Friends staying at home want to come to my freshers

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Dan.E
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So my 3 closest friends are not going to uni and instead are getting jobs but keep asking when my freshers is so that they can book time off work and join me.

The problem is as much as I want to stay in touch with them and would love for them to come visit me occasionally I don't know if I want them around for my first ever freshers. I mean its a time for me to meet new people and get used to the area not hang around with my current mates even if it would be fun with them around as I feel if they came up I'd spend most of my time with them rather than mixing whether its intentional or not.

What do you lot think, would you mind having your friends from home joining you at your freshers?
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College_Dropout
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I think you are right.
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brownsugar-xx
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Would they even get into any of the uni events if they're not students?
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Katie_p
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Not that I really took part in Freshers at all, I'd hate it.
University is your opportunity to meet new people, and start the rest of your life, and Freshers is a huge part of that! If you attend events with a group of friends, you'll not meet as many people, and you might miss out on those initial steps that forge friendships that will last forever!
Your friends made the decision to stay at home (or failed to get into Uni, in which case I understand a bit more their enthusiasm) and they shouldn't expect to elbow their way into your future. If you're really close, you'll stay friends despite making new ones at Uni, and if you're not so close, don't even consider letting them come! They should understand that even though you want to remain friends with them, and do things together, this is the first opportunity for you to make friends who will be there for you when these friends cannot - for things related to study, your University and the local area. If they don't get that, time to move on anyway!
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Bloxorus
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Don't bring them with you. If you're hanging around with them you won't meet new people.
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Dan.E
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(Original post by College_Dropout)
I think you are right.
Thanks

(Original post by brownsugar-xx)
Would they even get into any of the uni events if they're not students?
Not uni organised event, they're thinking more so of going clubs ect.
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Dan.E
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Ok thanks guys, you seem to all agree with me which is great I guess!

Hopefully they will understand where I am coming from when I tell them that I'd rather not have them there for freshers.
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brownsugar-xx
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(Original post by Dan.E)
Thanks



Not uni organised event, they're thinking more so of going clubs ect.
Yeah i thought so, in my opinion tell them that you'll need Freshers for yourself to establish friends and stuff but that they can come round after.
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bokkie96
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I kind of see their point. They are probably worried that you are going to find new friends and forget about them, but they need to see your point too. I wouldn't bring them with. Freshers is your time to meet new friends and get a feel of life without them.

Try find a nice way of explaining this to them. Maybe say that you want Freshers by yourself but they are more than welcome to meet up with you after that period?

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bumblebee342
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(Original post by Dan.E)
So my 3 closest friends are not going to uni and instead are getting jobs but keep asking when my freshers is so that they can book time off work and join me.

The problem is as much as I want to stay in touch with them and would love for them to come visit me occasionally I don't know if I want them around for my first ever freshers. I mean its a time for me to meet new people and get used to the area not hang around with my current mates even if it would be fun with them around as I feel if they came up I'd spend most of my time with them rather than mixing whether its intentional or not.

What do you lot think, would you mind having your friends from home joining you at your freshers?
The way I see it is that your friends can come and visit you and go out at any point.

For me, freshers was important in being with my flatmates and mixing with other people from my halls. We got talking to people in the first week who lived nowhere near us, who I still see now and talk to. I think having friends from home around would have stopped me from talking to as many people, because I would've stuck with them instead of socialising with new people.

I'd recommend using the time to go out with your flatmates or any other friends you make at the start Your friends should understand where you're coming from!
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WarriorLlama
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Everyone will go to the Fresher organised events. They will not be allowed into these, only you will. Just tell them that tickets are only available to University students, then suggest them visiting a few weeks later.

If you invite them to your Freshers week, they will get in the way of you meeting new people and making new friends.
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Shefflibs
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Noooo, you will miss out on meeting so many new people. Invite them down when you are settled
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chemistrykid123
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Yeah do not let these people bring you down and lower how fun freshers is going to be it is probably one of the best times of your life, meeting new people, doing new things living outside your comfort zone the possibilities are endless enjoy them yourself with other people from the uni!
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Klix88
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At my uni, non-uni students couldn't get into Freshers events anyway. You need a wristband for entry and these are only given to freshers (one per person, student ID card required to collect, name checked off a central list so you can't come back for more).

Unis are wise to locals trying to gatecrash student events for the cheap booze and they do their best to make sure it doesn't happen. Just tell your mates that it's not up to you and it isn't going to happen.
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Red Richie
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(Original post by brownsugar-xx)
Would they even get into any of the uni events if they're not students?
This. Even if its not necessarily true, use this as an excuse to tell them not to come.

I think you should focus on getting to know your flatmates and new people during freshers week. Your mates can always come over some other time, but freshers is not the right time IMO
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OnionRing
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Ahhh I was in this situation last year but I was the friend

Yeah don't bring them. My mate was completely honest with me and said he wanted to meet new people and settle in first before I could visit him

Hopefully they'll understand!!
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deedee123
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definitely not, you need to make new friends.
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victoriajackson
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(Original post by Dan.E)
So my 3 closest friends are not going to uni and instead are getting jobs but keep asking when my freshers is so that they can book time off work and join me.

The problem is as much as I want to stay in touch with them and would love for them to come visit me occasionally I don't know if I want them around for my first ever freshers. I mean its a time for me to meet new people and get used to the area not hang around with my current mates even if it would be fun with them around as I feel if they came up I'd spend most of my time with them rather than mixing whether its intentional or not.

What do you lot think, would you mind having your friends from home joining you at your freshers?
I wouldn't personally or maybe like the last event one day but definitely not having a constant stream of old friends, freshers is for making new friends there's plenty of time in the year for old ones. Just tell them it's students only or something
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cole-slaw
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Tell them they can come next year instead. But this year its about you striking out alone, making your own friends and your own life at uni.
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andromeda24
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Even though my home friends did not join my during my first few weeks of freshers, they came down more and moreoften later on down the line, and even though i'v made a couple good uni friends i'd say that being with your home friends more does take you away from getting to know other people more! All my home friends got on great with my uni ones, but i wish i'd of invited them down a little less as there are some people i met in freshers who I wish i'd gotten to know better, but that's what second year is for hey!
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