The Student Room Group

Girls, would this type of guy be considered unattractive?

So I'm a mostly indoors person, a homebody. I exercise regularly, like I go the gym throughout the week and cycle every weekend and I also like to go to the cinema and like to restaurants for dinner and stuff.

But most of the time I'll be in my flat playing games, cooking, watching anime/tv shows/etc, chilling with my cat.

Would most girls consider someone like that too antisocial or boring?

I am introverted and shy as a person but I would want to find a gf at some point. I have a few close friends, I am not a complete loner but I pretty much prefer to stay indoors.
Original post by Anonymous
So I'm a mostly indoors person, a homebody. I exercise regularly, like I go the gym throughout the week and cycle every weekend and I also like to go to the cinema and like to restaurants for dinner and stuff.

But most of the time I'll be in my flat playing games, cooking, watching anime/tv shows/etc, chilling with my cat.

Would most girls consider someone like that too antisocial or boring?

I am introverted and shy as a person but I would want to find a gf at some point. I have a few close friends, I am not a complete loner but I pretty much prefer to stay indoors.


it depends what kind of girl you're looking for. if you want a party girl who's social and loving and will talk to anyone, then probably yes. if you want someone who will do all those things with you and is also introverted then no she will love you. every girl is different and at the end of the day you want someone to like you for you and not a changed version of you that you've created. hope this helped! x
Reply 2
Original post by annabelle16
it depends what kind of girl you're looking for. if you want a party girl who's social and loving and will talk to anyone, then probably yes. if you want someone who will do all those things with you and is also introverted then no she will love you. every girl is different and at the end of the day you want someone to like you for you and not a changed version of you that you've created. hope this helped! x

Thank you for your response.

I personally don't have a preference because both introverted and extroverted girls can be kind, funny, sweet, smart, etc. If we're talking like extremes here, girls who only ever want to party or socialise then yes I agree, I am not compatible with them. But are most, even extroverted, girls like that?

I guess I'm worried about it because I tend to gravitate towards girls who look more approachable and those tend to be extroverted girls. I do not have crippling anxiety or anything, I am just a bit shy and introverted but like when you try to approach someone, body language is very revealing and Idk, it has always been the case that the girls I approached were extroverts...
Original post by Anonymous
So I'm a mostly indoors person, a homebody. I exercise regularly, like I go the gym throughout the week and cycle every weekend and I also like to go to the cinema and like to restaurants for dinner and stuff.

But most of the time I'll be in my flat playing games, cooking, watching anime/tv shows/etc, chilling with my cat.

Would most girls consider someone like that too antisocial or boring?

I am introverted and shy as a person but I would want to find a gf at some point. I have a few close friends, I am not a complete loner but I pretty much prefer to stay indoors.


idk personally id find that hot
Reply 4
Ok re-reading what I posted makes it sound as if I am saying introverted girls are *****y or something. Not at all true ofc, I am introverted as well, I understand them completely. It's just more difficult to approach someone like ...myself than it is to approach a girl whose body language is relaxed and she's smiley and so on...
Reply 5
Original post by Anonymous
idk personally id find that hot

LOL thanks for giving me a little hope.
Reply 6
Original post by Anonymous
So I'm a mostly indoors person, a homebody. I exercise regularly, like I go the gym throughout the week and cycle every weekend and I also like to go to the cinema and like to restaurants for dinner and stuff.

But most of the time I'll be in my flat playing games, cooking, watching anime/tv shows/etc, chilling with my cat.

Would most girls consider someone like that too antisocial or boring?

I am introverted and shy as a person but I would want to find a gf at some point. I have a few close friends, I am not a complete loner but I pretty much prefer to stay indoors.


Hey, no I don't think most girls would consider this to be too antisocial/boring - to be honest, most girls would probably like this as they would be pretty sure you wouldn't cheat...and also I feel as though quite a lot of girls find very sociable and outgoing men quite intimidating (since us girls overthink everything haha).

Obviously, you wouldn't be everyone's cup of tea, but who is? You may feel as though you are 'boring' etc, but at the end of the day that's just your insecurities talking - there are loads of girls that will be into the same stuff as you and enjoy the more 'antisocial' lifestyle. You'll find someone :smile:
Reply 7
Original post by Anonymous
Ok re-reading what I posted makes it sound as if I am saying introverted girls are *****y or something. Not at all true ofc, I am introverted as well, I understand them completely. It's just more difficult to approach someone like ...myself than it is to approach a girl whose body language is relaxed and she's smiley and so on...

Dunno, I'm extremely introverted but also very smiley around people and am told I'm very approachable - those qualities are not mutually exclusive!

