I’ve convinced myself I’m stupid.

Hi! I don’t know how to really start this but I struggle with the issue that I’ve convinced myself I’m dumb and stupid. I don’t think I’m dumb at everything and actually believe I excel in things like English and History- but I’ve always believed I’m terrible at maths, biology, physics etc. Today I found out I got an A in one of my maths end of years (still got 3 more wish me luck), and it kind of threw me for a loop?? I know I never used to be bad at maths, but for some reason due to multiple bad scores- I just gave up trying and believed I was ****. Like I told my mom and her first response was to ask if I cheated lmaoo. Anyhow, I’m that friend that’s always be dubbed as the academically smart but lacks common sense. Ive been told multiple times that people just think I’m dumb before they actually become friends with me. Anyhow, anyway to get my self esteem up and motivate me to revise?

this happens to me more often than not. I can completely relate lol. I’m glad you’ve reached the realisation that you’re not dumb at all. for me, realising that I was at everyone else’s level, and not infinitely below, was enough motivation to study. good grades will gradually increase ur self esteem also, seems like you’ve made it a bit of a joke that you’re bad at those subjects, which is understandable, as its better to laugh at yourself rather than cry. I think it’s important to stop making it sthing to laugh at. it’s not true. you’re not bad at maths, or at science, or whatever. you’re good at it. if you let ppl laugh at the fact that you’re bad at it (when you’re truly not), they will slowly chip away at ur self esteem, even subconsciously. ppl repeating you’re bad at it will make u believe it, too. so stop joking about it. believe in urself and take those subjects on. don’t be afraid of failing. everyone already thinks you’re bad at it, even if ur not (and even if really, you shouldn’t care about what others think). from there on, u can only go upwards. good luck!