Girls holding eye contact in the club, do they like me or?
I'm fairly new to the club scene, and being around people that are drunk in general, so I'm not overly in the know of how people are or react to stuff. I noticed last night there was a few girls happened to be looking at me and sometimes me looking at them first and they'd keep the eye contact for a good few seconds, I think the odd one was quite clear with interest in me, the others i couldn't tell if they were looking at me because they thought i was weird or for what ever reason. I mean one girl kind of smiled a bit and then went over to her friend just next to her, I honestly couldn't tell if that was a 'go to her' or she was mocking me or something.
I'm not weird looking, people who have commented on my looks say good looking or quite attractive, no great looking..7/10 at best I'd say.
Girls if you keep eye contact with a guy at the club are you signalling interest or do is it because you think he was looking at you? This can be either from a distance or up close.
I mean surely if you don't want a guy to come up to you... you wouldn't look at him right? You'd turn your back or roll your eyes.
I'm not weird looking, people who have commented on my looks say good looking or quite attractive, no great looking..7/10 at best I'd say.
Girls if you keep eye contact with a guy at the club are you signalling interest or do is it because you think he was looking at you? This can be either from a distance or up close.
I mean surely if you don't want a guy to come up to you... you wouldn't look at him right? You'd turn your back or roll your eyes.
Yes, 99% guaranteed. But if she just accidentally catches your eyes and quickly looks away, no.
If she smiles it's 100%.
Here's another certainty, if she leaves her friends to come somewhere with you without telling them or ensuring she knows where they will be, she is willing to go home with you that night.
Women strongly avoid making eye contact with guys they don't like (unless it happens by accident, then they will swiftly look away if uninterested).
Once in conversation it's a bit different. I've always felt like if they will legit just LOCK eyes with you then yes. To me it's always seemed relatively blatant. Some girl here earlier said women just act polite anyway, so I may be wrong - but personally I've found every uninterested girl will either blank, look for a way out, signal her friends to rescue her, or talk back in a dull way without any hint of excitement.
If she smiles it's 100%.
Here's another certainty, if she leaves her friends to come somewhere with you without telling them or ensuring she knows where they will be, she is willing to go home with you that night.
Women strongly avoid making eye contact with guys they don't like (unless it happens by accident, then they will swiftly look away if uninterested).
Once in conversation it's a bit different. I've always felt like if they will legit just LOCK eyes with you then yes. To me it's always seemed relatively blatant. Some girl here earlier said women just act polite anyway, so I may be wrong - but personally I've found every uninterested girl will either blank, look for a way out, signal her friends to rescue her, or talk back in a dull way without any hint of excitement.
(edited 6 years ago)
yah am a girl and i'd say eye contact means she is interested
Original post by raspberr1es
yah am a girl and i'd say eye contact means she is interested
If it's a quick glance it doesn't count though right. That night they weren't quick glances. In the past I will sometimes get the quick look which as rocky said likely isn't anything substantial.
Original post by raspberr1es
yah am a girl and i'd say eye contact means she is interested
Can you elaborate on signs of interest you can pick up on once in conversation?
I mean there's the blatant stuff like giggling constantly, touching you, but literally nobody is going to miss that lol you'd have to be vegetated like Jack Nicholson at the end of One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest.
You got any examples of subtler stuff?
I've always felt that the following shows interest:
If they seem enthusiastic while talking, are smiley, hold eye contact strongly, linger on holding your hand when you introduce yourself, (possibly) if they offer you to hang with them, if they're comfortable with you - say - holding your hand on her arm while talking (particularly if she holds eye contact at the same time), attempting to carry the conversation if you fall silent.
(edited 6 years ago)
Original post by RockyDennis
Yes, 99% guaranteed. But if she just accidentally catches your eyes and quickly looks away, no.
I wouldn't even rule that one out. Sometimes I'll look at a guy I'm interested in and then if I get caught looking and I'm feeling nervous or don't want to look too keen I'll look away quickly. Don't want to get caught staring. I don't know about other girls but I give such mixed signals sometimes. I feel like I spend the majority of the time trying to appear like I'm not interested. Not sure why. Or sometimes I'll kind of ending up giving guys death stares with a proper b*tch face which probably also signals disinterest.
So basically if I'm walking down the street/see you in the club and I think you're hot, I'm either going to a) not look at all and pretend I don't notice you. b) look at you but kind of nonchalantly. c) look at you with my resting b*tch face. e) look and then look away. d) my favourite and I'll properly eye f*ck you.
