
    Hello, I fully understand the situation you currently find yourself in. I am quite the same way inclined, very shy/reserved and often struggle to find ways to approach a girl. Conclusively, I personally do not think there is any hard or fast rules to approaching girls. Additionally, I think that if your going to approach a girl, its best said, to do so on your own. Because at the end of the day, you could approach her with your friends initially, but, ultimately it is you that is going to have to meet her from there onwards.

    Now I am no expert, I am shy like you, and so in regards to my situation I have yet to actually approach a girl myself as such. As I have never actually, shall I put it, successfully approached girls. So I suppose in a sense, I could really do with taking a leaf out of my own book! But hey, I'm just here to point you in the right direction. In terms of myself, I basically just focus on some other aspect in my life, most notably my education. I have confidence in the fact that, if I focus on this rather than girls, life becomes much easier and more manageable. Therefore I feel less emotional and empty inside as such, its all about distractions of the mind.
    Plus, if you focus on your education, or something of benefit, in the future you will be more equipped in terms of finance with a adequate career and so girls will be more accepting of you. Or even hobbies? You may well meet plenty of females which match your interests and you could find yourself a female counterpart! Good luck and I hope my answer has provided you with some clarity and reflection. If you want to talk further PM me, all the best.
    Its true that girls dont usually make a move like ape gone insane says, but they do it quite a lot to recluses like royal. Girls like recluses because they aim to break them out of their shell. Not saying you should barricade yourself inside and live alone for the rest of your life, but women often appear in your life unexpectedly, so all the trying with girls in the world might not work. Let us know how it goes
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    (Original post by goodeye)
    Its true that girls dont usually make a move like ape gone insane says, but they do it quite a lot to recluses like royal. Girls like recluses because they aim to break them out of their shell. Not saying you should barricade yourself inside and live alone for the rest of your life, but women often appear in your life unexpectedly, so all the trying with girls in the world might not work. Let us know how it goes
    What exactly warrants you ("goodeye") to refer to me as a "recluse". Obviously you are insinuating that I am a reclusive individual. In which case, you are mistaken. This is an internet forum, you do not know me in person, but only by my description of myself. Which last time I looked not all shy/reserved people are recluses. I generally do not bother replying to witty/sarcastic and critical comments on here, but you are the exception to the rule. Stop been so bold and judgmental with your comments. I was trying to help the questioner by giving constructive and positive advice, something which many TSR users are inept at doing because of narrow-mindedness. If people do not have positive things to say, they should refrain from doing so. I agree, sometimes you have got to be "cruel to be kind" but in order to do so you have to approach this situation with the right clarity before diving in and giving people criticism and displaying arrogance.
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    (Original post by royal1990)
    What exactly warrants you ("goodeye&quot to refer to me as a "recluse". Obviously you are insinuating that I am a reclusive individual. In which case, you are mistaken. This is an internet forum, you do not know me in person, but only by my description of myself. Which last time I looked not all shy/reserved people are recluses. I generally do not bother replying to witty/sarcastic and critical comments on here, but you are the exception to the rule. Stop been so bold and judgmental with your comments. I was trying to help the questioner by giving constructive and positive advice, something which many TSR users are inept at doing because of narrow-mindedness. If people do not have positive things to say, they should refrain from doing so. I agree, sometimes you have got to be "cruel to be kind" but in order to do so you have to approach this situation with the right clarity before diving in and giving people criticism and displaying arrogance.
    Fine you arent a recluse it makes no difference to my point.
 
 
 
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