Cant work this girl out
So basically I have been speaking to this girl I met online everyday for about 3 months. In the 3 months I have only seen her twice, 3 times tomorrow.
When I ask her about meeting up she always said she was busy or wants to wait until she is less stressed about work etc... First time I saw her was fine, loved it. no kisses just a hug on the first day... never even said the word date or anything , but I assumed it was classed as one haha.
Then we spoke everyday about random crap really, and 2 weeks later I saw her again and she is nice and I really like her but I cant work out if she likes likes me. She is always speaking everyday on text, surely if she didn't she would just ignore me?? Well anyway, after the second date all I got was a kiss on the cheek and tomorrow will be the first time I see her for about 1 and a half months!!
I feel now I was trying to build the chemistry and the 3rd date would be a proper kiss etc, but now its like starting from the beginning??
What should I do, and how do I approach the "day out" tomorrow, also in 3 months she has never mentioned anything sexual and neither have I as I dont feel she is interested or that kind of girl, but obviously I want there to be sexual relations or whats the point...
Any way I can initiate or have any ideas on what to do when meeting her and what to do in this so called relationship, I dont know how to ask her out and if she even wants that, for all I know she might just think of me as a friend and I have wasted my time!!
Cheers guys haha
When I ask her about meeting up she always said she was busy or wants to wait until she is less stressed about work etc... First time I saw her was fine, loved it. no kisses just a hug on the first day... never even said the word date or anything , but I assumed it was classed as one haha.
Then we spoke everyday about random crap really, and 2 weeks later I saw her again and she is nice and I really like her but I cant work out if she likes likes me. She is always speaking everyday on text, surely if she didn't she would just ignore me?? Well anyway, after the second date all I got was a kiss on the cheek and tomorrow will be the first time I see her for about 1 and a half months!!
I feel now I was trying to build the chemistry and the 3rd date would be a proper kiss etc, but now its like starting from the beginning??
What should I do, and how do I approach the "day out" tomorrow, also in 3 months she has never mentioned anything sexual and neither have I as I dont feel she is interested or that kind of girl, but obviously I want there to be sexual relations or whats the point...
Any way I can initiate or have any ideas on what to do when meeting her and what to do in this so called relationship, I dont know how to ask her out and if she even wants that, for all I know she might just think of me as a friend and I have wasted my time!!
Cheers guys haha
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Sorry but she doesn't like you. She most likely sees you as friend. I talk to people everyday and it never means anything. And a kiss on the cheek means nothing either. You're reading waaay too much into this. If you've been talking for three months and NOTHING has happened, and nothing to give you the idea that she likes you as from what I can tell she doesn't like you then it's a lost cause. If she liked you she would've found a way to see you despite all what's going on. Just because you've been friendly doesn't mean you deserve to receive anything in return. Also to assume that you went on a 'date' when obviously it wasn't that as it would've been stated clearly either before or whilst you were on it. You're making assumptions about how she feels about you and I'm sorry but she doesn't reciprocate those feelings. Also *****y of you to see it as wasting your time with this girl. Like she probably considers you a friend and if you ditched her simply because she doesn't like you romantically is *****y of you.
Original post by richyy95
but obviously I want there to be sexual relations or whats the point...
lol
(edited 6 years ago)
I reaaaally like her, like I have never felt this way before, and enjoy talking to her. I would still speak to her even if things dont work out.
What is hard though is obviously we met on tinder, so she is looking to date right? With a bit of info and knowledge I know she doesnt go out much and she spends most days she is busy with her family.
I have no issue with that it is cute, but maybe she is shy and not very experienced in this and is probably still a virgin, so I am so confuseeeeeeeeeed.
I am not a *****y person I know that, I would never just cut her off hence speaking to her for 3 months now. Still enjoy getting messages from her.
What is hard though is obviously we met on tinder, so she is looking to date right? With a bit of info and knowledge I know she doesnt go out much and she spends most days she is busy with her family.
I have no issue with that it is cute, but maybe she is shy and not very experienced in this and is probably still a virgin, so I am so confuseeeeeeeeeed.