Generally though if I'm staring or looking a few times it's because I think they're attractive or intriguing. Occasionally I'll do it to guys I don't find attractive but that's probably more of an ego thing and me just wanting to intimidate people for the sake of it.
I know someone who married a guy she met at a club in London. I asked how they met in the club and she said she winked at him! So.... if a girl winks at you!!!!
Original post by Anonymous
I'm fairly new to the club scene, and being around people that are drunk in general, so I'm not overly in the know of how people are or react to stuff. I noticed last night there was a few girls happened to be looking at me and sometimes me looking at them first and they'd keep the eye contact for a good few seconds, I think the odd one was quite clear with interest in me, the others i couldn't tell if they were looking at me because they thought i was weird or for what ever reason. I mean one girl kind of smiled a bit and then went over to her friend just next to her, I honestly couldn't tell if that was a 'go to her' or she was mocking me or something.
I'm not weird looking, people who have commented on my looks say good looking or quite attractive, no great looking..7/10 at best I'd say.
Girls if you keep eye contact with a guy at the club are you signalling interest or do is it because you think he was looking at you? This can be either from a distance or up close.
I mean surely if you don't want a guy to come up to you... you wouldn't look at him right? You'd turn your back or roll your eyes.
I'm not weird looking, people who have commented on my looks say good looking or quite attractive, no great looking..7/10 at best I'd say.
Girls if you keep eye contact with a guy at the club are you signalling interest or do is it because you think he was looking at you? This can be either from a distance or up close.
I mean surely if you don't want a guy to come up to you... you wouldn't look at him right? You'd turn your back or roll your eyes.
Original post by RockyDennis
Yes, 99% guaranteed. But if she just accidentally catches your eyes and quickly looks away, no.
If she smiles it's 100%.
Here's another certainty, if she leaves her friends to come somewhere with you without telling them or ensuring she knows where they will be, she is willing to go home with you that night.
Women strongly avoid making eye contact with guys they don't like (unless it happens by accident, then they will swiftly look away if uninterested).
Once in conversation it's a bit different. I've always felt like if they will legit just LOCK eyes with you then yes. To me it's always seemed relatively blatant. Some girl here earlier said women just act polite anyway, so I may be wrong - but personally I've found every uninterested girl will either blank, look for a way out, signal her friends to rescue her, or talk back in a dull way without any hint of excitement.
If she smiles it's 100%.
Here's another certainty, if she leaves her friends to come somewhere with you without telling them or ensuring she knows where they will be, she is willing to go home with you that night.
Women strongly avoid making eye contact with guys they don't like (unless it happens by accident, then they will swiftly look away if uninterested).
Once in conversation it's a bit different. I've always felt like if they will legit just LOCK eyes with you then yes. To me it's always seemed relatively blatant. Some girl here earlier said women just act polite anyway, so I may be wrong - but personally I've found every uninterested girl will either blank, look for a way out, signal her friends to rescue her, or talk back in a dull way without any hint of excitement.
There's been several times i've had eye contact from girls in clubs, decided to approach them and they've not seemed receptive ...which puzzled me tbh and had me questioning weather I imagined the "eye contact"
but then there has been several times as well that girls have smiled at me [and I know I didn't imagine that] ...and when i've gone over to talk to them they've not been receptive. In the past though I never used to get smiled at in clubs.... it only happened after I improved my appearance somewhat, Honestly I would say that if a girl smiles at me in a club only about 1 in 3 or 1 in 4 turn out to be receptive if i approach. There's even been 1 or two occasions where girls with BOYFRIENDS have smiled at me whilst he was not looking wtf?
I have come to the conclusion that a smile probably means they find you attractive, but does not necessarily mean they are looking to hook up with you.
In one night 3 girls smiled at me unsolicited, I approached two of them and they were not receptive..., a third girl later smiled at me ...and I was that annoyed that I didn't bother to approach her.
Seriously ladies, if you're not wanting to progress things with a guy in a bar/club don't go smiling at him unsolicited. I can't be arsed with games......
I find a girl actually coming up to you a more reliable signal than a smile
(edited 6 years ago)
And just because someone looks at you and makes eye contact it doesnt mean attraction. They're just looking around, like everyone else and yourself do all of the time. If they shut you down, oh well, if they dont, yes lad. If you assume attraction is already there you're likely to get screwed over, assume they've noticed you and that you now need to do something to get their attention if you want it.
