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Overly paranoid, needy and possessive mother

I am 31; i live by myself and a vulnerable disabled man.

My mom is very controlling. She hears about something on the news and she nags. I can’t go on work trips because she thinks I am going to have an accident. I can’t go to the park because I will get mugged. I will get robbed in a very high class city. It’s suffocating.

She has gone ballistic with COVID-19. I don’t want to be reminded of it but i get daily phone calls bugging me with my every move.
It’s worth remembering that she is staunchly Muslim and would not let me move to another city to go to university. Her son my older brother is a control freak and would not let me leave the house without recording my timetable, demanded that I introduce him to my friends, read my text messages and threatened to come out to find me on my nights out.

I stopped speaking to him but ended up with a degree that I hated.

She is very paranoid and at one point thought my next door neighbours were hearing through the wall we had to speak in a quiet section of the house. She would not go to another university because there family was there?

I dont know what to do. She gets very irate when I tell her to stop//

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Reply 1
Original post by Freshprince2424
Lol relax dude. There's people that are dying all around the world and you're worried about a caring albeit nagging mother. Grow up and quit being a baby.


Enough with the tough love.. People post far more trivial stuff on here
I assume you are female. Can't you just move out and live with your friends?
Reply 3
Original post by Mr T 999
I assume you are female. Can't you just move out and live with your friends?


Does my gender matter? And i dont live with her
Reply 4
Original post by Freshprince2424
Tough love is needed. It helps them grow a backbone and man tf up. And you start looking at the positives in life rather than the negatives all the time. Lots of people have lost their mothers over covid and he's here whining about his caring mother. Its not that deep.


I am not a big fan of tough love. It’s just an excuse to be rude to people; kind of like you are being now.
Talk to them about the problems that you have with them.Perhaps they are just worried in their own way.
Show them that you can take responsibility and actually do it.
ASK them:what things do they think that you cant do on your own?Like if they were to abandon this attitude,what do they think can go wrong?
Also,do you think your Mother complained like this when she kept you in her Womb for so many months?
Original post by Anonymous
Does my gender matter? And i dont live with her


Can't you just speak to her and tell her to get off your back?
Reply 7
Original post by Mr T 999
Can't you just speak to her and tell her to get off your back?


Ive tried but it doesn’t seem to get through.
Reply 8
Original post by Anonymous
Talk to them about the problems that you have with them.Perhaps they are just worried in their own way.
Show them that you can take responsibility and actually do it.
ASK them:what things do they think that you cant do on your own?Like if they were to abandon this attitude,what do they think can go wrong?
Also,do you think your Mother complained like this when she kept you in her Womb for so many months?


Valid points apart from the last one not sure what you mean
I don't get why everyone's complaining on here. I really dislike that whole "people are dying" argument, but we won't get into that here. Your problems seem valid enough, you're 31 and she is treating you like that which sounds like too much. Maybe try and let her to allow you to do smaller things on your own until she is more comfortable, such as going on some overnight trips? Obviously, in regards to the pandemic this might take a little while for you to actually be able to do, but you should be allowed to freely live how you want.
Original post by Freshprince2424
What he means is .... quit being a baby. No pun intended.

why are you trolling on my post? I thought you wanted me to ignore you
Original post by Freshprince2424
Look, you can't even make decisions and have opinions yourself instead you're here asking for advice. What do you expect? Make some independent decisions in life. Have your own thoughts and be more strong minded. Stop relying on other peoples thoughts and ideas of why your own mother treats you like this. We don't know you or her to make this judgement.

can you please stop commenting and trolling on my post. I'm not reading what you're saying I'm just seeing that you just being purely obnoxious and you must be some sad act behind this computer dishing out trash
Original post by Freshprince2424
Its people like you that make dudes like him sensitive and emotional. He needs to man up.


hahaha seriously, you must be some pathethic loser.. please stop replying being reminded of your pitiful existence will ruin my New year's Day
Original post by Freshprince2424
Trolling? I'm giving you brutal yet the realest advice you'll ever get bruh. I'm legit not trolling you.

You don't need to take my advice but if you were my brother I'd probably be doing the same because you seem like you can't think for yourself and would get peer pressured easily.


I don't want to take your advice. stop messaging me. I'm not the brother of some embarrassing troll
Original post by Freshprince2424
Whats sad is you on here whining like a spoiled little child at 2am about your damn mother. How old are you btw? 31 right? You're way too old to be this incapable of thinking for yourself.


hahah you're the sad, vile loser trolling on a vulnerable disabled troll. what's the matter with you? get a job. I feel bad for you
Original post by Freshprince2424
See, thats the problem. You're immature, you're using your disability and your mother to get a little bit of attention. Thats pretty sad if you ask me.

Get a job at 2am on new years day? Do you have a job? You wouldn't ask this question if you did


a very very sad pitiful lowlife. a total embarrassment.
Original post by Freshprince2424
See, thats the problem. You're immature, you're using your disability and your mother to get a little bit of attention. Thats pretty sad if you ask me.

Get a job at 2am on new years day? Do you have a job? You wouldn't ask this question if you did

I really can't resist saying something here, but then I'll go. What's sad is how defensive you are, how you hide behind a façade of "mAn uP" (what does that even mean anyway), and how you refuse to listen to anyone. You act like a child, I wouldn't be surprised if you are because you seem very oblivious to what life is like. I'm not even that experienced myself so even I understand that I don't know everything either. The "manly" thing to do would be to step back and have constructive conversations with people, instead of giving petty responses and acting so unnecessarily entitled. Have a good night instead of arguing on the internet.
Original post by Anonymous
Does my gender matter? And i dont live with her

Perhaps. What is the significance of "staunchly Muslim"?
OP is clearly bored.
Original post by Anonymous
I really can't resist saying something here, but then I'll go. What's sad is how defensive you are, how you hide behind a façade of "mAn uP" (what does that even mean anyway), and how you refuse to listen to anyone. You act like a child, I wouldn't be surprised if you are because you seem very oblivious to what life is like. I'm not even that experienced myself so even I understand that I don't know everything either. The "manly" thing to do would be to step back and have constructive conversations with people, instead of giving petty responses and acting so unnecessarily entitled. Have a good night instead of arguing on the internet.

thank you you. this person is very very ignorant, immature ,self-centred embodiment of toxic masculinity.

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