I am not a *****y person I know that, I would never just cut her off hence speaking to her for 3 months now. Still enjoy getting messages from her.
Original post by GUMI
lol
That sounded awful, but I am looking for a girlfriend and to date so it is kind of the goal
Original post by richyy95
I reaaaally like her, like I have never felt this way before, and enjoy talking to her. I would still speak to her even if things dont work out.
What is hard though is obviously we met on tinder, so she is looking to date right? With a bit of info and knowledge I know she doesnt go out much and she spends most days she is busy with her family.
I have no issue with that it is cute, but maybe she is shy and not very experienced in this and is probably still a virgin, so I am so confuseeeeeeeeeed.
I am not a *****y person I know that, I would never just cut her off hence speaking to her for 3 months now. Still enjoy getting messages from her.
What is hard though is obviously we met on tinder, so she is looking to date right? With a bit of info and knowledge I know she doesnt go out much and she spends most days she is busy with her family.
I have no issue with that it is cute, but maybe she is shy and not very experienced in this and is probably still a virgin, so I am so confuseeeeeeeeeed.
I am not a *****y person I know that, I would never just cut her off hence speaking to her for 3 months now. Still enjoy getting messages from her.
If you met on tinder, her being "busy" is probably her excuse for going on dates with other guys. No one is that busy. Sorry mate, your best bet is to do something to make you stand out. Like buy her a car
Original post by ed98
Does she ever initiate the conversation? Or is it mainly you?
Both, she says good morning everyday before I am even awake and that lmao, my mind is a puzzle right now.
What ellisx said.
If she really liked you and there was sexual tension you two would be a lot further down the line by now. It seems as if she see's you as a friend or worse just someone who she can go and have lunch with to kill time and get out a bit. Your mistake was not being direct, as in straight up tell her that you like her, she'll either love you for it (being confident) or never speak to you again (so you know she's not srs).
Make it clear what you want and see what happens, I reckon you two will eventually forget each other and move on.
Alternatively she could be really shy, but I doubt that.
Try and meet girls in real life, online dating sucks for most guys.
If she really liked you and there was sexual tension you two would be a lot further down the line by now. It seems as if she see's you as a friend or worse just someone who she can go and have lunch with to kill time and get out a bit. Your mistake was not being direct, as in straight up tell her that you like her, she'll either love you for it (being confident) or never speak to you again (so you know she's not srs).
Make it clear what you want and see what happens, I reckon you two will eventually forget each other and move on.
Alternatively she could be really shy, but I doubt that.
Try and meet girls in real life, online dating sucks for most guys.
Original post by GUMI
If you met on tinder, her being "busy" is probably her excuse for going on dates with other guys. No one is that busy. Sorry mate, your best bet is to do something to make you stand out. Like buy her a car
She isnt, I know because of snapchat and she tells me like her whole day plan ffs, sounds like I am obsessed but with all social media now everyone knows everything...
I agree with what ellisx - she's not into you like that. It seems to me she likes you as a friend, but I suppose you could always come out and ask her how she's feeling towards you so you know for sure? However she feels, you'll find out and won't have to keep wondering about it. I can't say I appreciate it when guys think that because a girl only likes them as a friend they've 'wasted their time' with them...don't you like having her as a friend..? Idk. Anyway, if you want to know for sure, ask her, but I don't think she likes you in that way otherwise she'd be doing more tbh
Original post by richyy95
She isnt, I know because of snapchat and she tells me like her whole day plan ffs, sounds like I am obsessed but with all social media now everyone knows everything...
Nah thats fine, but texts and snaps could be misleading. Just take everything you see on social media with a grain of salt
How I see it is she may just genuinely be a busy person? I wouldn't say anything has completely ruled out a more romantic relationship, but she may just not have the time to pursue things? But even if she doesn't see you romantically, you've still gained a friend, and friendship in the long-term can be more rewarding.