Original post by ANM775
There's been several times i've had eye contact from girls in clubs, decided to approach them and they've not seemed receptive ...which puzzled me tbh and had me questioning weather I imagined the "eye contact"
but then there has been several times as well that girls have smiled at me [and I know I didn't imagine that] ...and when i've gone over to talk to them they've not been receptive. In the past though I never used to get smiled at in clubs.... it only happened after I improved my appearance somewhat, Honestly I would say that if a girl smiles at me in a club only about 1 in 3 or 1 in 4 turn out to be receptive if i approach. There's even been 1 or two occasions where girls with BOYFRIENDS have smiled at me whilst he was not looking wtf?
I have come to the conclusion that a smile probably means they find you attractive, but does not necessarily mean they are looking to hook up with you.
In one night 3 girls smiled at me unsolicited, I approached two of them and they were not receptive..., a third girl later smiled at me ...and I was that annoyed that I didn't bother to approach her.
Seriously ladies, if you're not wanting to progress things with a guy in a bar/club don't go smiling at him unsolicited. I can't be arsed with games......
I find a girl actually coming up to you a more reliable signal than a smile
but then there has been several times as well that girls have smiled at me [and I know I didn't imagine that] ...and when i've gone over to talk to them they've not been receptive. In the past though I never used to get smiled at in clubs.... it only happened after I improved my appearance somewhat, Honestly I would say that if a girl smiles at me in a club only about 1 in 3 or 1 in 4 turn out to be receptive if i approach. There's even been 1 or two occasions where girls with BOYFRIENDS have smiled at me whilst he was not looking wtf?
I have come to the conclusion that a smile probably means they find you attractive, but does not necessarily mean they are looking to hook up with you.
In one night 3 girls smiled at me unsolicited, I approached two of them and they were not receptive..., a third girl later smiled at me ...and I was that annoyed that I didn't bother to approach her.
Seriously ladies, if you're not wanting to progress things with a guy in a bar/club don't go smiling at him unsolicited. I can't be arsed with games......
I find a girl actually coming up to you a more reliable signal than a smile
Looool, you're obv doing something severely wrong lol. 1 in 4 are you joking? For me it's 4 in 4. What do you mean by not receptive exactly, maybe your chat is bad... If she does it twice especially, there is NO mistake in what she's doing. I can guarantee you.
Smiling at someone like that from across the room/dance floor or w.e. is literally code for "I like you". No girl will hold eye contact and smile unless they like you - and never twice in a row (if it's fleeting it might be meaningless, if she holds it for a few seconds it's not).
Also 90% of girls with boyfriends are willing to cheat at nightclubs. If anything, her friend will stop her from doing it (rare - usually they will allow her to cheat, so again I usually take it that the friend just doesn't approve of me). If a girl says she has a boyfriend I just take that as "I'm not into you" even if it's true. Seriously not joking, I bet loads of girls will deny this too, but probably 3 quarters of girls I slept with (one night stand) I found out later were already seeing someone... If she's literally there with her boyfriend then she probably isn't going to go through with it but the meaning is the same.
Original post by NONAMEBRO
And just because someone looks at you and makes eye contact it doesnt mean attraction. They're just looking around, like everyone else and yourself do all of the time. If they shut you down, oh well, if they dont, yes lad. If you assume attraction is already there you're likely to get screwed over, assume they've noticed you and that you now need to do something to get their attention if you want it.
If they hold it then yes it does lol, at least 90% of the time. Just smile to confirm, if they return it then more like 99%, and if they do it twice it's 100%. You can kinda tell though if it's fleeting, like if she's just quickly glancing and looking away or just shoots a millisecond smile and looks away bored. If she holds it there's no way on Earth she's not attracted to you lol. She'd have to be very weird like I've never known ANYONE who reacts that way.
I guess there are some situations where she would feel obligated to react that way. But not on the dance floor or bar or whatever. If a girl isn't into you she will do absolutely everything in her power to avoid even catching your gaze. If you're close to her and try to make eye contact, she will just pretend not to notice. This bothers me a lot. It's also possible she legitimately can't see that you're making eyes with her (rare, women have excellent peripheral vision) and will finally notice then accidentally catch your eye but quickly look away if uninterested.
Original post by RockyDennis
Looool, you're obv doing something severely wrong lol. 1 in 4 are you joking? For me it's 4 in 4. What do you mean by not receptive exactly, maybe your chat is bad... If she does it twice especially, there is NO mistake in what she's doing. I can guarantee you.
