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My bf lied to me

My bf and I are long distance. We see each other often and we just spent 3 months living together but now I’ve gone back to my country so we’re long distance again.

He stopped replying last night and didn’t answer any of my 7 calls or many texts even though he was active at some point. This morning he told me he left his phone in the gym and only got it in the morning. Of course I didnt believe it so I asked him so many times to tell me the truth and he kept saying that was the truth. Then I asked him to show me his battery history and he stopped replying. I called him and asked him to share his screen and he kept saying no that I need to calm down. After lots of begging (embarrassing) he showed me. He was on his phone throughout the night. I asked him what he done. He said he met his friend and smoked weed.

He knows I don’t want him to smoke weed bc we’ve had so many arguments about it and he said he won’t do it again. So he lied to me bc he knew I wouldn’t be ok with it. It isn’t an excuse. He said it happened another time as well when again he lied to me and that time I believed him and forgave him.

I feel so betrayed. In a few days it’s our one year anniversary and I feel so betrayed. I’m so sad. I don’t know what to do. Is this the ultimately reason to break up?
I have already told him I don’t wanna hear or see him again and blocked him. However I don’t know if this is the right choice. It does feel like it idk..

Apart from this, he’s the best boyfriend ever. We’ve never had an issue. He’s sweet all the time, romantic, good to me and my family, everything was basically perfect in our relationship. That’s why it’s such a shock. Please help
I think you were on shaky ground to begin with because your partner told you that they left their phone somewhere and your response was “Of course I didnt believe it”. There has to be a level of trust about what each of you are getting up to and I am not getting much sense of that from what you’ve written.
Reply 2
Original post by Admit-One
I think you were on shaky ground to begin with because your partner told you that they left their phone somewhere and your response was “Of course I didnt believe it”. There has to be a level of trust about what each of you are getting up to and I am not getting much sense of that from what you’ve written.


I said that because I’ve seen him active at some point so that’s why I didn’t believe it. He had to be on his phone to show that he was active
Original post by Anonymous
I said that because I’ve seen him active at some point so that’s why I didn’t believe it. He had to be on his phone to show that he was active


But why call him 7 times rather than assume he was busy and msg him and ask him to call back? I don’t know what the history to this was but you were suspicious of him. The trust is more of an issue than whatever he was up to and the white lie to try and avoid him getting in trouble.
Reply 4
Original post by Admit-One
But why call him 7 times rather than assume he was busy and msg him and ask him to call back? I don’t know what the history to this was but you were suspicious of him. The trust is more of an issue than whatever he was up to and the white lie to try and avoid him getting in trouble.


I’ve been cheated on before so I’m always suspicious. It’s a bad trait of mine. Focusing on the lie he’s told, do you think it’s really bad? Bad enough to break up?
Original post by Anonymous
My bf and I are long distance. We see each other often and we just spent 3 months living together but now I’ve gone back to my country so we’re long distance again.

He stopped replying last night and didn’t answer any of my 7 calls or many texts even though he was active at some point. This morning he told me he left his phone in the gym and only got it in the morning. Of course I didnt believe it so I asked him so many times to tell me the truth and he kept saying that was the truth. Then I asked him to show me his battery history and he stopped replying. I called him and asked him to share his screen and he kept saying no that I need to calm down. After lots of begging (embarrassing) he showed me. He was on his phone throughout the night. I asked him what he done. He said he met his friend and smoked weed.

He knows I don’t want him to smoke weed bc we’ve had so many arguments about it and he said he won’t do it again. So he lied to me bc he knew I wouldn’t be ok with it. It isn’t an excuse. He said it happened another time as well when again he lied to me and that time I believed him and forgave him.

I feel so betrayed. In a few days it’s our one year anniversary and I feel so betrayed. I’m so sad. I don’t know what to do. Is this the ultimately reason to break up?
I have already told him I don’t wanna hear or see him again and blocked him. However I don’t know if this is the right choice. It does feel like it idk..

Apart from this, he’s the best boyfriend ever. We’ve never had an issue. He’s sweet all the time, romantic, good to me and my family, everything was basically perfect in our relationship. That’s why it’s such a shock. Please help


Yeah, maybe it's for the best if he breaks up with you?
Smoking weed :eek:

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