Is it normal to have no friends from high school left? Going to uni soon
For context, All through high school I had 2 close friends (we were a group of 3) but recently I fell out with them and the friendship is over, it just fizzled away. In sixth form I made one of the bestest friendships I’d ever had with a girl but we went travelling together and she ended our friendship after as we didn’t get along on that trip at all. I’m now on speaking terms with maybe 2 girls from high school but I wouldn’t say we’re close and they have their own group which they’ve had all through school. I have 2 friends left from primary school but basically no one from high school/sixth form.
I’m going to uni soon which is great to make new friends, however I’m realising I don’t have any friends from home left. I heard that uni holidays are really long and it’s making me feel so isolated that I won’t have people to see when I come back. I kinda put all my eggs in one basket particularly with the one girl who ended our friendship. Everyone meets up with their home friends during uni but I just don’t have that. I’m embarrassed and ashamed when people know I don’t speak to those who were all closest to me. I have my 2 friends from primary school but none from teenage years.
I’m going to uni soon which is great to make new friends, however I’m realising I don’t have any friends from home left. I heard that uni holidays are really long and it’s making me feel so isolated that I won’t have people to see when I come back. I kinda put all my eggs in one basket particularly with the one girl who ended our friendship. Everyone meets up with their home friends during uni but I just don’t have that. I’m embarrassed and ashamed when people know I don’t speak to those who were all closest to me. I have my 2 friends from primary school but none from teenage years.
Just shrug - people are fickle and fall out for all sorts of things. Plus the 'gene' pool at school is tiny compared to Uni and the World as a whole. Unless you are one of the popular 'it crowd' may be you don't find others you really want to spend time with. Hold those two or three friends who you get on with close to your heart. If you have said or done anything that would have been offensive to have caused a split then apologise but otherwise let it all go. I wouldn't worry about missing those old friends, and no one says you have to go home and stay there in the holidays. Friendships need nurturing and the needs of others will come or go but time apart should not weaken those bonds.
The wide and varied scope of people at Uni mean you will meet new students from all walks of life and make new friends. There will also be students who have no family to go back home to and would welcome company over the big term breaks. There will be others who just like you have no real contact with old school friends. Plus there are often chances to work, to holiday and to explore the world with your new found friends. This is a new start and a new experience. Steady away and just take a day, a week at a time.
The wide and varied scope of people at Uni mean you will meet new students from all walks of life and make new friends. There will also be students who have no family to go back home to and would welcome company over the big term breaks. There will be others who just like you have no real contact with old school friends. Plus there are often chances to work, to holiday and to explore the world with your new found friends. This is a new start and a new experience. Steady away and just take a day, a week at a time.
Wel, it happens. I was really close with 4 other people from my sixth form and we had this solid friendship group for a while. Sadly, one of them left the group over a petty matter halfway through year 13, another one has just been drifting away since he got to uni and we cannot get hold of him anymore. Another of my sixth form friends is also slowly drifting away because life's taken him through a much busier path and has somewhat forced him to grow up much faster. He makes an effort to see and message me when he gets the chance, which is mighty nice of him, but the friendship sadly isn't what it was before. Out of a total of 4 good friends, I'm really now left with one and a half now. I sometimes speak with some of my debating club mates, which is always nice but we were really joined by the debate club and without that to hold us together, we all have largely friendly split up and gone our separate ways.
Beyond this, I have a long long trail of people and friends that fell by the wayside through the years. I'm not in regular contact with anybody from before sixth form, only sporadic contact with a few friends who are regrettably a thousand or two miles away (were it not for this, I'm sure we'd be more in touch). While my life hasn't particularly helped in keeping in touch with people, I do think that it's largely the nature of school friendships to come and go. If you think any of your old school friendships are worth salvaging, you can always try to reach out to them and see what happens. If nothing happens, that's OK - that's life for you. As long as you make new friends wherever you go, you'll be alright
Trust me on this, I know from (repeated) personal experience. People come and they go, but the good memories remain and it's always easy to make new good memories with new people.
Beyond this, I have a long long trail of people and friends that fell by the wayside through the years. I'm not in regular contact with anybody from before sixth form, only sporadic contact with a few friends who are regrettably a thousand or two miles away (were it not for this, I'm sure we'd be more in touch). While my life hasn't particularly helped in keeping in touch with people, I do think that it's largely the nature of school friendships to come and go. If you think any of your old school friendships are worth salvaging, you can always try to reach out to them and see what happens. If nothing happens, that's OK - that's life for you. As long as you make new friends wherever you go, you'll be alright
Trust me on this, I know from (repeated) personal experience. People come and they go, but the good memories remain and it's always easy to make new good memories with new people.Original post by Anonymous
For context, All through high school I had 2 close friends (we were a group of 3) but recently I fell out with them and the friendship is over, it just fizzled away. In sixth form I made one of the bestest friendships I’d ever had with a girl but we went travelling together and she ended our friendship after as we didn’t get along on that trip at all. I’m now on speaking terms with maybe 2 girls from high school but I wouldn’t say we’re close and they have their own group which they’ve had all through school. I have 2 friends left from primary school but basically no one from high school/sixth form.
I’m going to uni soon which is great to make new friends, however I’m realising I don’t have any friends from home left. I heard that uni holidays are really long and it’s making me feel so isolated that I won’t have people to see when I come back. I kinda put all my eggs in one basket particularly with the one girl who ended our friendship. Everyone meets up with their home friends during uni but I just don’t have that. I’m embarrassed and ashamed when people know I don’t speak to those who were all closest to me. I have my 2 friends from primary school but none from teenage years.
I’m going to uni soon which is great to make new friends, however I’m realising I don’t have any friends from home left. I heard that uni holidays are really long and it’s making me feel so isolated that I won’t have people to see when I come back. I kinda put all my eggs in one basket particularly with the one girl who ended our friendship. Everyone meets up with their home friends during uni but I just don’t have that. I’m embarrassed and ashamed when people know I don’t speak to those who were all closest to me. I have my 2 friends from primary school but none from teenage years.
I'm in a similar situation too but I'd probably just let it go and move on, it's okay to do things alone when you come back home and you might even enjoy doing things alone (eg. going on a walk, going out alone etc) like you mentioned before, uni is a great opportunity to make friends so try looking forward to that! Although I myself don't have friends I consider close in sixth form, the idea of making new friends in a totally new environment makes me feel a bit optimistic for next year.
That is completely okay. People grow apart. We all have different personalities. And maintaining a friendship depends on the two involved within and what works best.
By the time you have gotten home from uni, you will see classmates about you may not have spoke to much in public, and can always wave and catch up with them when you see them. Similarly, by the time you have been home any bad feelings friends may have towards each other will be fizzled and buried within their new normalities that will be easier to be friendly again, and generally chat.
Some of your uni friends may even visit your hometown with you if you ask them, or you visit theirs for the day.
Please do not be ashamed friendships can corrode.
By the time you have gotten home from uni, you will see classmates about you may not have spoke to much in public, and can always wave and catch up with them when you see them. Similarly, by the time you have been home any bad feelings friends may have towards each other will be fizzled and buried within their new normalities that will be easier to be friendly again, and generally chat.
Some of your uni friends may even visit your hometown with you if you ask them, or you visit theirs for the day.
Please do not be ashamed friendships can corrode.
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