Honestly, I literally get there and say hi or something and I can tell just tell from their body language and enthusiasm in their voice they're not looking for anything to happen. I call this being unreceptive.
I don't think i've done anything wrong yet if i've just walked up and said hi
I remember once when this happened I started walking away and a friend I was with encouraged me to go back and try again. The girl soon started saying "BYE .................BYE" implying the interaction was done and for me to leave
I usually don't stick around long or plow once I notice they are unreceptive. I'll just eject.....
judging by her response when I went back, I shouldn't have gone back lol
I get many false alarms with girls smiling at me in these venue's.
I will say only 1 in 3 or 1 in 4 who smile at me are actually receptive once I get there.
more reliable I find is when a girl approaches me unsolicited.
Some girl came up to me when i was sitting down on my phone, we chatted about music for a minute and then she asked for my number. And i found her facebook as she had a boyfriend... girls with boyfriends who go clubbing... i agree 9/10 they are willing to cheat if they find someone good enough/better. This girl who came up to me wasn't great lol so...
Original post by ANM775
Honestly, I literally get there and say hi or something and I can tell just tell from their body language and enthusiasm in their voice they're not looking for anything to happen. I call this being unreceptive.
I don't think i've done anything wrong yet if i've just walked up and said hi
I remember once when this happened I started walking away and a friend I was with encouraged me to go back and try again. The girl soon started saying "BYE .................BYE" implying the interaction was done and for me to leave
I usually don't stick around long or plow once I notice they are unreceptive. I'll just eject.....
judging by her response when I went back, I shouldn't have gone back lol
I get many false alarms with girls smiling at me in these venue's.
I will say only 1 in 3 or 1 in 4 who smile at me are actually receptive once I get there.
more reliable I find is when a girl approaches me unsolicited.
I don't think i've done anything wrong yet if i've just walked up and said hi
I remember once when this happened I started walking away and a friend I was with encouraged me to go back and try again. The girl soon started saying "BYE .................BYE" implying the interaction was done and for me to leave
I usually don't stick around long or plow once I notice they are unreceptive. I'll just eject.....
judging by her response when I went back, I shouldn't have gone back lol
I get many false alarms with girls smiling at me in these venue's.
I will say only 1 in 3 or 1 in 4 who smile at me are actually receptive once I get there.
more reliable I find is when a girl approaches me unsolicited.
Well there's obviously something not quite right here, lmao. You're saying you catch each other's eye, she holds your gaze, then smiles while continuing to hold your eye contact - then 75% of them reject you when you say hi? Lmfaoooo.
There's just no way. You must be misinterpreting something or sounding really unconfident/dull or god knows, but this scenario makes legitimately no sense unless they're purposefully ****ing with you. If they're just flashing a quick smile then looking away that's likely just courteous. If they're holding it for longer than is normal, that's a universally accepted signal they want you to talk to them - they know exactly what it means and so does everyone else.
What happens if you look away for a couple of seconds then look back?
(edited 6 years ago)
Original post by RockyDennis
Well there's obviously something not quite right here, lmao. You're saying you catch each other's eye, she holds your gaze, then smiles while continuing to hold your eye contact - then 75% of them reject you when you say hi? Lmfaoooo.
There's just no way. You must be misinterpreting something or sounding really unconfident/dull or god knows, but this scenario makes legitimately no sense unless they're purposefully ****ing with you. If they're just flashing a quick smile then looking away that's likely just courteous. If they're holding it for longer than is normal, that's a universally accepted signal they want you to talk to them - they know exactly what it means and so does everyone else.
What happens if you look away for a couple of seconds then look back?
There's just no way. You must be misinterpreting something or sounding really unconfident/dull or god knows, but this scenario makes legitimately no sense unless they're purposefully ****ing with you. If they're just flashing a quick smile then looking away that's likely just courteous. If they're holding it for longer than is normal, that's a universally accepted signal they want you to talk to them - they know exactly what it means and so does everyone else.
What happens if you look away for a couple of seconds then look back?
