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Has he lost interest?????!!!?

So there's this guy I've been seeing the last few months and we're basically in a relationship but without the label. We talk every day and have the longest conversations about **** all and its doesn't get boring or dry, we meet up, I go to his house quite often and we're just pretty close. But lately I've been thinking he's no longer interested in this....whatever it is. He didn't text me for a whole week. I know y'all may think I'm paranoid or needy but I wasn't even bothered by it cos you know I thought he might have been busy. I decided to text him yesterday and I was like ohh you must have been busy this week and he said and I quote "nope just been enjoying life". Emmmm what....
I'm not saying he can't have a good time but what I also got from that was that he doesn't care about me or hasn't even given me a second thought the whole week. And last Saturday before he stopped texting me when I saw him he seemed a bit weird with me like not the way he usually is but at that time I didn't read anything into it. What do you guys think? Help!

Reply 1

phunky_fresh

I think you need to discuss it with him. I can guess why he may be acting this way, however only he will be able to verify. Ask him if everything is OK with you two and take it from there.

Reply 2

Withengar

My suggestion - define the relationship.

You will not get any desirable results (not often at least) from a person with whom you're in an unlabeled relationship. They have no obligation to you besides what their needs and wishes dictate. The can just as easily talk to you daily as they can not text you for days or even weeks. You can't expect people to treat you the way you want to be treated if you don't sit down and discuss exactly what you want and how you want it.

Your interaction seems to be a very unhealthy relationship, as going that far without defining anything often leads to someone being hurt - in this case you. It is quite possible he just sees you as a "hook-up" or a "friend with benefits" and you see him as an unlabeled relationship.

My advice is to sit down with him, tell him how you've been feeling and what you want out of your relationship. Then, depending on his answer, proceed however you feel like. But, ultimately, don't let him dictate your happiness the way he does. If he's obviously using you or leading you on, move forward. Find someone who will take true interest in you and being with you.

Best of luck.

(edited 7 years ago)

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Original post by phunky_fresh

I think you need to discuss it with him. I can guess why he may be acting this way, however only he will be able to verify. Ask him if everything is OK with you two and take it from there.

Thanks for the advice. I will try talk to him.....that's if he replies 😒 Just out of curiosity what are your opinions on why he's acting like this.

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

Original post by Withengar

My suggestion - define the relationship.

You will not get any desirable results (not often at least) from a person with whom you're in an unlabeled relationship. They have no obligation to you besides what their needs and wishes dictate. The can just as easily talk to you daily as they can not text you for days or even weeks. You can't except people you want to be treated if you don't sit down and discuss exactly what you want and how you want it.

Your interaction seems to be a very unhealthy relationship, as going that far without defining anything often leads to someone being hurt - in this case you. It is quite possible he just sees you as a "hook-up" or a "friend with benefits" and you see him as an unlabeled relationship.

My advice is to sit down with him, tell him how you've been feeling and what you want out of your relationship. Then, depending on his answer, proceed however you feel like. But, ultimately, don't let him dictate your happiness the way he does. If he's obviously using you or leading you on, move forward. Find someone who will take true interest in you and being with you.

Best of luck.

Thank you so much. What you've said makes so much sense. Tbh I think friends with benefits is the perfect way to describe our relationship but he's not the time of guy to just use me. We have a strong connection. It's just this past week that he's been acting strange.