Your life-style sounds like a perfectly normal tbh. I don't think it would stop you from getting a partner.
Reply 8
Original post by Anonymous
idk personally id find that hot

same girl
Reply 9
Original post by alessia2
Hey, no I don't think most girls would consider this to be too antisocial/boring - to be honest, most girls would probably like this as they would be pretty sure you wouldn't cheat...and also I feel as though quite a lot of girls find very sociable and outgoing men quite intimidating (since us girls overthink everything haha).

Obviously, you wouldn't be everyone's cup of tea, but who is? You may feel as though you are 'boring' etc, but at the end of the day that's just your insecurities talking - there are loads of girls that will be into the same stuff as you and enjoy the more 'antisocial' lifestyle. You'll find someone :smile:


Original post by black tea
Dunno, I'm extremely introverted but also very smiley around people and am told I'm very approachable - those qualities are not mutually exclusive!

Your life-style sounds like a perfectly normal tbh. I don't think it would stop you from getting a partner.


Original post by alessia2
same girl

Ngl your posts made me feel infinitely better about myself, thanks so much.
Reply 10
Original post by Anonymous
Ngl your posts made me feel infinitely better about myself, thanks so much.


Np, just try to stop over analyzing yourself, you don't need to change for anyone. The right person will come along.
Everyone's different and likes different types of personality traits. So there will for sure be so many girls who love you for who you are and who will want to spend time and do the things that you like doing with you.
Original post by Anonymous
So I'm a mostly indoors person, a homebody. I exercise regularly, like I go the gym throughout the week and cycle every weekend and I also like to go to the cinema and like to restaurants for dinner and stuff.

But most of the time I'll be in my flat playing games, cooking, watching anime/tv shows/etc, chilling with my cat.

Would most girls consider someone like that too antisocial or boring?

I am introverted and shy as a person but I would want to find a gf at some point. I have a few close friends, I am not a complete loner but I pretty much prefer to stay indoors.


I'm a guy and I'm going to be straight with you... the girls / women here probably won't say what I'm about to, but you need to hear this if you're serious about sorting yourself out and want to improve your chances of getting a girlfriend (I'm assuming this is the (real) reason you're posting?)

First off, you will need to work on your shyness / introversion. The reason I'm saying this is because as a heterosexual male, these factors are at their most detrimental to you, due to the courtship "rules". Shyness is not as bad for a woman or a gay male, as they can always take a more passive role while they wait for a more assertive individual to take the initiative. As I'm sure you've experienced, women seldom ever make the first move. Unless you're very good looking (and can then rely on online dating) , no one is going to come and save you, so you need to get proactive and build your confidence in approaching people, breaking the ice etc.

Please note, I'm not saying that you should change those fundamental characteristics about you; I'm sure the right girl for you will love you for all of those things you've mentioned about yourself. But you need to work on putting yourself out there (after all, if you're stuck at home all day, how the hell are girls supposed to know that you're on the market, or even exist?).

In order to do that, you will probably need to put yourself in situations which you may not be completely comfortable doing, but the important thing is to keep your eye on the bigger picture (N.B. "If you want to make an omelette, you need to first beat some eggs"). I'm willing to give you some ideas, exercises etc., but I'd need to know a bit more about your background, and what you've done to try and meet people in the past.

Original post by Anonymous
Ngl your posts made me feel infinitely better about myself, thanks so much.


It's all well and good these posts making you "feel infinitely better" about yourself, but until you consciously start making an effort to put yourself out there, nothing's going to change. I know it's comfortable being where you are now, but the blunt truth is the sooner you make a start, the sooner you'll reap the benefits.

So come on then big man, what are you waiting for?
(edited 8 months ago)
Original post by Anonymous
Thank you for your response.

I personally don't have a preference because both introverted and extroverted girls can be kind, funny, sweet, smart, etc. If we're talking like extremes here, girls who only ever want to party or socialise then yes I agree, I am not compatible with them. But are most, even extroverted, girls like that?

I guess I'm worried about it because I tend to gravitate towards girls who look more approachable and those tend to be extroverted girls. I do not have crippling anxiety or anything, I am just a bit shy and introverted but like when you try to approach someone, body language is very revealing and Idk, it has always been the case that the girls I approached were extroverts...


nooooo not all girls are the same! not all girls want to party, not all girls want to get drunk, not all girls go thru a guy a week.
the trick to pulling a girl (or guy tbh) is just looking confident, even if you're not.
start by something simple like having good posture, seriously it makes a massive difference!
try to start conversation about anything, ask her a question that you already know the answer of just to start building a bridge.
its definitely going to take a bit longer for someone like who who is quite shy but slowly but surely you will get there!
You said gaming and anime....that's a hard pass for some. Because it's very childish.
(edited 8 months ago)

Quick Reply

Latest

Trending

Trending