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Estranged student - can't decide which university to go to.

I'm struggling to decide which university to go to due to my current situation.

Currently, I live on my own in a county, I'm an estranged student but my family know my address and lives 20 minutes away from me. I got accepted into a university that's half an hour away from me and they somehow know I'm going there this September.

The current university offers a lot more support as an estranged student and a lot more financial support.

The second university is in London, I'm moving there this year. The second university offers support to estranged students but not as much
If I were to stay with the current university. The second university is a 20 minute commute, it would be cheaper travelling there.

If I were to stay with the current university it would cost me £100.00 a month and I'd have to get three buses. My family have my current number, they do try to contact me, I'm worried if I were to move to London and stay with the current near by university they may wait by the gates for me to try and get me to talk to them.

How do I decide which university to choose? What would you do if you were in my situation?
Reply 1
I'd say try to contact the student services/support team of your first university and explain your situation with family aware of your enrollment, safety, privacy etc. A lot of support can be provided to help you stay at your current uni if you want to stay there. However many unis only offer extra support only if you ask them so they could establish some arrangements to help such as different campus access/timetable adjustments or access or proximity to campus safety staff. I think a conversation or some dialogue with your current uni could definitely help relieve some of your concerns. If you feel like your family would still be a burden/invasive contact your second uni and request additional support in preparation for going there next academic year and if additional support is available. All in all your family seem to be ignoring your wishes nonetheless and invading your privacy so maybe some help with a family charity or the police could help mitigate the risk of further interaction/ invasions of privacy. All the best for you.
Original post by Anonymous
I'm struggling to decide which university to go to due to my current situation.

Currently, I live on my own in a county, I'm an estranged student but my family know my address and lives 20 minutes away from me. I got accepted into a university that's half an hour away from me and they somehow know I'm going there this September.

The current university offers a lot more support as an estranged student and a lot more financial support.

The second university is in London, I'm moving there this year. The second university offers support to estranged students but not as much
If I were to stay with the current university. The second university is a 20 minute commute, it would be cheaper travelling there.

If I were to stay with the current university it would cost me £100.00 a month and I'd have to get three buses. My family have my current number, they do try to contact me, I'm worried if I were to move to London and stay with the current near by university they may wait by the gates for me to try and get me to talk to them.

How do I decide which university to choose? What would you do if you were in my situation?


Hi there,

Firstly, congratulations on getting a place at university. I think the best thing for you to do at this point would be to speak to the universities and see what support you will be able to access. I think it is important to think about what is best for you, which university do you like more, which course do you think is better.

I hope this helps,

Ellen
Y3 Medical Student
Uni of Sunderland
Digital Ambassador

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