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best way of turning down guys?

I have 3 men that are interested in me, but I have no desire to date them, but i would like to be their friend. I just get so akward about letting them down. What is the best way to deal with this situation?

I dont want to lie and say i have someone else, but i dont want to hurt thier feelings. I have just come out of a difficult relationship and am keen to get back dating, AND making more friends that includes men, because i like male company but some men kinda get the wrong idea.

In the past ive always used the " i just see you as a friend line" or " im not looking for a relationship right now" but i still feel awkward.

oh and back in my teens i used the " im a lesbian" excuse to ward of lecherous men, but that had the opposite effect lol :p:

any ideas?

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Reply 1

username47781

Be honest and tell them you are not interested.

Reply 2

Dionysus

Just tell them the truth - it'll be hard, but they'll accept it.

Reply 3

PhilMc

Swift kick to the....

'I don't like you like that'

Reply 4

ph9

it's quite simple really. you just tell them you're not interested in anything more than a friendship.

Reply 5

pinkchampers

Cage

Just tell them the truth - it'll be hard, but they'll accept it.

that still seems a bit blunt tho!

but maybe that approach is the best way to go.

Reply 6

username47781

Sometimes the only way is to be blunt.

Reply 7

TheRandomer

Yeah just tell them you consider them a good friend, but nothing more.

*sigh* why is it always the ones we don't like back that take an interest?!

Reply 8

Gilliwoo

Say you're not really into relationships right now.

Reply 9

Jossyboy45

My most recent ex girlfriend told me that she doesn't want to get hurt, i.e. she cannot trust me.
The truth hurts, but life is for learning.

Reply 10

ub3r

I always say i have a boyfriend. So yeah, thats the best way.

Reply 11

username47781

Judging by her other post I would say she will turn them down after giving them a little something.

Reply 12

Ross_j

i tell them i have a boyfriend

Reply 13

pinkchampers

Rock Fan

Judging by her other post I would say she will turn them down after giving them a little something.

LOL - depends on what they looked like, and what they were like in bed lol :p:

Reply 14

Dionysus

pinkchampers

that still seems a bit blunt tho!

but maybe that approach is the best way to go.

It's a lot better than knowing you were lied to.

Reply 15

Hedger

You say No, then give him a 2 page essay on why you said no, what's wrong with him and what he can improve on :-P

Reply 16

Sundous

just be straightforward and honest about it and tell them that you're not interested.

Avoid being too nice when it comes to these things, it'll just give hope and that's not fair to them or yourself.

Good luck

Reply 17

Walrus Rider

Drop it in to a conversation about something else.

Like, for example, start talking about how you want a boyfriend and how hard it is to find a guy thats both sexually attractive and nice as a person.
Then say something like 'I mean, take you for example. You're a really nice guy but (no offence) I'm not attracted to you. And then there are other people who are really good looking but are total jerks' (Carry on the conversation as if nothing is amiss).
It's subtle enough to avoid embarassment.