Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    I split up with my short-term boyfriend (we'd only been dating for a few months) over a year ago but he won't leave me alone. The break was messy and after a few months of trying to be civil (mainly because we shared a lot of the same friends) I decided to cut all ties and didn't speak to him for around 6 months. Then recently he invited me and all my friends to a party... Because I'm the most organised I was in charge of plans so ended up speaking to him (mainly over social media) exclusively about it. The plans failed but he kept on messaging me and I then found out he had plans to get me back on Valentine's Day. I decided I needed to have a conversation with him and made it very clear I had no intention of getting back together with him and he seemed to get the message - particularly given that he knows I've had brief encounters with various people since we broke up. However he still kept on texting multiple times in the day and gradually started coming up to me all the time during my frees, break and lunch, trying to arrange to meet all the time. I decided to change tactic and went back to ignoring him. But I slipped up and accidently answered an out of the blue phone call just over a week ago not realising it was him calling. Since then, despite my continued effort to ignore him, he still calls me at least once a day and messages me even though I don't respond! When we were dating he would call me 7 times a day sometimes even though he knew I was at work and so has always been a bit clingy but this is ridiculous particularly given that I've made it very clear that I'm not interested. I don't know what to do?!
    • Section Leader
    • Very Important Poster
    • Peer Support Volunteers
    • Clearing and Applications Advisor
    Online

    21
    ReputationRep:
    Section Leader
    Very Important Poster
    Peer Support Volunteers
    Clearing and Applications Advisor
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I split up with my short-term boyfriend (we'd only been dating for a few months) over a year ago but he won't leave me alone. The break was messy and after a few months of trying to be civil (mainly because we shared a lot of the same friends) I decided to cut all ties and didn't speak to him for around 6 months. Then recently he invited me and all my friends to a party... Because I'm the most organised I was in charge of plans so ended up speaking to him (mainly over social media) exclusively about it. The plans failed but he kept on messaging me and I then found out he had plans to get me back on Valentine's Day. I decided I needed to have a conversation with him and made it very clear I had no intention of getting back together with him and he seemed to get the message - particularly given that he knows I've had brief encounters with various people since we broke up. However he still kept on texting multiple times in the day and gradually started coming up to me all the time during my frees, break and lunch, trying to arrange to meet all the time. I decided to change tactic and went back to ignoring him. But I slipped up and accidently answered an out of the blue phone call just over a week ago not realising it was him calling. Since then, despite my continued effort to ignore him, he still calls me at least once a day and messages me even though I don't respond! When we were dating he would call me 7 times a day sometimes even though he knew I was at work and so has always been a bit clingy but this is ridiculous particularly given that I've made it very clear that I'm not interested. I don't know what to do?!
    Start with blocking him on your phone and just keep avoiding him wherever possible.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    Block him and if he still insists, tell him that you can report him for harassment. From then on, you really should, since you already told him you don't want to see him very clearly. You should never feel like you're actively dodging someone at every opportunity.
    • Very Important Poster
    Offline

    19
    Very Important Poster
    What claire said. i cnat believe you havent blocked him. What you seem unable to do is cut contact. everytime you recontact you open it up and feed his deluded plans that he will win you back. I would have sent hm one e-mail asking him not to cal or contact you as yur relationship is over and you have no wish to talk to him again. Could he please stop doing so because you are feeling harassed, but good lucck with finding someone else more suited to him..

    Cut him off from everything and do not recontact. If he ignores then elevate it to parents, teachers, police, whichever is appropriate. In his mind if he pressures enough you will give in.

    The other alternative is to use peer pressure amngst your group of friends.

    Btw the party was a dumb idea to get involved in.
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: March 23, 2016
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • Poll
    Brussels sprouts
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

    Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

    Quick reply
    Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.