I really like him but I can't have him and it really hurts... :'(

I met this guy through my friend about a month ago and we slept at his. I ended up sharing his bed and we were cuddling. Since that night I slept at his a few more times and we always cuddled and kissed and stuff. Then one night he asked me out and I said yeah but then he changed his mind around 20 minutes later saying it wasn't the right time. I understood because he was going through some stuff and we just went back to cuddling and kissing etc.
Then a week or so ago he got a girlfriend and didn't meet me until his birthday so I could give him his card. All we did that day was talk for a bit and hug a couple of times and his girlfriend was there so I didn't think much of it when he text me saying something like, 'love u 2, we are bffl'.
Then he didn't meet me again until last night at about 11:30 asking me to get a taxi and come meet him because his girlfriend was away and he didn't want to be alone. I know it was wrong but I really missed him and called a taxi and met him around midnight. We went back to his and cuddled in his bed and kissed a few times.
He said that he misses me and he's sorry and he doesn't know why he got with his girlfriend. Now, I don't think he will end it with his girlfriend and even if he does I doubt he will want to be with me but I just don't know what to do because I REALLY like him and I just can't stop thinking about him... I also really miss him and I was nearly in tears early today when I saw my friend and her boyfriend kissing and being all cute together...

What can I do...? Please don't say forget about him because it's impossible... :frown:

Reply 1

stephen_1995

4

Sounds a right tosser tbh, playing two lasses off at the same time like that. Forget about him, he's not worthy, hes cheating on his girlfriend with you. Probably wouldn't think twice about doing it to you if you ended up together.

Reply 2

Moofie10

Just tell him that you're not the kind of girl that goes behind other people's backs, and that you don't want to be with someone who thinks it's ok, so he has to choose. If he chooses you great, if he chooses his girlfriend you have to stop going around when he calls. He's never going to take you seriously or choose you if you make it so easy for him to have you both.

In my opinion you should forget him (what if he picks you and does the same behind your back??) I don't think he's worth it, but hey, goodluck! x

Reply 3

Clone93

6

It most certainly isn't impossible to forget him. All you need to do is distance yourself from him and cut all communication. No one is so special that they won't be forgotten.

Reply 4

Moura

18

maybe just think about the fact that while he did this with you on this particular night... the next night as soon as his gf got back he would have probably hugged and kissed her and had sex with her in exactly the same bed, told her he missed her and is so happy to see her etc. the same things he told you plus more, since he actually wanted to make things official with this girl. he had the opportunity with you but decided against it, he later got a new girlfriend. if he didn't want to be with her then he wouldn't, he'd be with you. i'm sorry it's kind of harsh to say but... you know it. he just wants to have his cake and eat it too.

Reply 5

TheRealDarthVader

14

Does she have big tits?

Reply 6

Sophie_girl

11

yuck, what a snake - he has a girlfriend.

if you ever got with him he'd probably do the same.

also just LOL at you calling yourself a taxi to go meet him at 12 at his beck and call. absoutely desperate and he's doing it because it's an ego boost.

Reply 7

im so academic

15

Original post by LillyLisa

I met this guy through my friend about a month ago and we slept at his. I ended up sharing his bed and we were cuddling. Since that night I slept at his a few more times and we always cuddled and kissed and stuff. Then one night he asked me out and I said yeah but then he changed his mind around 20 minutes later saying it wasn't the right time. I understood because he was going through some stuff and we just went back to cuddling and kissing etc.
Then a week or so ago he got a girlfriend and didn't meet me until his birthday so I could give him his card. All we did that day was talk for a bit and hug a couple of times and his girlfriend was there so I didn't think much of it when he text me saying something like, 'love u 2, we are bffl'.
Then he didn't meet me again until last night at about 11:30 asking me to get a taxi and come meet him because his girlfriend was away and he didn't want to be alone. I know it was wrong but I really missed him and called a taxi and met him around midnight. We went back to his and cuddled in his bed and kissed a few times.
He said that he misses me and he's sorry and he doesn't know why he got with his girlfriend. Now, I don't think he will end it with his girlfriend and even if he does I doubt he will want to be with me but I just don't know what to do because I REALLY like him and I just can't stop thinking about him... I also really miss him and I was nearly in tears early today when I saw my friend and her boyfriend kissing and being all cute together...

What can I do...? Please don't say forget about him because it's impossible... :frown:

I'm sorry but I have no sympathy. You should be grateful for the fact that you have had some intimacy with him. From your thread title it seems as if your feelings were all unrequited, and yet you kissed him?

Be grrateful for that. Many girls do not have get a glimmer of attention from the guys they desire. It is far better to some something and lose it, than not have had it at all. It might not be everything, but you are in a far better position than many girls could ever hope to be.

Reply 8

bubblyraindrop

8

He sounds like a douche. He has a girlfriend but he kissed you. He's playing two girls at the same time. I know you really like him but imagine if he did get with you, how would you know he wasn't kissing and cuddling some other girl while you're his girlfriend?

Reply 9

Zarek

21

It will all end in tears..

Reply 10

OrangeTwo

2

You should know better than that. Have some self worth.

Reply 11

Spongebob'sPants

14

How do people get in such situations?

Why are you laying in bed with a guy when he has a gf?

Why are you getting a taxi at midnight over to his just cos he clicked his fingers?

Jesus.

Reply 12

Canaduh

5

It's like you're the dog and he's the master. You're following his orders and he's getting joy out of it.

Reply 13

Ultimate1

Men take note: the more girls you can get or have the more your value and attraction increases in other girl's eyes. This is called pre selection.

As for the guy he sounds like a grade A douche, and I'm pretty sure most will call him that, yet he has two girls scrambling for him (pretty sure many many more). Go figure.

(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 14

Journeyzap

11

Sort of been there, done that.

He is a scumbag, he is using you as an ego boost and playing around with two girls. Try to get some selfrespect, as harsh as it sounds, and just break things off with him. It is guaranteed by the way he behaves that he will play you around too were you to go out together. It sounds like he just doesn't want to be alone, regardless of whom he is with, rather than feeling anything special for you.

Just cut contact, you'll forget him over time and meet someone better. Don't meet up one on one with someone who has a relationship, don't encourage cheating and anyway, why would you want to end up with someone who doesn't know himself, his emotions or to stay loyal? Think about it.

Reply 15

FriarLawrenceIII

6

I watched a "how I met your mother" episode (hooked) on this the other day, which seems to describe your situation pretty well. Whilst I don't usually recommend following the advice of TV shows, it is pretty obvious he's just stringing you along. You want something that he can't provide, so it is probably best if you cut ties with him, to save yourself further heartbreak.

Reply 16

The_Super_Nerd(:

11

I'm afraid to say he is using you. You (and his girlfriend) will only get hurt in the end, and he will not care about how much he's hurt either of you. I know you like him, I know how it feels but I also know guys like him and they are not the kind of guys that are worth being with.

Reply 17

~ Aquamarine ~

17

I think you should forget about him, clearly doesn't seem like boyfriend material and is using you. I think you should distance yourself before it escalates, you don't want to be known as 'the other girl'