Is getting surgery to improve dating life bad?

I’m just tired of being single for 22 years.

Have you been single for 22 years, in which case you're about 40yo, or are you 22, so given you wouldn't be dating as a child it's more like 4 years?

Points to you having self-esteem issues. Get out there and find some hobbies and activities other than a gym obsession, and work on having an attractive personality; be someone that is caring, honest, trustworthy, a good communicator and conversationalist. There's plenty of time for relationships in future.

Ok yea, I’m 22 but still. I have never had trouble making friends or female friends. That’s prob why I’m assuming my personality isn’t the issue

I had a nose job when I was 23 and finally saved some money. My nose didn't look that bad but the doctor never turned me down. I did it for myself because I wasn't happy with my appearance, so this surgery boosted my self-esteem and it's the best thing I've done. I travelled abroad for the surgery because it was more affordable at the Forme clinic than in the UK. But if you really want to have it because it will make you happy, I would go for it. But definitely be careful when looking for a surgeon.

I’ll start off my saying that I keep things professional and never dive into my personal reasons for why I want to do plastic surgery etc. but it just inevitably comes up as a question from surgeons. I went to Cadogan Clinic in the London. They are supposedly well known but the surgeon just gave me condescending remarks saying that I was mentally ill and there was “nothing wrong with me”. But honestly they’re just a bit old and don’t understand how the dating world is these days- attractiveness is everything. I don’t personally feel like I hate my nose but clearly if I’m not succeeding in dating something is wrong with how I look and honestly I just really want a girlfriend. I have also thought about getting cheek implants (once again very well known surgeon in Harley street) but the surgeon just started going on about his love life and divorce and how “I just need to be rich and powerful to attract women”- which is like so out of order and unnecessary. I told him “yea ok but I kind of just want my surgery” and got the “I need to see a psychiatrist” talk. I’m genuinely so tired of all of this I feel like people are maybe more understanding of women getting plastic surgery as opposed to men or something because I get judged by surgeons all the time. I’m getting eyelid surgery in two months from a really good clinic but even they make remarks like “you’re not that bad looking just go to the gym and learn how to make girls laugh”- like wtf.

Ok yea, I’m 22 but still. I have never had trouble making friends or female friends. That’s prob why I’m assuming my personality isn’t the issue

I’ll start off my saying that I keep things professional and never dive into my personal reasons for why I want to do plastic surgery etc. but it just inevitably comes up as a question from surgeons. I went to Cadogan Clinic in the London. They are supposedly well known but the surgeon just gave me condescending remarks saying that I was mentally ill and there was “nothing wrong with me”. But honestly they’re just a bit old and don’t understand how the dating world is these days- attractiveness is everything. I don’t personally feel like I hate my nose but clearly if I’m not succeeding in dating something is wrong with how I look and honestly I just really want a girlfriend. I have also thought about getting cheek implants (once again very well known surgeon in Harley street) but the surgeon just started going on about his love life and divorce and how “I just need to be rich and powerful to attract women”- which is like so out of order and unnecessary. I told him “yea ok but I kind of just want my surgery” and got the “I need to see a psychiatrist” talk. I’m genuinely so tired of all of this I feel like people are maybe more understanding of women getting plastic surgery as opposed to men or something because I get judged by surgeons all the time. I’m getting eyelid surgery in two months from a really good clinic but even they make remarks like “you’re not that bad looking just go to the gym and learn how to make girls laugh”- like wtf.

This whole thread is so very sad.

Sounds like you're just looking for a quick fix. You want to change one thing and hope that it will dramatically transform your luck with women... instead of getting to the root cause as to why you're not successful.

Unless there's something about your face you've been really insecure about all your life (e.g. you have a nose Pinocchio would be proud of), you should listen to everyone else (there's a reason surgeons and everyone who's responded is telling you not to do it). Chances are you won't get the results you crave and you could end up making yourself look even worse (I'll refer you to Michael Jackson or Jackie Stallone).

I'll be brutally honest, I don't think you've trained anywhere near enough. The fact that even a surgeon suggested that you hit the gym backs it up. On both men and women, a good gym body is visible through most summer clothing, and I think in this day & age, having a good body accounts for slightly more than having a pretty face*. Also, remember desperation is one of the biggest turn offs. The fact that you're seriously considering plastic surgery purely to improve your chances with women tells us all how desperate you really are.

*EDIT:- I am talking purely from a looks / aesthetic point of view. Of course other personal attributes contribute to attraction and may well trump looks all together

If you want to genuinely improve your dating, then you need to take a good hard look at yourself, what do you have to "offer" women (i.e. why should they choose you and not Joe Blogs), as well as where, when and how you approach women. If you exclusively use dating apps, try approaching people in real life. There are a number of way you can do this that have been documented on this board multiple times (e.g. pub/ club, through hobbies etc.).

If you really want to stick with dating apps, why not pay for a professional photo-shoot and / or someone to Photoshop your pictures? Much cheaper and completely risk free.




Indeed... in every sense of the word

But honestly they’re just a bit old and don’t understand how the dating world is these days- attractiveness is everything.

Bear in mind that your dating pool might also decrease as a result of plastic surgery, especially if it is noticeable. Then you’ll come on TSR again and moan about how you aren’t getting any girls. You think plastic surgery will address all your problems, it won’t. Especially given you are not doing it for yourself, you are doing it for someone else.