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    (Original post by ABsmazing)
    Surely there should have to be an agreement for the relationship to be monogamous, why should I just assume it is.
    Yes, but there also has to be an agreement it be polyamorous, it shouldn't be assumed either way
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    (Original post by Blondie987)
    Yes, but there also has to be an agreement it be polyamorous, it shouldn't be assumed either way
    In that case i've never cheated.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Would you ever cheat on a partner? Have you ever cheated? Personally I cannot imagine a situation in which I would betray a partner in this way, particularly having experienced it myself, and cannot understand why someone would.
    it depends on what your defining as cheating
    a- any form of intercourse
    b-secondary relationship with no sexual exchange
    c- flirtation

    as for me
    a- no i wouldn't
    b- maybe as it looks good to pull up to and networking event in a convertible ferrari at 45, your jewellery catching the light and your gold tooth the highlight of a face ravaged by long nights as well as caffeine and other drugs with a woman on your arm that is paying her way through university and must be half your age at the most
    c- it part of the sell you try making a sale without a little flirtation not so much as to make it awkward between you but just enough subtle to pull a sale and make some more money
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    Definitely not. I don't find other people attractive when I'm in a relationship anyway.
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    i never have cheated and i never will.
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    Nah... my dad cheated on my mum and it tore the whole family apart so after witnessing that I definitely would not cheat
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    (Original post by stefano865)
    Cheating is wrong. Betraying a promise.

    But why do we attach so much importance to monogamy?

    Open relationships are the future.

    Abolishing monogamy will actually save the institution of marriage.


    Open relationships are cheating, you've just agreed it is acceptable to cheat.


    I agree you have a right to an open relationship, but you are just rationalising your degeneracy by claiming it isn't cheating.
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    (Original post by Harami Salami)
    Open relationships are cheating, you've just agreed it is acceptable to cheat.


    I agree you have a right to an open relationship, but you are just rationalising your degeneracy by claiming it isn't cheating.

    No. Get your facts right.

    Google it.
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    (Original post by stefano865)
    No. Get your facts right.

    Google it.
    Anything outside monogamy is cheating, even religious polygamists disgust me, it's actual filth.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    So you don't subscribe to the opinion of 'once a cheat, always a cheat?' May I ask why?
    Well they would say that wouldn't they. If you ask a convict if they're going to commit a crime again they say no, look at the reoffending rate.
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    (Original post by Harami Salami)
    Open relationships are cheating, you've just agreed it is acceptable to cheat.

    I agree you have a right to an open relationship, but you are just rationalising your degeneracy by claiming it isn't cheating.
    I disagree, cheating implies some abrogation of a set of rules (in this sense mutually agreed boundaries of your relations with others), and these rules would be different for people in an 'open' relationship, so you can't really say that is 'cheating', because it's a different game with different rules.


    Not that I agree with 'open' relationships or would enter into one, I just think it's only 'cheating' in the framework of a non-open relationship, you can't apply those rules to the different game.
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    In my view cheating is only really cheating with self-awareness, if you deliberately flirt with another person knowing your partner would not like this that's not acceptable and is a betryal of trust. If you just flirt with somene and you don't even realise it's kind of wrong and arguably it is your fault for not being self-aware but it's not the same.
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    (Original post by Harami Salami)
    Anything outside monogamy is cheating, even religious polygamists disgust me, it's actual filth.

    No. :facepalm:

    An open relationship is an agreement not to be monogamous. Usually under certain conditions.

    'Cheating' is breaking an agreement/promise to be monogamous.
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    (Original post by Shillary)
    I disagree, cheating implies some abrogation of a set of rules (in this sense mutually agreed boundaries of your relations with others), and these rules would be different for people in an 'open' relationship, so you can't really say that is 'cheating', because it's a different game with different rules.


    Not that I agree with 'open' relationships or would enter into one, I just think it's only 'cheating' in the framework of a non-open relationship, you can't apply those rules to the different game.
    I knew someone would argue this

    relationships have rules > monogamy is simply one set of rules > cheating is a breach of the preset rules HOWEVER it's wrong to assume monogamy is the only set of rules


    I have no issue with guys who are full players, no commitment, I have no issue with women who sleep around and decide to have a monogamous relationship afterwards, but if your relationship has turned into a set of rules like a contract you've drawn up, all the beauty of it is lost.
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    (Original post by Harami Salami)
    I knew someone would argue this

    relationships have rules > monogamy is simply one set of rules > cheating is a breach of the preset rules HOWEVER it's wrong to assume monogamy is the only set of rules
    Yep.

    if your relationship has turned into a set of rules like a contract you've drawn up, all the beauty of it is lost.
    I mean, that equally applies to non-open relationships, it's just that people don't feel the need to explain them because it is the norm.


    And invoking notions of "the beauty of it" is pretty subjective and doesn't really operate as an argument against your (reproduction of my) logic above.
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    (Original post by Shillary)
    Yep.


    I mean, that equally applies to non-open relationships, it's just that people don't feel the need to explain them because it is the norm.


    And invoking notions of "the beauty of it" is pretty subjective and doesn't really operate as an argument against your (reproduction of my) logic above.
    Language is itself subjective, so whilst it is true that I am biased and my personal understanding of relationships does not apply to every person, it is perfectly reasonable to believe that anything which does not fall outside monogamy is unfaithful if monogamy is a part of what my understanding of a romantic relationship is.
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    (Original post by Harami Salami)
    Language is itself subjective, so whilst it is true that I am biased and my personal understanding of relationships does not apply to every person, it is perfectly reasonable to believe that anything which does not fall outside monogamy is unfaithful if monogamy is a part of what my understanding of a romantic relationship is.
    That's fair enough, but you can't say things like "Anything outside monogamy is cheating" without the caveat that this rests upon the assumption that a romantic relationship only extends to monogamous relationships (which others would disagree with, and as we disagree with each other's underlying assumptions there's not really much room for consensus).
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    of course everyone on a online forum is going to say no lmao
 
 
 
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