Imo I would just ask her where things stand. (As someone who thought they were on a date with someone and then found out later from a friend of a friend that they didn't consider it one, it's much easier to just talk openly. 😂)
I think the good morning texts are a hopeful sign tho - I don't think anyone sends those unless it's a v close friend or a romantic interest?
Also tinder is a weird place. Most of my female friends who have had it weren't that serious about meeting people, but just really enjoyed chatting and the drama of the swipe 😂
I can see why you can't work it out, there isn't really enough info to be sure of where you stand. Best of luck to you 👍 ((just ask her))
- A bi girl who has witnessed a lot of strange tinder relationships and shenanigans
Imo I would just ask her where things stand. (As someone who thought they were on a date with someone and then found out later from a friend of a friend that they didn't consider it one, it's much easier to just talk openly. 😂)
I think the good morning texts are a hopeful sign tho - I don't think anyone sends those unless it's a v close friend or a romantic interest?
Also tinder is a weird place. Most of my female friends who have had it weren't that serious about meeting people, but just really enjoyed chatting and the drama of the swipe 😂
I can see why you can't work it out, there isn't really enough info to be sure of where you stand. Best of luck to you 👍 ((just ask her))
- A bi girl who has witnessed a lot of strange tinder relationships and shenanigans
I tried to reply but my post got deleted lol so this may come out kinda brief / blunt
1) she may be genuinely busy, and was optimistic joining tinder that she'd have the time to date
2) she may see you as a friend - but friendship can be more rewarding long term so it's not that bad?
3) she may not be serious about pursuing a relationship in general.
I'd say the good morning texts are a hopeful sign as I don't think anyone sends those to ppl that aren't close friends or romantic interests?
Also tinder is a weird place. Most of my female friends who have it aren't serious about meeting people but enjoy chatting and the drama of the swipe.
From what you've said you can't really infer much about how she feels other than she enjoys taking to you.
Therefore, just ask? Clear communication is best for relationships, so just ask. (As someone who thought they went on a date and later found out from a friend of a friend it was a misunderstanding it's best to just have everything in the open!)
Best of luck to you 👍
- A bi girl who has witnessed a lot of strange tinder shenanigans and relationships
1) she may be genuinely busy, and was optimistic joining tinder that she'd have the time to date
2) she may see you as a friend - but friendship can be more rewarding long term so it's not that bad?
3) she may not be serious about pursuing a relationship in general.
I'd say the good morning texts are a hopeful sign as I don't think anyone sends those to ppl that aren't close friends or romantic interests?
Also tinder is a weird place. Most of my female friends who have it aren't serious about meeting people but enjoy chatting and the drama of the swipe.
From what you've said you can't really infer much about how she feels other than she enjoys taking to you.
Therefore, just ask? Clear communication is best for relationships, so just ask. (As someone who thought they went on a date and later found out from a friend of a friend it was a misunderstanding it's best to just have everything in the open!)
Best of luck to you 👍
- A bi girl who has witnessed a lot of strange tinder shenanigans and relationships
Haha this girl sounds like me, I couldn't tell you if she likes you or not but she's probably quite shy and as you said inexperienced. Try taking things slow and see how it goes some people take longer to warm up to people than others. If you want a relationship with her I'm going to say you'd need to be patient.
Posted from TSR Mobile
Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by Anonymous
I tried to reply but my post got deleted lol so this may come out kinda brief / blunt
1) she may be genuinely busy, and was optimistic joining tinder that she'd have the time to date
2) she may see you as a friend - but friendship can be more rewarding long term so it's not that bad?
3) she may not be serious about pursuing a relationship in general.
I'd say the good morning texts are a hopeful sign as I don't think anyone sends those to ppl that aren't close friends or romantic interests?
Also tinder is a weird place. Most of my female friends who have it aren't serious about meeting people but enjoy chatting and the drama of the swipe.
From what you've said you can't really infer much about how she feels other than she enjoys taking to you.
Therefore, just ask? Clear communication is best for relationships, so just ask. (As someone who thought they went on a date and later found out from a friend of a friend it was a misunderstanding it's best to just have everything in the open!)
