I dont understand my Mother

My Mum kicked me out for no reason at all when I was fifteen and I went to live with my Aunt. I was a straight A student, I didnt do drugs or drink alcohol. I never slept around, I kept my room tidy and did chores, I cant work out why she kicked me out but Im guessing a Man was involved and that has now crashed and burned.

Now Im twenty, I work and I'm paying my own rent and she wants me to move back home, but the thing is I haven't seen her in five years - I haven't even spoken so much as a word to her, every time I tried to call the phone wouldn't be answered or I'd lose the nerve and end the call myself. I dont have any younger siblings so her wanting me to look after someone wont be the reason why. I have two older brothers and an older sister, I haven't spoken to my siblings in a while but that's okay they have their own lives and they're parents to amazing kids

Do I ask her why she wants me home? Or do I just block and move on?

Reply 1

Aufbau

15

Do you know if she had any mental problems? Could your Aunt shed some light?

I would be open to talking just for closure. I’m sorry you went through that, it sounds really tough

Reply 2

himynameis20

OP

1

Original post by Aufbau

Do you know if she had any mental problems? Could your Aunt shed some light?

I would be open to talking just for closure. I’m sorry you went through that, it sounds really tough

My Aunt is my Dad's sister. She took me in because My Mum has no siblings and my Dad died when I was ten, sorry I should have clarified that. No mental health issues that I can think of, Im really bugged by all this

Reply 3

Bean_cat

15

Original post by himynameis20

My Mum kicked me out for no reason at all when I was fifteen and I went to live with my Aunt. I was a straight A student, I didnt do drugs or drink alcohol. I never slept around, I kept my room tidy and did chores, I cant work out why she kicked me out but Im guessing a Man was involved and that has now crashed and burned.

Now Im twenty, I work and I'm paying my own rent and she wants me to move back home, but the thing is I haven't seen her in five years - I haven't even spoken so much as a word to her, every time I tried to call the phone wouldn't be answered or I'd lose the nerve and end the call myself. I dont have any younger siblings so her wanting me to look after someone wont be the reason why. I have two older brothers and an older sister, I haven't spoken to my siblings in a while but that's okay they have their own lives and they're parents to amazing kids

Do I ask her why she wants me home? Or do I just block and move on?

There is so much to unpack here, but honestly it's totally in your control and up to you as to how you would want to handle the situation. Down the line it would be worth you knowing what happened back then for her to get rid of you like that and there may be more to it, especially if your father passed away (really sorry to hear that) your mother may have been struggling and it may have been for the best that you moved out so that you wouldn't have had to go through her 'struggle' with her.

She might want to reconcile and rebuild your relationship, there are so many reasons she may want you back; maybe to make up for lost time, explain herself, help and so many other things. In this situation you could go with your aunt to meet up with her or you could meet her at a cafe or a park to understand her better. You don't need to move back home with her especially after what she did and it's totally fine of you not to do what she wants.

I understand that I may have been overly sympathetic towards your mother in my response, but by the info you've given it does seem like there was more going on - it would be worth seeing what's going on with her for your own mental health and getting answers so that you don't have any regrets down the line. You don't have anything to lose in this, but the choice is yours and it could also mean improving your relationships with your siblings.

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

Original post by himynameis20

My Mum kicked me out for no reason at all when I was fifteen and I went to live with my Aunt. I was a straight A student, I didnt do drugs or drink alcohol. I never slept around, I kept my room tidy and did chores, I cant work out why she kicked me out but Im guessing a Man was involved and that has now crashed and burned.

Now Im twenty, I work and I'm paying my own rent and she wants me to move back home, but the thing is I haven't seen her in five years - I haven't even spoken so much as a word to her, every time I tried to call the phone wouldn't be answered or I'd lose the nerve and end the call myself. I dont have any younger siblings so her wanting me to look after someone wont be the reason why. I have two older brothers and an older sister, I haven't spoken to my siblings in a while but that's okay they have their own lives and they're parents to amazing kids

Do I ask her why she wants me home? Or do I just block and move on?

what exactly do you mean by 'a Man was involved' - was it your mum's partner?

I dont understand my Mother

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