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Feeling bad after sex

I feel terrible after sex. I feet that it’s not a good idea, it’s moving too fast with this guy even though I’ve known him for a tiny little while as a friend (I’d say around a year and a half). I’m feeling uncomfortable around his family (I’m not going to eat with them tonight even though I’ve met them and had dinner with them several times).
As we started having sex, at the end I felt really bad and I just wanted to cry and run away.
I’ve always been the girl that never had sex with anybody (until last year when I had my first bf) and I felt ashamed, and still am because I come from a Christian family. I’ve never had a real relationship with any guy (my ex boyfriend was a narcissist and none of the boys I dated later respected me).

This guy I’ve been having sex with for 2 days has always been there for me, even now when I’m questioning myself about our relationship. He listens to me and comforts me. He’s got a lot that I like but I’m not ready to be in a relationship yet, after all the trauma that I’ve lived with my first ex...
I feel like sex is a normal thing to do but I also feel like if I renounce to this, I’ll have a better life because God created a better one for me if I follow his path.
I feel like I have to make a choice - I cannot be a Christian having sex because it’s not seen well.
Please help!

Reply 1

Anonymous #2

I think you really have to talk to him about how you feel - he might not even be aware of himself? But there's no rush in this maybe tell him you need some time off or something

If he's truly supportive and a listener he'll know better to understand you and your position - hope this resolves well.

Also you might want to realign yourself in a healthy way concerning religion and sex - what's done is done unfortunately, I'm not quite sure how it works but perhaps you can self-reflect on this. It's a learning process we all make mistakes.

Reply 2

1582

Volunteer Team

If it doesn't feel right then simply stop sleeping with him.

Reply 3

Anonymous #3

Hey what's up.

To start, I just want to make it clear that there is nothing wrong with this feeling. For starters, it occurs often after a major step or decision you've taken. Rest assued that this is completely normal, and in fact might happen to most people (myself included).

However, if you're too overwhelmed and it causes symptoms, the reason might be you're simply just not prepared to do so. If your friend (or however their relationship with you is) is understandable, he would slow it down, which is completely normal, and up to your own discretion.

For the most part, it's trauma or just a gutted feeling as you've never done something similar. If you don't feel like doing so, definitely slow it down and tell him to do so too. If you want to talk privately, I'm always available and for the most part, I've helped a lot of people talk about sensitive topics and have helped many of my friends get through confusing times, so don't be afraid to do so.

- Dan