Best of luck to you 👍
- A bi girl who has witnessed a lot of strange tinder shenanigans and relationships
1) she may be genuinely busy, and was optimistic joining tinder that she'd have the time to date
2) she may see you as a friend - but friendship can be more rewarding long term so it's not that bad?
3) she may not be serious about pursuing a relationship in general.
I'd say the good morning texts are a hopeful sign as I don't think anyone sends those to ppl that aren't close friends or romantic interests?
Also tinder is a weird place. Most of my female friends who have it aren't serious about meeting people but enjoy chatting and the drama of the swipe.
From what you've said you can't really infer much about how she feels other than she enjoys taking to you.
Therefore, just ask? Clear communication is best for relationships, so just ask. (As someone who thought they went on a date and later found out from a friend of a friend it was a misunderstanding it's best to just have everything in the open!)
Best of luck to you 👍
- A bi girl who has witnessed a lot of strange tinder shenanigans and relationships
Haha, yeh I need to know where the relationship stands but I am ultimately also cool with being good friends, I mean she is a super chill girl and shares similar interests so why not. Obviously I like her enough to be in a relationship but cannot force her to be in one, either way as long as I can see her and hang out that makes me happy.
You are right, tinder sucks but is also how I met a few dates and nice people, but most are just on it for "banter" as they always say which pisses me off a bit if I am trying to take it seriously lol.
Cheers for your reply, appreciate it!!!
Original post by Hollyht
Haha this girl sounds like me, I couldn't tell you if she likes you or not but she's probably quite shy and as you said inexperienced. Try taking things slow and see how it goes some people take longer to warm up to people than others. If you want a relationship with her I'm going to say you'd need to be patient.
Posted from TSR Mobile
Posted from TSR Mobile
Went on 3rd "date" today and she seemed extra confident, spoke way more and was so nice, even she was the one that said lets see each other more often etc, normally I had to say it all the time
Original post by richyy95
Went on 3rd "date" today and she seemed extra confident, spoke way more and was so nice, even she was the one that said lets see each other more often etc, normally I had to say it all the time
Well, seems like she proved some of us wrong. Keep it up bro and go get dat pussy.
Well it went really well but i am so awkward with goodbyes. Literally the day was chilled, we spoke for hours and I was planning to say "I had a great time etc" and lean in for a kiss... buuuuut nooo, I said yh yb it was fun and she said lets do something soon and I gave her this weird hug and mumbled some **** then she went in the house. I mean wtf am I doing!
Hopefully she isnt put off and will still see me.
Now I am on holiday and wont be able to see her for 2 weeks... how do I kiss her next time and would she even want one argggg. Also planning to ask her out next date.
Im so scatty and stupid sometimes haha
Hopefully she isnt put off and will still see me.
Now I am on holiday and wont be able to see her for 2 weeks... how do I kiss her next time and would she even want one argggg. Also planning to ask her out next date.
Im so scatty and stupid sometimes haha
Ok update:
I have seen her 5 times and plan to see her on Sat or Sun, for the 6th time... Last time was fun, went out and had food etc, still no kiss and still not asked her anything. She is still talking to me everyday and is up for seeing me when she is free which is hard.
All I think about is her and I want to kiss her, but I am scared she considers us as just friends and thats she doesnt even know we have been "dating".
I need some tips on how to be flirty, increase how often I touch her and how to make the move. 5 times in a row it has been me dropping her off at her house, giving an awkward hug and a peck on the cheek, how do I randomly stop talking and begin to kiss. What if she moves away and I never see her again??
I have seen her 5 times and plan to see her on Sat or Sun, for the 6th time... Last time was fun, went out and had food etc, still no kiss and still not asked her anything. She is still talking to me everyday and is up for seeing me when she is free which is hard.
All I think about is her and I want to kiss her, but I am scared she considers us as just friends and thats she doesnt even know we have been "dating".
I need some tips on how to be flirty, increase how often I touch her and how to make the move. 5 times in a row it has been me dropping her off at her house, giving an awkward hug and a peck on the cheek, how do I randomly stop talking and begin to kiss. What if she moves away and I never see her again??
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