The times it has happened, they've looked at me and smiled and pretty soon after that I approached them [I did not wait to see if they would smile again]
perhaps it was courteous smiling... but before hitting the gym i never used to get any smiling ..so i'm inclined to think otherwise.
tbh I think I might have accidently exaggerated somewhat and mixed up times I approached and they smiled, and times I approached with just eye contact
I can only remember 4 specific times, when the girl smiled and I ALSO went over to her and 2 out of 4 of those times they were unreceptive
I think the eye contact thing was more like 1 in 4, ...although tbh eye contact is a lot easier to misinterpet
What do you guys recommend saying to a girls when you approach after she gives you the signs??? I’m so bad with this and overly think hard about what to say to 100% get her interest? Do silly pick up lines even work? Or is saying “hi what’s your name?” enough? Or just a random question to her? What has worked for you guys and what hasn’t when speaking to girls at clubs?
Original post by ANM775
The times it has happened, they've looked at me and smiled and pretty soon after that I approached them [I did not wait to see if they would smile again]
perhaps it was courteous smiling... but before hitting the gym i never used to get any smiling ..so i'm inclined to think otherwise.
tbh I think I might have accidently exaggerated somewhat and mixed up times I approached and they smiled, and times I approached with just eye contact
I can only remember 4 specific times, when the girl smiled and I ALSO went over to her and 2 out of 4 of those times they were unreceptive
I think the eye contact thing was more like 1 in 4, ...although tbh eye contact is a lot easier to misinterpet
perhaps it was courteous smiling... but before hitting the gym i never used to get any smiling ..so i'm inclined to think otherwise.
tbh I think I might have accidently exaggerated somewhat and mixed up times I approached and they smiled, and times I approached with just eye contact
I can only remember 4 specific times, when the girl smiled and I ALSO went over to her and 2 out of 4 of those times they were unreceptive
I think the eye contact thing was more like 1 in 4, ...although tbh eye contact is a lot easier to misinterpet
Well I don't doubt you are probably physically attractive - but it's prolonged or repeated eye contact and smiling that's a "come talk to me" signal. Anything fleeting I just take as accidental, or if she smiles quickly and looks away right away I might even think she's uninterested... But if like, she looks and just holds my gaze for a bit too long and then smiles while continuing to hold eye contact, I know with certainty she's signalling me to talk to her.
If she doesn't smile herself I'll do basically the same thing in reverse and smile while continuing to hold her gaze, and then see if she returns it and holds eye contact. No girl would do this accidentally, since everyone knows the implication. So if they do this and then immediately reject you they're either very weird or evil and purposefully ****ing with you for a laugh.
It makes me a bit nervous but after a few vodkas it's alright.
Original post by Anonymous
What do you guys recommend saying to a girls when you approach after she gives you the signs??? I’m so bad with this and overly think hard about what to say to 100% get her interest? Do silly pick up lines even work? Or is saying “hi what’s your name?” enough? Or just a random question to her? What has worked for you guys and what hasn’t when speaking to girls at clubs?
You don't need a pickup line. If she does what I said above she's already interested in you. Just be like "hey how are you?" and she'll be like "good, you?" etc. Any crowded environment (e.g. crowded dance floor, crowded bar), when she comes in to talk to you, put your hand on her arm or shoulder and just hold it there while talking and hold eye contact like nothing's happening - if she seemed receptive before you spoke like holding eye contact, smiling, she will always be comfortable with this. You can be physical quickly in these environments.
Another trick if you're less certain, when you take her hand gently during introductions, just let it linger for a bit too long, see if she's comfortable with this. If she's not interested it will make her uncomfortable. And hold eye contact while doing this and carry on talking like nothing's happening. This is the easiest thing to do btw and is almost foolproof.
Just chat for a little bit, random **** like where she's from etc - you'll probably be in very close to each other if it's crowded. When you want to kiss her, put your hand somewhat gently up on her neck or cheek area. She should usually move in even closer so you can go for it. Almost all women like it best when you put your hand on their face/neck. Very rarely they prefer you to hold their ass.
See if you can get her alone after a little while, ask her to come to the bar with you. Just so you know, if a girl leaves her friends to come somewhere with you without telling them where she's going/asking them to wait there, she's DTF.
Personally I'm not interested in anyone in a club because they're a stranger and I don't know them! So even if I do accidentally hold eye contact, it doesn't necessarily mean anything. They might be good looking but I wouldn't go anywhere with them or be interested beyond thinking 'they're good looking'. That's obviously not the same for all girls though!
My advice is if you see someone you like, go and talk to them. You could waste a whole night questioning the meaning of some strangers eye contact. If they're not interested then move on but if they're chatty and hang around you all night then ask for their number
My advice is if you see someone you like, go and talk to them. You could waste a whole night questioning the meaning of some strangers eye contact. If they're not interested then move on but if they're chatty and hang around you all night then ask for their number
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